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I had taken a can of Febreeze to my mom's room. She uses the bathroom constantly and doesn't want me to turn on the air conditioner. The Febreeze makes my visiting a bit more comfortable. Yesterday evening one of the LPN's came into my mom's room and said she was borrowing her Febreeze. She never returned it and today when I visited it was gone. I complained to the nurses station and to the head nurse. I then asked that she call the LPN and asked what she did with it. She replied that she returned it to the room. She said she would find it when she came in at 5:00 pm.

I know this is a small thing but it made my visiting much more tolerable. Plus, I don't think anything should be removed from a patients room. My mom is paying $253 per day out of pocket. Therefore, a $4 can of Febreeze is money added. I don't want to over react but I'd like your thoughts.

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Golf you did not call the nurse at home the staff did. I took bug spray into my husband one time because-they had bugs and we were scolded for having an arosl can in the room. You are going to apolagize to the nurse so that is fine-nurses are familiar with families and some do get upset needsely and puting her name on her belongings is a good idea especially clothes and electronics.
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Awe, golfgirl - you are so great. We all get stressed; and especially at times at the facility. Glad you mentioned the Fabreze; I'm usually so preoccupied I forget to bring some. Great idea!
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Absolutely all of us make mistakes, especially under stress. To learn from them is the way to salvage some value from the episode. Congratulations!
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I am so glad I posted this question. I have received good feedback and like I said I will apologize to the nurses for overreacting. I should have posted this question prior to calling attention to the missing can of spray. OMG! Am I ever going to learn????

I'm not making excuses for my behavior but (here comes the but) being so stressed and trying so hard to do what's right not to mention watching my mom take herself from wheelchair to bed when she's non-weight bearing, I took my pent up frustrations out where I could!!! Again no excuses! I've learned from this! Time for some humility on my part!

Thanks again ladies for your comments! This website is on my gratitude list! I'm so glad I found you folks.
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Goflgirl, you will be amazed at what becomes missing, lost, taken, who knows. Many times my mother with dementia loses things or misplaces them and always blames the staff. You will find it is uncontrollable and having a close relationship with the staff - priceless. Take care.
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Thanks for the comments! I'm afraid I did overreact about the Febreeze and I feel bad now. I had no problem with her borrowing it but I did expect it to be returned for my purposes. I know the aides have their handsful and I do try to be compassionate with them. I know it's in my best interest to treat them well and honestly I try hard to do that. I hear you Jeannie that it all I have to complain about is an can of aerosal spray, I'm pretty darn lucky. OK here is what I'll do, I'll carry it in my bag from now on and not leave it in her room. Honestly, I just didn't think anyone would run off with a can of spray! Obviously, I've still got a lot to learn. I will apologize to her when I see her! Thanks again folks!
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golf, My mother-in-law has landed back in a nursing home/rehab for yet another broken hip. I have seen enough diarrhea to last me a lifetime, and all the smells that go with it. After gagging enough times, I finally bought one of those Renuzit pop up things that you adjust how much smell you want. It's still in her room 2 weeks later at this point. I did think about getting a aerosol can of smelly good stuff, but I just figured that would be too easy for someone to walk off with. Looks like I was right, since your can is missing.
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I think you are over-reacting. If that is the most serious issue you have to deal with at that care center, you and your mother should both celebrate.

For the next can you buy, place a large label on it, PERSON PROPERTY, Room 123.

Lord knows what kind of a situation that LPN was handling that she thought she needed that product enough to run into your mother's room to borrow it. Be glad you weren't in her shoes!

Yes, you are right. Nothing should be removed from Mother's room without her permission, and if she gives her permission it should be returned promptly. You are right, but is this really an issue you are willing to get a reputation as a troublemaker over? Calling the LPN on her time off to find a $4 item instead of waiting until she came in at 5:00 seems over the top to me. You might have asked if there was something on hand that you could borrow for the day.

Let us hope your mother is at this care center a long, long time. Building a good relationship with the staff is in your and her best interests. There are some issues -- many issues, actually -- that may come up and will be worth following up with the head nurse or the DON. This one, in my opinion, isn't in that class.
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