My aunt's memory & common sense are 40% lost & is defensive. She's in her late 80's and I moved into her one bedroom apartment about 2 months ago. We are both female. I learned that her memory and her ability to make sense of things works at about 55% capacity. Her emotional level is very childlike and other times she's fine. She also speaks like a child about 40% of the time. She also can get confused very easily, and often when we are walking about in familiar areas, can't figure out where she is, or even if she's in her own town. I end up repeating myself many times. When I ask her to make changes for sanitation reasons that can affect her/our health, she is usually defensive. Sometimes her tone is rude and she say things that are out in left field.
I'm trying my best to remain positive and supportive, but lately have been struggling with impatience. I could really use some help with any suggestions on things I can say to myself to adapt a better understanding for this situation so that my patience remains intact. My goal is to have an attitude toward her that is pleasant, respectful, supportive, understanding and nice to be around, as much as humanly possible.
What phrases do you tell yourself to keep up a great attitude to keep you pleasant?