Is this dementia?

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have a question about my MIL. in recent years she has become increasingly forgetful misplacing things and asking the same questions over and over. It started in about 2007 where i noticed it getting worse. In 2008 she lost it and was thinking people were aliens and out to get her and all sorts of weird stuff she was hospitalized because we didnt know what was wrong with her. They said she had a vitamin b 12 deficiency and was told to take b 12 supplements which she did whenever she remembered not regularly like she was supposed to. I had her tested again for a b12 deficiency in 2012 which they said she was a little low my husband and i then made sure she took the b12 every day but memory didnt improve like it had previously. In November of 2012 she was diagnosed with cancer. she underwent 6 weeks of radiation and 2 weeks of chemo therapy all the while she had no clue what was going on with her health she kept asking the same questions over and over. she was hospitalized after her treatments were over because she would not eat or drink anything. She was losing weight and dehydrated critically low on potassium Magnesium and other vitamins the body needs. she was in the hospital for 2 weeks at which time she developed delirium which was really bad. she didnt know where she was most of the time. They had her see a Psychiatrist who told us she most likely has dementia and for us to have her checked out. I forgot to mention that right before she started her cancer treatments her home burnt down she had left a pan on the stove and forgot about it. she was in the hospital for 2 weeks at which time they got all of her levels where they should be and sent her home she is staying with us.When she got home she didnt know where she was kept asking the same questions and talking about things that didnt even make sense. they gave her rispidol in the hospital and a prescription for home until we could get her in to see a memory dr. also while she was i the hospital they checked her b12 levels which were fine. when she was home she woudnt take her meds wouldnt eat or drink and was using the floor as a bathroom and pooping all over in her bed in her pants and she didnt even know it. She got bad again and we took her back to the hospital they got all her levels up again put in a feeding tube for nutrition and sent her home. Now that she is home again she has good days and bad days we feed her through the tube daily and give her fluids she eats a little bit better than she used to and takes her meds but is still confused a lot of the time. She forgets recently learned things all the time and repeats herself she gets lost in the house sometimes trying to find her way back to her bedroom. other days she is perfectly fine and seems like herself again. She has also again started playing games on pogp on her computer like she used to. she isnt as fast at them as she used to be but she can still do the word games which surprises me. Can someone with dementia play these sorts of games and do well with them. Does this sound like dementia to anyone or do you think it is something else? I am bit confused please help sorry this is so long

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I think her anger last night all stems from her realizing that she is forgetting things and is becoming dependent on us and she does not want that which I can understand. She had a real meltdown later on in the evening when we went to talk to her to find out why she was so angry. she was in her room looking for her clothes the ones she lost in the fire and my husband said all of those things were lost in the fire and she said what fire so he told her and she started crying hysterically saying she didnt remember it. She has remembered it in days past so not sure why she couldnt last night. Then she asked about her son that died of a stroke in 2010 and we told her and she cried even harder saying she couldnt remember that either, she kept repeating over and over why cant i remember. i asked her a few things about the very recent past, like last weekend and she didnt remember anything which upset her more. I told her we would take her to the dr and find out what is going on with her memory and she agreed however her appointment isnt until july 22 so by that time she may not be so agreeable. This has been so hard on my husband last night her broke down too and cried saying there is nothing he can do to help her. I tried to comfort him but i know this must be very hard on him seeing her this way and can do nothing about it.
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Mine has not been officially diagnosed because she refuses to go to a neurologist. She said that she doesn't want to know and they couldn't do anything anyway. So we go back and forth. Sometime she acts like she has textbook dementia, then other times it is like she is old, but no more than that. It is crazy making. My mother does not have restlessness -- quite the opposite. She can sit and watch TV for hours. With mine it is just memory loss, disorientation, and absolute confusion
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yes i think that way sometimes myself. Tonight has been bad she is in a horrible mood slamming doors telling us we are rude and we arent even doing anything. we were sitting at the table eating dinner and she comes out of the bathroom and looks at us then mumbles something and goes back in and slams the door. I think she is still upset because we told her she needed to take a shower earlier. She hasnt had one in 4 days and she smells of urine. She would never take one if we didnt tell her to but tonight she refused and I think that is what she is still mad about. Sometimes it can be so frustrating trying to figure out her mind set. Im really looking forward to her going to this memory care clinic and getting checked out that way we know what we are dealing with. Has your mother been diagnosed with dementia jessica? The other things she does is she will not sit still for 5 min she wanders back and forth from the living room to the kitchen and when she gets to the kitchen she will just stand there and look around and then back to the living room she will go for another few minutes before she does it again I will ask her are you wanting something and she will say she dont know.
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That sounds so much like what happens with my mother. Some days she seems almost normal, then she goes into memory loss and confusion again. I thought maybe it was anxiety or that she was taking too many pain pills. There doesn't seem to be any logic to it. The past two days have been bad. It is like she is out wandering in left field in her mind. This was after a few good days. It can get so confusing. It seems like if it was really dementia that it wouldn't come and go like this.
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thanks for your answer yes they did check for UTIs and she had none. I have an appointment for with with a memory disorder clinic but they cant get her in until july 22 so i guess we wont know anything until then. the weird thing to me is how it comes and goes. one day she can use the microwave another she does not have a clue.
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worriedsick, it certainly does sound like dementia to me. I wondered if in her worst times if her doctors had checked her for a urinary tract infection (UTI). UTIs can certainly cause bizarre behaviors in the elderly.

Have you taken her to see a neurologist? A neurologist may be able to give you some more concrete answers and information about what to expect. Living with someone with dementia can be challenging. I know there are no easy answers. Sometimes the best we can do is get a team working on our side so we can map out the best course for the care of our loved one.

Hugs to you ((((worriedsick123)))). I wish it could be easier for you.
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