I'm facing yet another dilemma with my 92 y/o mother who lives in Memory Care. There is a resident who's wheelchair bound, harmless as a kitten, but keeps knocking on my mother's door and jiggling the lever-style door handle. Her unit stays locked and the man has no way to enter her room, so he gives up after a while and moves on to the next door. My mother has decided this man is extremely dangerous and wanting to harm her and 'punch her in the stomach'. Nothing I can say will talk her off the ledge. She can't sleep, she won't go into the dining room now for dinner for fear of running into him, and insists he's doing this even when she's not in her room (which makes no difference anyway). She wants to move out now, and is kicking up a giant fuss. I have already spoken with the Executive Director who says there is nothing she can really DO about this; it's harmless, it may be irritating, yes, but the man is not causing her any harm. I suggested last night we put something OVER the door handle.......I keep envisioning an umpire's face cage..........to prevent him from jiggling the handle. But that won't stop him from knocking on the door, I know.
She knows enough to call in a caregiver when this man is knocking/jiggling, and the caregiver redirects him right away. So they ARE able to manage the situation, but not to HER liking.
My mother has always been highly anxiety ridden, but nowadays it's amped up greatly due to this situation. Once this is resolved, it will be another drama............but I would like to clear this up, if possible. She is 100% convinced he is 'out to get' her. If I move her out, it'd be into Skilled Nursing WITH a roommate, which believe me would NOT be taken well. She hates women with a vengeance, and the toilet bowl is NOT something she'd like to share! She's much better off where she's at, at least for now.
Does anyone have ANY suggestions/ideas/remedies for how to fix this situation? My husband is saying we should tape a hand towel above the door handle to 'hide' it from this man's view. That may work, but wouldn't prevent him from knocking. The ED is saying she will tie a scarf with a big bow around the handle to see if that deters him.
Any ideas, ANYTHING?