Dad has dementia, but is able to live alone. I believe his body is shutting down. Are we legally okay to let him pass at home?

Call your local area agency on aging. They are a fantastic resource to help you and your Dad!

Sorry to hear of your Dad's passing.. But you are right in saying you will Celebrate his life!! I'm sure he is proud of all you did for him while he was on this earth...

Crumble33, in a way my heart goes out to you for your loss.. but all we caregiver know we lost our parent(s) way back when. But I'm so glad your Dad passed as he did and your paramedic people acted as they did. You know, and some who are not in our situation, would not understand...I'm happy for you. It sounded peaceful. I hope it goes that well with my Mother -- is that selfish of me? I don't know. But after all the other duties you have to attend to, Crumble33, take a rest, pat yourself on the back and sit and know that you did all you were humanly able to do for your Dad. No one can ask anything more. I only hope that I am as strong as you!

Awww...so sorry for your loss, but it sounds like it all worked out for the best. I'm glad you updated on what happened once he passed so others can learn from your experience. Take care.

So sorry for your loss.You handled things just how your Dad wanted. May he be enjoying his reunion with Mom, and may you have peace of mind that you were a good daughter and always by his side, whether literally or figuratively.....you were there for him. God Bless.

@ crumble,
dementia is so debilitating and torturous for the parent that i think youll feel relieved for your dad. my mom got so bad with hallucinations that only haldol, orally and injected monthly kept her sane. not a good QOL imo. a month ago when she could no longer enjoy even good food i felt like she was only existing , not finding any enjoyment any more.

God bless you and your family, sweetie. How beautiful is your testimony - that you were able to be around your dad as he passed into eternity with the LORD. Peace and joy to you.

Thank you all for your wonderful advise and I wanted to give you all an update. Dad passed away yesterday, at home in his own bed. I was able to stay w/ him almost 24/7 during his last days, my brother would give me some breaks. We did have hospice for our mother 11 months ago, but dad didn't even want hospice. All of his wishes were taken care of. We did have to call 911, but we had no issues, they asked if we wanted resusitation and we said no. Paramedics showed up and dad had a pace/defib, so they hooked up the heart monitor and the pace/defib was working perfect and then they turned to use to say that he had passed. The Ambulance crew came in and took more notes, questions asked how he had started declining. While I left to make some calls, the police showed up, asked some questions, took some notes and the funeral home had already been called. We waited for our funeral director and everyone stayed to help load dad. The ambulance crew were told by the paramedics that dad was dead and they didn't not have to transport to a hospital. The funeral director went to dad's family dr. yesterday and had the death certificate signed. Paramedics and ambulance crew said that we did everything perfect, the only reason the police came was because dad was living "alone" and so they had to document everything. Dad is now w/ mom and our Lord and I'm so happy to say that he has a healthy brain again. Living w/ his dementia was harder then allowing him to die at home. My brothers and I have already made all arrangements and will be Celebration his life and Graduation to heaven this coming week. Thank you all again for your insight!

Another reason you want to contact hospice is that when they do die at home, you will call them, especially if it is the VNA hospice -- you will not call 911. That's how it was with my father, plus they just help so much. I am not sure with other hospice services.

When my 92-year old Mother passes, I do not intend to call 911. I am going to call her doctor first. My cousin, who is a nurse and knew her Mother was definitely dead, called 911 when her mother passed. She's so sorry she did. They came and tried to resuscitate her. She said, they might also want to take her to the hospital. I won't have any of that. I'm not sure how 911 might be in your area, but if that's how they are, as my cousin said, in my area, I will not call them.

As long as you are caring for him well enough that no one can accuse you of being negligent in his care, then you should be okay. If he falls, or needs emergency medical care for any other reason, I wouldn't mention he "lives alone" or you could open yourself up for trouble. Since you live so close by, I would suggest purchasing (or borrowing) a long-range baby monitor for when you are not with him.

Okay - so he really is not living alone. Hospice provides wonderful care - comfort care at the end of one's life. You could look into it and see if it is a service you need/want.

Bless you during this time.

I live w/in 100 feet of him and have fixed all of his meals and meds for years. I am at his house more then my own home.

You definitely want hospice involved - especially where he has no in-home care 24/7.

How is your father preparing his meals? Is he pureeing his meals?

I am concerned that you all allow him to live alone, given his level of medical needs.