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I help care for a friend's grandma who has memory issues, her doctor wants a neurologist to examine her grandma. my friend has canceled the appointment's (more then twice) because she wants the will changed before her grandma is possible diagnosed with dementia or alzheimer's. what i'd like to know is when do they send up a red flag for cancelling to many appointments and can i get into trouble for not reporting her?

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The Dr.'s office may refuse to book another appointment for the grandmother if she's cancelled too many times but it's not illegal to cancel appointments.

You think your friend should be reported for repeatedly cancelling appointments because the friend is afraid that if her grandma is diagnosed with dementia she won't be able to change her will. Is that it?

If you don't report her who's going to get you into trouble?

If you feel that your friend is manipulating her grandmother and compromising her health in the process you can contact an agency anonymously.
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Tell your friend that getting a diagnosis of dementia will not immediately disqualify her grandma from changing her will.

But what is the delay? She cancelled an appointment ... why didn't she go ahead and change the will? Is your friend trying to get her grandma to change the will and grandma doesn't want to?

It is illegal to coerce someone into changing a will.
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A simple call to Adult Protective Services may dissuade your friend from any further coercion of her grandma to try to bet her to change her will. If your friend went through with that the attorney would be hesitant as if grandma is not competent attorney could be brought up on charges. But, more difficult would be the fallout after current beneficiaries find out. Any changes to the will are grandma's decision.
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What are the intended changes in the will? If her grandmother made the will before the Demenia, why does your friend want to change it?
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It will be up to the attorney handling the changes in the will to 'prove' that the person is competent to sign the documents prepared. In Texas, it is two very simple questions something like Do you recognize this document to be your last will and testament and Does it contain your wishes with regard to disposal of your property, etc. My dad was able to do that even though he was no longer able to do other significant ADL's.
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A doctor can "fire" a patient just as a patient can, but cancelling an appointment is usually not grounds for it. The person who would be making this Will and then notarizing it will be testifying that this person is "of sound mind and body" and signing without "duress". Can this woman do this? Probably not, but if she is in the early stages of dementia, she probably can.
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When we changed Mom's will, the attorney met with her privately to determine personally that she was of sound mind. Only then did the process continue. If your friend tries to make changes in any other way it might result in legal challenges later -- an unpleasant and expensive experience.
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You may find that the lawyer will not change the will if the Grandma can not show that she is competent. With or without a medical diagnosis after talking to her for a few moments the lawyer could determine that he can not make any changes.
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What you're describing sounds to me like a big red flag. You say that your friend wants her grandma's will changed before the neurology appointment, huge red flag! It sounds to me like the grandma is most likely being manipulated into changing her well before she has a chance to be diagnosed with cognitive decline such as dementia or Alzheimer's. You and this friend already know the grandma is having memory issues. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but did you know that if you knowingly let this go on that you're just as guilty as the other party because you knew and did nothing about it? If you know a crime is being committed against an elder such as an elder being taken advantage of, it's up to you to report it even if you're not involved in it. Not doing so makes you just as guilty as the one doing it. Please do the right thing and report this if you can't put a stop to it. I would also alert the neurologist with whom this patient is supposed to be seeing. Tell them what's happening and why. All you have to tell them is what you told us here and who the patient is and your concerns as to the reason behind all of the appointment cancellations.

What I would suggest doing is seeing if you can secretly get this grandma scheduled for an appointment while this friend is working. That way only you and the neurologist know. You have an advantage since you're helping to care for this elder. If you can get her into an appointment, you can get her diagnosis and everything can come out in the wash later if you can get the neurologist and other proper channels in your corner.
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The only time someone could get in trouble would be if it was court ordered or Office of Aging requsted it.
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While it's not illegal to cancel doctor appointments, two items of concern= #1 they may charge you a missed doctor appointment fee if you cancel under 24 hours and #2 the doctor is going to get the "gist" of the patient not really being needed to be evaluated/seen.
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