Medicaid was declined. Now what?

Yes, good luck with the elder law attorney.

Good luck, and please let us know what the resolution is. We learn from each other here!

Thank you for all your suggestions. I have taken notes and will be discussing these with a Elder attorney and the Agency On Aging next week. I just want the best care for dad!

Yes, eldercare lawyer ASAP.
Who has POA?
If they are not divorced - his wife should then be responsible for his care and the bills for his care. (obviously he is better in your care physically and emotionally, but she is still liable financially I would think).      
Maybe if she is presented with the option of HER being his caretaker, since she is his wife, she may be amenable to legally divesting one of the homes to be sold, and/or a divorce that gives her the other home to keep living in. Especially since I would think SHE (not you and your husband) would be legally liable for all of his caretaking bills.    
It is time to take the legal bull by the horns.
If you have POA - get the divorce going for him, (or put one of his homes up for sale). Let the lawyer know all of the reasons why you are pursuing a divorce/sale of a home,  for him at this stage - it is so he can have Medicaid coverage for his care and ongoing medical needs.
If his wife has POA - time to give her a wake up call to the medical situation. Then she has the option to be helpful, or be a jerk, but if she is a jerk, you can then have an eldercare lawyer (or go to court on your own ) and have her POA revoked, and then the court can give it to you, or to a court appointed guardian ad litum for your dad. (BTW - document, document, document - everything, every bill, every medical treatment, every piece of paperwork, all communications with her, with Medicaid, etc).
If your county has an Agency on Aging, seek their guidance/advice on how to expedite this for him.
If you can't dispose of the property (ies), the only other option would be to try to mortgage the homes to pay for his care, or do a reverse mortgage. (again needs POA and gets complicated, but is doable).
I '''think'''' if the second home is sold, they would allow his wife to remain in the one home, and then qualify him for Medicaid.
Again, comes down to who has his POA, his marital status,
and/or going to court.
Ask a good eldercare lawyer, or county agency on aging what all of your options are and how best to proceed with this complex situation.

It sounds like a mess, and you surely have your hands full.
Just know that people you have never met are praying for you and wishing you the best during such a difficult situation.

Medicaid cannot just file a lien on joint property. This really needs a good lawyer to sort out. Being on deeds for two properties disqualifies him for Medicaid unless one is income producing and used for care.

someone having dementia doesn't automatically become incompetent. If he can understand the question and has an answer, he is competent, IMHO. On a good day, he may be competent. Not sure how to prove either way.

I had a fleeting idea...Can't Medicaid put a lien on one of the houses - so that when it comes time to liquidate dad's estate wifey won't get those proceeds!?!? Yes - a question for a Medicaid attorney. Maybe talk to wifey & tell her that's how it goes when a married couple has 2 homes...Either way, she's not going to walk away with 2 homes & they'll probably go after the one worth more - because they can, so she better sign over the one she doesn't want NOW & be glad she gets to keep the one.

As long as someone owns property etc. Medicaid will not kick in until his portion of the assets have been used up. An elder law attorney would be helpful.

NYDaughterinLaw, You asked why the dad is starting radiation when he has vascular dementia . Her Dad has dementia, her husband is starting radiation.

Why is your dad starting radiation when he has vascular dementia and is having mini strokes? Radiation has been demonstrated to create protein plaques on the brain. I suggest getting a second opinion about treating your dad's recurrent cancer versus palliative care keeping his quality of life clearly in focus.

I suggested, partly in jest, that the OP in some way convey her father to the residence of the estranged wife. She IS the person responsible for the OP's dad, and it seems as though " you want the two houses, here have the owner who bought them" might break the impass.

JJariz - Oh no! I should have clarified - I was referencing a post on a different site where someone simply suggested doing that - like dropping an unwanted pet off at the Humane Society. And it's the WIFE who has abandoned the OPs dad (with her selfish actions make that him ineligible for Medicaid) & who I would report to APS.  I completely agree with what you're saying - trying to juggle caring for LOs and "maneuvering" in a broken system requires "out of the box" solutions.

HeatherB67,
Just to be clear, I didn't advocate that she drop him off at the hospital. I said 'if you're desperate, next time he's IN THE HOSPITAL, don't agree to take him back into your home when he's discharged.'   There's a HUGE difference. It is the case manager's responsibility upon discharge to ensure that a patient returns to a safe environment. If DadsCareGiver1 doesn't think that Dad can be safe in her home, she is within her rights to say so.

I looked into what would happen if a person were to drop off a loved one at a hospital (sort of like those safe baby laws) & bailed. Seems there are laws for abandoning a vulnerable person. (To be clear, I was wondering because someone was advising someone do that & I thought it sounded like too easy an option that we would hear more about if it was common.) Anyway, she's basically abandoned him. She didn't roll up to a hospital & push him out, but her actions are obstructing his ability to have proper care - for her own financial gain. I agree with another poster - get APS involved. She shouldn't be able to keep 2 houses and expect you to run yourself ragged and into the ground without a fight. Try to find a Medicaid expert attorney, but it seems this issue also crosses over into family law venue...What a tangled mess.

