Lost parent, lost child. Why is it still so hard to deal with his loss after 15 years? - AgingCare.com

Lost parent, lost child. Why is it still so hard to deal with his loss after 15 years?

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It's been 15 years since my daddy passed away from cancer. I was just 10 days shy of my sweet 16. Why is it still so hard to deal with his loss after 15 years?

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I'm 44 and my dad died when I was 15.
You don't really get over it.
You set it aside so you can get life done.
Sometimes I let it visit me, but it can't stay.
Sometimes I visit it.
But that is no way to remain.
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Stevie... I know the feeling. I was 18 when my father dies (now decades ago), and the emptiness always stays with you. I do however always feel like he's with me and I always send him my love as if he can 'know'. I think the good thing for you, me and others who lost a parent in our teens is that we can still remember them... We have memories... My youngest brother was only 7 when our father passed, and he doesn't remember him. I have shared happy stories with him (like the time we were going to bed and we were giggling so much, and my father heard us...). Just know you're not alone...here on earth and... otherwise. I'm sure your father was/is so proud of you... Enjoy your life... He would want you to do that and he would want you to be happy.
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Stevie, you were at a critical age when you lost your father - growing from a teenager into a young man. Your father had he lived would have been able to guide you through that transition, to share his knowledge, experience and guidance. The bonds between you would have intensified.

With his death, you missed all that; perhaps there's a part of you that still needs that closeness even though you're now in your 30's. It was a part of growing up and bonding that you missed.

I don't think we ever really stop grieving for family (and friends as well) who've died. We just grieve differently.
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Stevie, Listen to me:

About ten years ago I decided that I needed to see a therapist because a family issue had come up that was so devastating and overwhelming that I knew I could not handle it alone.

Wow, all I could say was: what had I been waiting for? Why did it take so long? If I had done that earlier, the whole situation might have been different! It helped so much that I continue to see this therapist ten years later off and on--whenever I need a tune-up.

Try it out. My insurance pays all but $10!!
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First because u were so young. I think we except death better as we get older. Maybe you weren't allow to grieve in your own timeline. Find a grief group. We have one at our Church. If talking with strangers is not ur thing, see a therapist. In our area they go on income.
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