It became too stressful to keep husband at home due to: depression, anxiety, Alzheimer’s, fall risk. Can the nursing home ask him to leave?

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Hello. I have not written on this site in quite a while. My husband was diagnosed with early-stage Alzheimer’s almost 4 years ago. He retired, gave up driving then and his depression and frustration begin to increase. He is a fall risk and has broken a number of bones in his body over the years. He has been on community based Medicaid for 2 years and right now I am working on the application for getting him nursing home Medicaid.


For two years he had part time aides at the house to help him after he fractured his ribs, broke his shoulder etc . Because of his depression which leads to anxiety, frustration and often anger- he can be quite difficult. I enrolled him in an adult day program which lasted for about eight months until he got very annoyed with other people there. He then was home more often and his depression increased. I found him another Adult Day Program which he enjoyed for a few months - he eventually got frustrated with the others there who also had dementia. He refused to return. At home his anger towards me and towards other people was increasing… We have a nurse care manager through the plan he is enrolled in and she was a great help to me and told me that she could help me get him placed if that time ever came to be. About a month ago he was hospitalized because of a serious UTI and very high blood pressure. He has never had High blood pressure in the past.


After a week in the hospital he had to be discharged and was told he could no longer come home. Our nurse care manager was a great help to me and made sure that he was not released to come back to the house. It was a very difficult decision for me because I hated to be the one to tell him he could no longer live at home. Of course he was not too pleased but he ended up in a nursing home about 20 minutes from our home. When he first was admitted he was placed on the dementia floor because of his diagnosis and because of his outbursts and his depression. The social worker there told me when I first met with her If he could keep his emotions under control he could be placed on a different floor and not with severe dementia residents because he was much too alert to be on the Alzheimer’s floor.


He was moved to the second floor of this nursing home 12 days later and he was relieved and somewhat happier. After about two weeks he is starting to get more anxious and started to get upset with caregivers and other residents. Yesterday he had a terrible day and had outbursts and yelled at people and asked someone if they wanted to punch him after having an argument with him. My biggest concern is that I am so afraid that if he keeps having these outbursts and anger towards other people that the nursing home may want to evict him. We haven’t had a meeting about this as yet but I am sure that will be occurring soon.


I have read that nursing homes can ask a resident to leave if they become aggressive or too hard to handle. That is my biggest worry right now. My stress level decreased once he moved out of the house and into a facility but now it is starting to increase again because of the way he is acting and behaving. I do believe his illnesses (cognitive and psychological)are causing these eruptions but it scares me. He has been on Valium and Paxil for OCD, depression and anxiety for many many years. I don’t know if the nursing home doctor would consider another kind of medication but I hope to be able to speak to him soon. Thank you so much for letting me vent

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I always worry that the nursing home will kick mom out. I apologize for her behavior to the staff and have sandwich platters or pizza delivered to thank them.
I asked them directly about her angry outbursts. She bites and scratches when they come to clean her, and is just plain mean sometimes.
That is with her meds from her geriatric psychiatrist.
They told me, it’s ok, not to worry.
Maybe the family is more sensitive to it or the staff
Is used to it and has training to deal with it.
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Reply to yogagirl
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"geriatric psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner in to see him this week. Clearly his meds need adjusting."

THIS!
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Reply to XenaJada
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My dementia Mom fell and ended up in rehab in a N.H. She went a little nuts in there so they took her to a geriatric physiologist and put her in a hospital for a couple of weeks until they they found the right medication for her. Now it is a year later back at home but I am taking her to a neurologist because as her dementia progresses, the same medication is not working anymore. As they change I think the medication they were on needs to change too after awhile. Even though she was wild, the N.H. worked with us to get her help. I know the good N.H. are used to these behaviors. I'm sorry we all have to go through this! I know it is stressful. If you type in "Acting bad in N.H." in the search box on here, you will probably see many posts. Top left side of screen, the 3 bars in the blue. Plus, someone more experienced will come along with more answers! Hang in there. See...Bingo! Barb already did it!
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Reply to BootShopGirl
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Be proactive.

Ask the social worker or your nurse manager if they can get a geriatric psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse practitioner in to see him this week. Clearly his meds need adjusting.

And if they suggest an inpatient geripsych evaluation, that's another good option.

It's good to hear from you, Speech!
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Reply to BarbBrooklyn
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