When it comes to applying for Medicaid, A HOME IS A NON-COUNTABLE ASSET. You should appeal now.

Absolutely, see an attorney. Preferably elder law. Very important. It is sad but you really have a better chance of getting on Medicaid through an attorney also.

When my mom had to go to the nursing home the state did what they call dividing of assets.

My aunt had the state put a Lien on her home. It was paid upon her death.

Depending how desperate you are, next time he is hospitalized, you can refuse to allow him back into your home. This will force social workers to work the problem

So sorry. I think ur best bet is a lawyer. He knows the Medicaid rules in ur home state. Maybe he can work around the house thing.  If Dad is still married, she has some responsibility.  Bank accounts are half his if she never removed his name as is half the homes.  If he gets on Medicaid, at time of death a lean will be put on the houses.  If she sells, these leans will need to be paid back.  Make the lawyer aware that you are not able to care for both Dad and husband.  

Ralph Robbins makes some good points. Also, it may be possible to go to court with a "petition to partition" the jointly owned homes, separating them. Then, the one determined to be owned by your dad will be exempt under the home residence rule, and he should then qualify for Medicaid.

Dads...

The solution to your problem is somewhat dependent on the Medicaid eligibility rules in your state (what state do you live in?).

Every state, however, will have overarching Medicaid eligibility provisions which:

1. Only consider "countable" and "available" assets for eligibility purposes. The definition may vary but you will find it in your state's policy manual.

2. Have hardship exemptions with respect to excluding assets that would otherwise cause ineligibility when the life/health of the applicant is at issue.

I am sure you can imagine that you are not the only one to face this circumstance or one similar to it. I believe this is a relatively easy case to get approved with the proper argument and evidence.

If your dad owns house jointly with estranged wife then she either buys him out or he can do a reverse mortage on them to have income - talk to a lawyer on how to do this - wifey will find out that she only owns 1/2 & he has other 1/2 so it is his right to that $$$ - lawyer can set up something -

I bet she thinks she will end up with 2 houses & he gets nothing but that is not fair so maybe a suit for money will move her on 1 - ideally she gets one free & clear in her name & he gets other but the world is not ideal

Sounds like you need immediate assistance: 1) see an attorney. 2) You can appeal medicaid- file immediately if you are still within the time limit. 3) consider taking out a loan against one of his houses 4) see an attorney!!! We all mean well, however, there are many ins and outs of community property law and unless we are attorneys we aren't qualified to give you legal advise! Also, each state law is different. 5) call your local agency or department in aging for referrals and assistance! You can do this...take a deep breath!

If he has any income at all they will take that for his care and if the homes are also in his name they will put a lien on them. Do not expect free care but when his funds run out he will still receive good care if in a good licensed facility. Nothing is free but do seek advice from an elder law attorney.

The wife is still responsible for the husband and I would definitely contact APS and see if they are any help as well as an elder law attorney. I have done both with regard to my Mother and Father (wouldn't be of particular help to go into my situation). There is a very good elder law attorney in Dallas, TX named Michael Cohen who has lots of information on his site. He also might be able to recommend someone in your state. He also recommended someone to me that was able to get my Dad set up with the VA Aid & Attendance. I think you should all go to the wife's location (Dad's house) and tell her that you are all moving in with her. After all it is his house too. This may get her to move off dead center.

I´m sorry to hear you story, I'm an only child too and I have a very very hard time trying to help my parents alone. My mother is 86 and has cancer, my father is 85 and has vascular dementia and heart disease. Actually they have a very difficult economical situation since my father lost ALL of his assets 12 years ago, doing some wrong business. Last year I had to support everyone, even my husband who was unemployed for 12 months and had depresion. I have two young daugthers that I´must support as a mother, but sometimes I just can´t do it all. I hope you find here the best solution for your situation.

Seriously? Some of you are suggesting to drop her father on the doorstep of this nasty sounding estranged wife? I wouldn't trust her to take proper care of him.

She should get help from her kids financially or physically. Hopefully they are not sorry individuals like this gentlemen's "X" is. Does your county have an "Office on Aging" or a Dept. of social services?

I really hope you are able to get some relief with this situation Dadscaregiver1.

I used a specialist in Medicaid. She was able to assist me in everything that needed to be done to get Medicaid. She even went to Social Security for me. I got her name from an elder care attorney. It was well worth it! Good luck.

I used a specialist in Medicaid. She was able to assist me in everything that needed to be done to get Medicaid. She even went to Social Security for me. I got her name from an elder care attorney. It was well worth it! Good luck.