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I'm in NE Alabama and I'm looking for someone to care for my mother in THEIR home while I build her a house. Maybe someone with an extra room who is a caretaker. She is an amputee (she just had an amputation of the right leg above the knee a month ago) and has mild dementia. The place where she is at now is too small for decent wheelchair access and getting around in, it is an RV, so I've got to break some ground and build her a house. I have no other help from family, so I need to outsource her care to a private party, [no nursing homes]. Any suggestions?

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That’s so sweet of you! It is so hard to find care facilities in the rural South, I was very lucky to find an assisted living home out in a rural area near the Mississippi/Alabama border. There are 20 residents, all in a home like building. It’s reasonably affordable being less than half the amount another ALF in a nearby town quoted. At assisted living, the residents need extra help with activities of daily living and the rooms are large. It’s nicely done atmosphere and three square meals a day are a big draw.

True, if your mom needs skilled nursing care, I don’t know what to recommend.

But ask around, a senior center could possibly give you some tips. I hope you find the situation you are looking for.
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She doesn't need skilled nursing care, she just needs help with bathing and meals and transferring. She even changes her own diapers. As far as transferring, she's 103 lbs soak and wet.
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albuild, sadly with dementia that can change quickly. One fall can make dementia a bit worse, etc.

My concern with you just breaking ground to build a house, do you need county approval for zoning, etc.? Do you need to provide building blueprints to the county? Well and septic? Dealing with county government in itself can take a lot of time. Then it could take many months to even get the house built, due to the numerous Inspectors that need to approve the work. Now if you are building also as a future investment, then no problem. Just don't use any of Mom's savings if she need to apply for Medicaid [different from Medicare] later down the road.

In the mean time, during the time you are building, your Mom could wind up needed skilled caregiving care, more so than what you could provide. My Mom was 90 lbs and it took two caregivers to transfer her because it was like lifting up a 90 lb barbell.
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Well assisted living is what you are needing. Look online on Google for assisted living facilities around Tupelo or Iuka and word of mouth can be very helpful. Good luck!
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Don't build your Mom a new house. It is entirely likely that she will need 24/7 care by the time it is finished, and she will never live there. Look for group homes or residential care homes.
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@freqflyer
No building codes here, this is Alabama. They don't even have a building inspection dept. in this county, (less government, imagine that!). Also some of mom's money will be used and would never be enough to reimburse medicaid in full anyway. I'm not giving her money to the government and she doesn't want me to. We want private parties to receive money in exchange for care, not the government.

@DianaHollis
We don't want to forfeit all of moms assets to the government in exchange for assisted living or nursing home care. Private caretakers can provide all of everything they can and do it better for a much lower cost and moms heirs can still keep their inheritance. We've discussed this with mom and she agrees the government should not get her assets, her children should. We can do this without them.

@jjariz
What is a "group home" and "residential care home"? Are they subsidized by medicaid the same way nursing homes and assisted living facilities are? If so we can't use them for reasons of medicaid asset seizure as stated above.
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albuild33, have you price out the cost of having around the clock caregivers?

For my Dad, it was costing him $20k per month, yes per month to have professional experience caregivers from an agency that was licensed, insured, bonded and had workman's comp. Prices vary from area to area.

If you use non-agency caregivers, independent contractors, you need to contact your insurance carrier to purchase workman's comp insurance just in case one of the caregiver's gets injured on the job. Plus figure out how to do payroll taxes. And draw up an employment contract.

Some people like to use live-in caregivers, but the caregiver might be limited to 40 hours per week depending on State law. If that was the case, someone would need to take over on the other hours and weekends.

Never say never when it comes to a nursing home. My Mom had a serious fall that had head trauma and there was no way at-home caregivers could take care of her. She lived in long-term-care as it took a village to take care of her :(
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