What do we do if Medicaid won't pay for my mom in a nursing home and none of us can afford it?

They are terrible the nurse is in charge of 14 people they are always short handed. They of do not care about someones loved one. I was in one temporary to over pneumonia, and I heard someone chocking, I went in she showed in sign lounge that she was choking I got the night nurse who said I do not have to help her, I said to her if you do not help her I am calling the police on her behalf, So she said well in that case I should help her. She unclogged her airway. She could breathe better, her family came the next day to tell me thank you for saving their m others life. I complained to the nursing home, they said they did not have the time take care of all theses patients. I immediately left the facility. They do not care about your loved one in a nursing home.

capnhardass I totally agree! My father was treated horribly while in a rehab facility. They let him fall twice, were giving him the wrong medications, weren't feeding him when told to because of aspiration problems. I took him out after 2 weeks and brought him home where he died 6 days later.

I'm with capnhardass, every facility I've visited with my mom, could not tell me EXACTLY what the bill would be for my mom. The showed a "menu" of services, as if it was to her benefit, she would save a bundle of money this way.
But seriously, they had charges for "wellness check" and assistance walking the halls to go to dinner. All of these little charges, 25 here, 50 there, 40/hour for maintenance man to change a light bulb in closet, to me it seems like,
Hey, they have a captive audience, who are very lonely, and their bill is on auto-pay, and NOBODY is around to VERIFY these little charges actually happened, and maybe the resident is a little forgetful to boot!
So on top of the $3,600 rent for a tiny 1-bedroom apartment, which is $43,200/yearly, and will only increase 3-5% per year, will be lots of little charges that add up very quickly.
Oh and yes they only include 10 meals/month with that.

I am in the same position right now. I just dont know what to do , In reality, there is not that much help from the states If you are not wealthy or completely on the streets than your in for a rough road. This makes no sence our parents come from a generation that worked hard .our fathers faught during WW2 and the Korean war and died for this country . But when they need help they are on there own.
I pray for all of you that are on this site. All we can do is work with what we have and make the best of what we have. We are better together.

My mom 63 and just had brain stroke,she is now paralyzed on left side and completely incapable of doing ANYTHING. And before this horrible event she was full of energy and was big part of our lives. I have 3 children and full time job. Its brake my heart watching my mom helpless. she has Medicate but has very limited rehabs she can go to and so she went to one (not the one I wished)
and 2nights ago was taking to ER due to very low blood pressure 70/40
she now has better one sense she is hospital but its big concern. I have been an advocate for my mom for pass month but im not getting paid and I wonder if I can get pay to care for my mom after work.
Thanks

On the veterans note, any veteran who receives a pension and/or a surviving spouse can go to vetangels organizational website to see if they qualify for additional benefits.