Living in my parents home for approx 8 years taking care of them through end of lives. Do I have any rights to stay longer in the house? - AgingCare.com

Living in my parents home for approx 8 years taking care of them through end of lives. Do I have any rights to stay longer in the house?

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My brothers wanted me moved out in 2 weeks. When it was impossible for my mother to care for my dad by herself (he had parkinsons) I moved from another state to help her. After he passed my mother asked me to stay with her at least for a while. I had a very minimal part time job outside the home. I was given room and board by parents. Then my mom was diagnosed with Merkel cell carcinoma 3 years ago and underwent radiation therapy, chemo and immunotherapy. It was a long, rough 3 years. Now my brothers, 2 who live in town and one out of state, did no caregiving until the last few days of her life, want me moved out of house in 2 weeks. My eldest bro is executor. The house will be sold and split equally. I haven't even caught my breath from the sleepless last weeks of moms life, let alone grieve. I'm in shock that they want me out so quickly. Must I leave so soon. If I stay longer must I pay utilities and or rent? I'm just too pooped to move.

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I feel for you. Similar situation, except that I foresaw problems later and acquired executorship, so that I won't be booted out when the time comes. Whether that will actually protect me, I don't know. Can you contact a lawyer or legal aid agency? Or try talking calmly to your brothers again and explain that you need at least thirty days to recover and readjust to your circumstances. If that doesn't work, then fight back and force them to evict you as suggested above. I'm sure it will all work out ok. Hugs for you.
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Your brothers are jerks.

Make them go through the legal steps to evict you. That will buy a little time.

Your parents should have paid you for your caregiving services. Nothing can be done about that now. But Brothers should certainly show consideration for you.

Start looking immediately for another place to live, with a short-term or month-to-month lease. Don't make any long-term decisions so soon. I hope things settle down for you soon, and you find peace in your new situation.
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ifar - my condolences on your loss. I hope you find peace soon.

Yes, it is likely the house can go on the market before the estate closes. I would recommend that you check for a Legal Services Corporation(LSC) agency in your area for free legal advice. LSC is a government agency that funds legal agencies in all US states for low-income folks. And/or does your Mom's estate have an attorney assisting your brother? Sometimes it's easier to speak with the impartial attorney involved than speaking to a sibling - no underlying emotional feelings.

GA is correct in that your living there while the home is on the market would actually be an asset. And....the bottom line is that there are legal protections for you....the key here is negotiation.

Good luck!
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No Medicaid involved. I don't want to have a prolonged stay here and want to put the house on the market. I just felt I wanted to be able to recover from weeks of sleep deprivation and figure out where I'm going to live. I thought I could stay until the house closed. I would pay back cost of living here from my share of estate. I didn't know that my brother, executor is paying out of his pocket. I think there is an estate account from mom's bank accounts for expenses. Not sure about this. The house should sell fast in this area. Mom died sooner than expected so there was lots of unfinished business. Thought the brothers might show their appreciation for my years of caregiving ( they continued in their careers,paid their mortgages, etc.) but since they aren't I just wondered what my rights are to stay in the house more than 2'weeks. Frankly I'm insulted that they are pushing me out so fast in the midst of grieving and no concrete plans on where to go. Can the house go up for sale before the court has closed the estate?
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You already own 1/3 of the house, can you get a mortgage for the other 2/3 and buy them out? Was Medicaid involved at all? If it was, apply for a hardship exemption for the property. That would stop MERP from foreclosing.
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Check the Port Orchard court system to see if there's a landlord-tenant court; contact them to get more information on your rights. Sometimes court officials can't give legal advice, so just ask them what the law requires as notice, i.e., written or verbal, how many days, etc.

I would think written notice is minimal - typically someone can't be evicted based on verbal notice.

Then do some research of the county bar association to see if there are any pro bono attorneys who might be able to help you at least get the notice to which you're entitled.

I would also remind the brothers that a vacant house is not appealing to the homeowner's insurance carrier, and once you're gone, they'll have to notify the carrier and can expect to pay more money for insurance coverage while they house is being prepared for sale and sitting on the market - for who knows how long.

You could also notify the carrier yourself once you've moved.
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Talk to them honestly and cry. Maybe that will buy you a few months.
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I agree with rainmom, but you must realize the executor is responsible to make sure the expenses for the home must be maintained until it is sold. It is unfair for you to live in that home rent or utility free and expect the executor and other heirs to absorb the cost of maintaining the home until it is sold. Sorry for your loss and hopefully you and your brothers can find a temporary working solution.
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Check into tennents rights in your state - you might be able to gain a small amount of time under those laws if you qualify - and your brother may have to legally evict you. Eviction takes time but it could be as short as 30 days. Yes, most likely you would be responsible for the utilities during this time and I'm guessing if you didn't pay them your brother may legally be able to deduct the amount from your share of the estate. But do you really want to go that route? It could end up effecting your credit rating which could have all sorts of ramifications when you do have to get your own place. Also, I imagine going the eviction route would generate even more sibling hard feelings than what looks like is already guarenteed to occur. I'm guessing you did not have any caregivers contract with your mother - which means you are left with no real legal protection from what appears to be coming your way. If you have any savings I would urge you pull it together and find an apartment for yourself before this gets really ugly. Your brothers sound like jerks - it seems reasonable to allow you to stay there while the house is getting to sell and while the house is on the market. Have you discussed this option with them as a possibility? If not I would urge you to give it a shot while looking for a place if your own. I'm sorry for your loss and hope things work out for you. You've made an honest mistake so often seen here - when an adult child gives up their own life to move in and care for ailing parents without a caregivers contract. It's a mistake grown from love and the desire to help but a mistake none the less. I'm sorry.
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