Need help having nursing home keep Mom active.

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1. Mom was successfully placed in a great Nursing Home on Long Island this April. Well run, friendly staff, beautiful grounds...
2. Took some acclimation. Doing great now with help from Aricept. Not Alzheimers. 87 y.o, plus MBI from repeated falls & head injuries. Does not remember the past 10 years. Knows family members and her new environment.
3. Brother lives 5 minutes away and sees her almost on a daily basis. Good guy.
4. PROBLEM: -They delayed getting her ambulatory after arm fracture healed bec. she lacks balance even with a walker and could topple backwards. She can walk.
SO she spends way too much time in a wheelchair, to the point that she requests that they pull her from the great "community space" room and let her lie down in her bed because her back hurts her from so much sitting. My brother walks her at every opportunity.

Can he demand a written plan from staff to guarantee a daily quota of individual attention for her involving say 30 minutes of assisted walking down the halls? Must this be couched as a therapy order?

Second, she is a naysayer, meaning, even before all this she would turn down requests to go out to eat with is or favors be done for her. Case in point, they have nice courtyard - garden areas with raised boxes and she is growing tomato and pepper plant with my brother's help. They do not get watered by anyone but him.

How do we get the staff to be more proactive with her needs and take her out daily to visit with her garden - she was an avid gardener........

Brother is a charmer and has a great relationship with staff but not enough is being done for her anyway.....

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Danica: She definitely needs PT. I hope she is getting it. Maybe she is requesting to go back to bed because it hurts too much. Great idea on the garden, but get her healed first and foremost!
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I agree with many of the responses here, however i am wondering if her back really does hurt: can you make adaptations to the wheelchair? Is it tge correct size? My SIL needs a child size Are the foot rests attached for support or do her feet dangle? Does she have a cushion to sit on or support her back? Maybe its an excuse to gi back to bed?

The staff will not take care of the garden--its not realistic, in my opinion. They are--and should be-- focused on patient care. They just dont have time for one on one activities.

Finally, no matter how great or good the establishment is or what great care they provide --it's likely you willbe let down and disappointed. It is super hard work and the turnover is VERY high. Finally, no matter h9w great the place you must let them know you are very involved and know what is happening with your mom's care.

It also helps to bring flowers and cookies!☺
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Well, Danica, at least you have a better understanding now of what to expect as "normal" or "usual" in a US nursing home. And since that is where your mother is, that is probably useful information.
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Danica, I'm sorry if i offended you! I just meant to point out that Aricept is not a deug that is going to help elevate your mom's mood and possible relieve her distress. She CAN take both. Many people do.

My mother is in a NH in Connecticut, and it is VERY assistive. But they are simply not allowed to make people do what they decline to do. That's all anyone was trying to say. I hope you'll reconsider and stay.
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Aloha. AND Aloha which also means good bye. I read postings on this site in a cursory manner. Until this discussion I did not realize that you act as police.
My mother's current problem is that in the US nursing home stuff is assigned only nursing and custodial functions (food & pill dispensing) but not assistive, like in Europe. Sorry I erred on Aricept. This site is not very helpful.
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No, aricept is an acetocholine inhibitor. Not serotonin. Antidepressants are SSRIs Or Ssnris. Differenent neurotransmi\rts
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Is your brother the Healthcare Power of Attorney for your mom?
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Oh, BTW, Aricept did smooth out my moods initially. I was upset at cognitive loss & decline but with cognitive and behavioral therapy regained most of it back early on - within 6 months.

I think it's your standard serotonin uptake assist mechanism in
Aricept. Since then, I have stayed on it because my husband says I am too volatile emotionally without it. Before the injury, I was very laid back. So, it keeps me in check. Would I rather get off it: yes!
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If your brother is reporting that he sees your mom distressed, then I would definitely see what medications that might bring her relief. To me, mental anguish should be treated no less seriously than physical pain. If she felt better, she might be more inclined to participate in activities as well.
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To jeannegibbs: No, they have not officially discussed depression or diagnosed depression. They ascribed her early symptoms to a "settling in" phase that lasts 2-3 months. Her English is marginal, anyway, so communication sometimes falters.

Really, the impetus was that my brother was extremely pained by seeing her so distressed initially, and since I have always been honest about my using Aricept he thought he would ask the psychiatrist for it. BTW, I have found that such honesty often backfires. People that I have told about my MBI symptoms and "mild" dementia - not intellectual BTW (more losing focus at times), soon adopt the concept & run off with it and start treating you differently with condescension. In retrospect, I wish I had not told so many people.

The funny thing is that in the last year I have become the most lucid & acute & creative than I have ever been incl. college days. Rather than Aricept, which I've been on for almost a decade, I ascribe it to the healing properties of the Island Life -- the Aloha Spirit prevalent here and finally de-stressing to the max.....
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