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Help!!! I was the sole caretaker of my Father for 3.5 years. As difficult as that was, I wanted to make sure my Father was well taken care of in his last days as he was legally separated from his wife of 35 years and living alone. In July 2013, my Father passed away. My role of caretaker transitioned into executor and successor trustee of my Father's trust. Shortly after my Father's death, I was advised by a family friend that my Stepmother had been living with a man for the past 3.5 years. No biggie ... They were legally separated and she has every right to move on with her life! However, she lied about it to myself and my Father for 3.5 years. Eventually my Stepmother shared that her "caretaker" was actually her boyfriend and she was going to marry him. Again, not much I can do about that information! However, a red flag presented itself when I tried to discuss financial findings with my Stepmother and she kept deferring my questions to her new boyfriend. About a month after my Father's death, my Stepmother was checked into a hospital. She passed shortly after. Now I have her boyfriend asking questions about my Father's financial affairs because she made him the executor of her estate!!! I'm furious!!! He is determined to access my Father's retirement and pension with the government. He's been calling our family attorney asking him to represent him in suing me! He has also promised all funds received from my Father's estate/retirement/pension would go to her family which I do not believe! They are buying this story and have stopped giving me information about his financial plans. I truly believe this guy is an opportunist and saw he could come up nicely by attaching himself to my Stepmother.

Has anyone had similar issues arise when trying to handle a decedent's estate?

Any advice is much appreciated!!!

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your lawyer should be protecting you and putting this con artist in his place. legally speaking I don"t think he has any rights except the kitty liter box. Be fully aware of your lawyers actions...you may need a change....luck to you.
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Your mother and her boyfriend knew that it was best to just hang on and hopefully your father would pass away and she would be entitled to her share of the estate. This was no accident, it was planned and they evidentally believed there was enough money there for them to live off of. The thing is she was admitted to the hospital and died one month after your father? Of what, what was her medical condition? Did she have dementia or Alzheimer's? Was she of sound mind to make the decisions she made or was she duped by a man who saw some easy money if he just waited a while. Did they ever marry?

This entire issue sounds horrendous and I have enough problems just dealing with siblings much less having to deal with someone like this. I truly feel for you and I would obtain another attorney.... your attorney cannot represent this guy too it is a conflict of interest!!!

Best Wishes!!!
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Welcome to hell! I am going through the same thing and despite his assurances that he will do the right thing, you are in for one helluva horrible court experience. I am writing a book about this when my case finishes up. Our estate was stripped of 90% of its value and my stepbrother wants that, too. Get legal counsel and insist your case be heard. Good luck!
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OK! TY for clarifying. Yes. You need a decent Lawyer! I feel badly for what you're going through and wish you the best! Call a ruthless Lawyer. Jewish is best!
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Dear Hopeless, You DO need a lawyer who will challenge everything and be nasty. My stepbrother's counsel is exactly like that and that is why my lawyer is like yours and we are losing everything. Keep remembering: It's NOT about the truth. It's about thee MONEY. And the legal fees. When all is said and done, legal fees will get paid but YOU WON'T!
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My stepbrother waited one month past the five-year loopback period before bringing suit to remove me as Trustee citing I had a conflict of interest in the estate because I would inherit if his mother died. You have a fiduciary responsibility to the entire family, not just your mother. We are settling in court, not because I was removed (I was not!) but because the other side will keep appealing until all your funds are used up. Even after agreeing to a 50/50 split, he has appealed for more. He spent the money on himself, to his mother. You need a NASTY lawyer so the other side will give up. This has been a two-year scorched earth legal battle that I hope will end within the next two months. Good luck.
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This guy is a bully. He is hoping to scare and intimidate you into giving him assets that may not belong to him, thinking that you are too stupid not to. The next time he contacts you and/or any of your family, you tell him to have his attorney contact your attorney; anything else and you will call the police. Don't believe another word he says - tell him to talk to your lawyer and quit HARASSING you and your family. And get an attorney that will work for you.
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Avcidy .... My attorney seems extremely non challenging when it comes to my situation. I'm very concerned that I need to possibly change and get a new one that is more enthused about protecting my families assets! Thanks for the suggestion!
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Light Healer .... Her boyfriend is the executor and successor trustee of my stepmother's trust. My cousins have been around this guy and he sends them through the run around .... He isn't giving them many of her belonging much less anything of value. He's not of good character .... Its been confirmed!
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Please do keep us posted Igloo572. My father left the house to his children after his wife (my stepmother) died. She is still living although her son moved her to a nursing home and then sued me for having a conflict of interest because we would inherit after her death or if she CHOSE to move out. The operative word here is CHOSE because she did no such thing. He moved her out. He spent over $400,000 of Dad's money left for her nursing care to buy himself things and then sued us because he said the house was for her although it was not in her name and they kept their finances separately. He told her I put her in the nursing home although I did not even know where she was and she believed him. The only person who can request a full accounting from her POAs is my stepmother and she won't. Stepbro said he would never give up; even if we won in court, he would appeal and appeal and appeal all the way to Superior Court. At that point, I settled for half the estate and he is now trying to get more. In the meantime, he put her on TITLE 19 and he will take this new half of the house sale and spend it on himself. I want to ask the court to make sure an attorney is appointed to oversee this money. He will fight that, too. The estate is now worth 1/10th of what it was and my father never intended to disinherit his children. BTW--All of my stepmother's money went to her children AND her house was signed over to one of them already. I hope someone can tell me if I can get stepmom's half of the house assets put into a supervised account--otherwise this was truly all for nothing. BTW--his attorney demanded (as part of the settlement) that I receive no executrix fees or travel or gas or tolls or food to come to a different state to settle all this. Nice guys finish last and nice executrixes don't even finish.
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