How do we go about looking for a person to live with our Mom (89)?

Sherry what's peo and is there a monthly fee? I sent you a message. Thx

Professional Employer Organization. They take care of all human resources type things, payroll, taxes, all payroll deductions, probably other things as well. Shopping health insurance?

Sherry, What is a PEO, can you give an example, and are they paid a percentage?

Using a PEO payroll employer helps. I use this for my office staff as well. It relieves me of the responsibilities of an employer. The PEO is actually the employer and I "rent" the staff members. They take care of taxes etc.

Check your state laws on live in domestic workers. Minimum wages apply as well as time off and vacation pay. Talk to an attorney about a contract, don't run into this blindly.

You might soon be responsible for entertaining both of them!

Try utilizing a small LICSA, they provide home health aide services at a more affordable rate.

I found one of those people - a woman who lost everything in a nasty divorce. She has been with us for 6 months now and it is wonderful. We pay her $250 per week and furnish her with a private suite (bedroom, living room and bath). She works elsewhere 24 hours a week. I do the cooking, she washes dishes. I keep the baby monitor with me nights so she is not responsible for anything at night. If you just want to have someone who is a "room mate" so to speak, I think that as long as the person was not responsible for your mother's care you could find the right person. I went through care.com and they have all sorts of individuals who post there. Some are looking for a situation like you have, but most want some kind of pay. I feel very fortunate to have the situation that I have. We did a background check that was offered through care.

If mom wishes to stay in her home, consider renting out a room to a middle-aged woman (perhaps a widow herself) and use the proceeds from rent (which is taxable income) to hire a caregiver for a few hours several times per week. You will be extremely lucky to find anyone wiling to give up 24/7/365 for NO money and ALL of the responsibility. Much better approach is to assemble a team of caregivers. Perhaps need 2 ladies who split the overnite duties. I just find it very difficult to imagine anyone "good" for a vulnerable adult, will work such extended hours, for no money. Go for the team approach--I do know several people who have done exactly this, and it works. Most are working privately not thru agencies, they do their owb background checks, hire an accountant for the taxes, and had their insurance updated to reflect the Team.

If you want your Mom to stay in her home, your best bet is to hire a paid companion and not offer free room and board. Most people want a salary so that they can add money to their own retirement funds, and have time off for their own life. For night-time hire a paid Aide for that shift, who can sleep over but still be there if your Mom needs help with something.

in another state than me.

It is not smart for an elder to live alone who shouldn't be, such as elders who are considered legally blind. Yes, that was my mother, but she still insisted on living alone in her own home, in another state me than me, her daughter, until one day I just had to pack up my bag and move in. Extremely difficult!

I agree , you need to contact your local Area Agency On Aging. That is a great resource which is under utilized!

Finding a live in is difficult, and more so if just room and board was the only compensation. If there is a senior center or a local adult medical day care your mom could meet new people and keep active. They have a wide variety of activities and there is time to socialize. They also serve lunch. You don't say if your mom is low income, contact your local Area Agency on Aging or Bureau of Senior Services, they will be able to give you options, there are programs out there that provide in home care etc. Good luck.

Find me one of those people too! Mother is 93 and was doing ok at home with about 20 hours of hired help (and lots of family support). Then got severe neck pain and despite Vicodin couldn't handle the pain even with lots more help. Had to go to SNF 7 weeks ago. Now doing better and would love to come "home". Don't know if that is possible (or smart). Has anyone else gone thru a situation like this? Mobility issues, pill management, and needing great family support are the big problems.

Looking at your profile your Mom's primary ailment seems to be mobility. Does she have dementia? Is Mom safe by herself?

A live in caregiver in my area would cost approximately $12,000.00 a month. Room and board in my opinion is not sufficient hardly a fair trade. In addition a 60 or 70 year old woman if she doesn't have health issues will likely develop them in the future especially if she is having to help Mom with transfers, dressing and the like. The caregiver/roommate's back would be a huge concern. Finding someone reputable without using an agency is another. I imagine you could check churches in the area to try to find a person to your Mom's liking.

Is there a senior center Mom could go to? Maybe your Mom could strike up friendships where someone to help and live in might be found. You and your sister should however be at the doctor visits. Having someone else take on that responsibility is not fair to Mom or the caregiver.

So, bite the bullet and get your Mom innto an assisted living facility. She will make many friends have activities each day, fed and have a staff to watch over her.