Hi, I had been taking care of my parents for the last 4 plus years. I work from home part time. 15 months ago, my dad committed suicide in the back yard (we did not know there was a gun on the premises and he was a depressed and angry man). He left a suicide note in his pocket that said "Maybe with me gone, Ann will stay." Because I was considering hired caregivers because of the cruelty. Well, I stayed the last 15 months after my dad died and took care of my mom. I have 2 sisters but they had washed their hands of mom. She is not a part of their lives. I am burned out. Dementia has progressed. She is now on Hospice and went to a nursing home. They are doing a Medicaid spend down? She had the house in a trust and my younger sister is executor, because I lived out of state when they did the trust. Elder attorney has said I cannot live in the house without paying rent to the estate? My sister who is also the POA has not given me much information. I thought I could stay here until mom passes and then move when the house sells. Medicaid is taking half of her savings and life insurance. I wondered if anyone else has been in this situation. Should I have been getting paid as care giver for the last 4 years? I hope this all makes sense. With the house in a trust will Medicaid eventually get it? Ann
As to whether you should have been paid? That would have been up to you and your parents to have made a contract for Shared living costs, or for you to be a paid caregiver. That wasn't done, sadly, and cannot be done now.
Mom is in care now. It is likely best you move on with your own life away from all of this and visit her. It appears you sadly are not her POA or caregiver now. We often see people who give up their own family, jobs, life, to move in with family and care for them end jobless, without a job history, and homeless.
You can await their eviction. That will take them a while to get everything going. You can also get your own attorney for advice; that will take cash.
I am so sorry.