I am not the care giver my girlfriend is ,Im lucky I get to go to work Susie gets very little help from her family and im sure theres a ton I could be doing as well ,we moved into her moms place from ours about 8months ago to help keep her from having to go to a home so since I just met her in the last year I don't really notice the changes and can only guess at what Susie must be dealing with cause we don't have much time to talk anymore .im rambling so I will end it with this I think what anyone who is taking care of a family member instead of placing them into a home even if to find out that its just too much the world is a better place thanks to you all

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If Mom has no interest in getting out of bed even to sit on the couch or go to the bathroom, do you still think it is important to keep her from going to a home? Can't she lie in bed and look at the ceiling in any clean, safe place? Does it really matter if it is her own home ceiling or not?

And you might be surprised that in a care setting she may become more active. After a few months in a nursing home my mother was going cooperatively to have a shower (which she fought about at home), going to bingo, crafts, cooking, gardening activities, live entertainment -- my sisters and I looked at each other and said "who is this woman and what have they done with our mother?"

Susie's Mom wanted to stay at home, or her family wanted her to stay home. You and Susie gave that a good solid try. I think it is time to re-evaluate what would really be best for Mom.
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Your girlfriend is lucky to have your support and love. Caregiving is exausting on a good day. So kudos for you....give her a break if she snaps at you sometimes. Thats the thing i find is most one seems to understand why im grouchy.....geez! ;)
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