I am 28 years old living with and looking after my 71 year old mom who has a touch of "sundowners" and has difficulty walking and other issues. She needs to have her meals and medications prepared. Plus help with bathroom etc. My two siblings are both close and much older than me. The one lives on the same farm as me, only in a separate house.
For the past six years, if I've want to go to an event or just work, we have had to make arrangements amongst each other to check her regularly. Luckily I farm with my sibling so we are able to be in and out of the yard.
Every time she has any fall or health issue. Things seem to become more difficult. She has some really good days and then there are the bad days making me feel really defeated and scared. I start hovering more and it is affecting my sleep causing nightmares.
I am finding myself making excuses to not see my friends, because they don't understand. I don't date. And with my circumstances I can't imaging bringing anyone into my life. I used to want a family with children. I loved kids , but now I'm questioning all of it because that requires taking care of them. I feel like an awful person. I'm constantly worrying about her to the point it is physically and emotionally draining me. I don't know..maybe I just need a break. I just don't know how. Let alone stop worrying enough to enjoy it.