Is this all there is to life?

Hey Everyone,

It's been a few days, they've been hectic. I was at the hospital for about 28 hours the other day. My dad was admitted because his oral antibiotics weren't taking care of an infection in his leg.

So, they have him on antibiotics and we're seeing how that goes. He seems to be doing better, but his leg isn't. They told us he could be there about a week. So hopefully, it's okay. The nurses all seemed nice and like they'd be of great help to him.

Things at home have been pretty calm. My siblings pretty much ignore me and watch TV. So, I guess that's better than usual.

I'm having a lot of trouble in school, my grades are dropping and I'm having to turn incomplete work so that I can move on with my lessons and get caught up. I know I shouldn't settle for anything other than my best work - but I can't. Not this time.

I do have a plan though, if I can complete all my lessons and get the credit, my teacher would put me in Credit recovery classes in the summer, which would give me eight credits, and then I'd only have to do one of the semesters for next year, then I'd be all caught up. So I'm excited about that, I just have to check with my dad - of course.

I feel really guilty though, I'm getting my work done, sleeping at a reasonable hour and for a reasonable time, my binges with food has been less, and I'm more relaxed since he's been in the hospital (we're on day 3, I believe). I feel bad, because this is what it takes for me to get some relief? Him to be sick enough to have to be hospitalized? I feel gross for evening thinking that, and every time he does go to the ER, I'm secretly hoping they admit him.

Does this make me a bad person? A bad daughter? A hypocrite? Those are all things I fear, but I can't help feeling this way...

I guess for now, that's the 411.
Ana

"Does this make me a bad person? A bad daughter? A hypocrite?"

No not at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It makes you someone who desperately needs a break from this insanity!!!!!!!!!!!!!

With him in the hospital is your opportunity to make the phone call people have been encouraging you to make or go see a school counselor at a public school, but make an appointment first. Why aren't your siblings working on their online school responsibilities instead of watching TV?

Please make that call of make that visit or both!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi ana. I know ive said this before and im sorry for bringing it up again. Im so concerned about your binging. Please reach out to someone or call someone for help. Please. This could kill you. Im not an expert or anything im just someone who has aging parents and i come here for advice, but im also a recovering bulimic. I havent binged in almost 23 years, since i was pregnant with my son and almost lost him because of this awful disease. It takes over your whole body. And it will kill. If for no one else but your family do it for them. I dont want to sound like a broken record ana. These people and i truly care about you. Please reach out for some help. Your in my thoughts and my prayers every day and for as long as you need. Take care of you ana. You deserve so much.

Hi Ana,

I'm sorry to hear your dad has been in the hospital. No, you are not a bad anything, you are a loving daughter who is stressed out, burned out, and needs a break.

It sounds like you have a good plan for making up your credits for school. It's understandable that sometimes you just do what you can do, but keep hanging in there with your classes, and you can do it. I'm glad you've been getting some sleep the past few days.

I'm in agreement with others that have said it might be a good time right now to go ahead and make the call and see about getting some help for you and your family.

You could also talk to your dad's caseworker there at the hospital and explain your situation, that you are not looking to split your family up or anything like that, but just need some help with and for your dad.

Still praying for you and your family. Big hugs your way.

Hi everyone,

To be honest, when I started reading the replies to my last update - they were really overwhelming. I had no idea that someone had to look over my dad's home life, no one has ever even come out.

So, my dad's leg was worse - so they took him into surgery yesterday to drain the infection from the inside. The surgeon told my dad that he may have to stay in a nursing home after this, his wounds were that bad. (Thanks to his caregiver, and I guess me too?)

They are expecting a 6-8 week recovery for his incisions, and we don't know if he's gonna stay in the hospital during that time.

It's a lot to handle, and I'm not sure I'm doing a very good job. All week, we've had takeout. We bring it up to my dad so he has good food to eat (better than hospital food) and then it's easy to take home for ourselves. - I hate it a lot. i hope I'm doing okay. I know I'm being as in charge as usual, but I'm very very busy.

I'm not sure how to go about talking to a caseworker at the hospital?

Also, to the person that had asked,

I only have one grandmother left, and she 1) lives on the other side of the country and 2) doesn't speak to us.

I'm going to see him in a bit, and if anything happens or whatever I'll update you then.

Thank you,
Ana

Hi Ana,

Please don't blame yourself. When germs get deep into the wound, no matter how well taken care of it is, if antibiotics don't kill the germ, often the patient will need surgery. Sometimes despite best efforts, they have to go in and drain it from the inside to keep it from getting down into the bone.

You have been doing a great job. Nothing wrong with takeout, we had takeout here too :)

Your dad probably will need 24 hour nursing care, at least for awhile, but they will take good care of him and it will be some relief to you to not have to worry as much. I'm glad you are taking better care of yourself and hanging in there with your school.

To talk to the caseworker, you can ask the nurse that's on shift there. They could most likely tell you who the case worker or discharge planner is, and can help you get ahold of them.

Keep coming back and let us know how everything goes. Hugs!

Dear Ana,

I truly feel a deep sadness in my heart after reading your updates. Im so sorry Ana, this sucks!!

However I’ll tell you, if there is something I’ve learned in life is that the saying of “everything happens for a reason” is truly on point. And also, there is something good that comes out of every bad experience...if we look for the good.

In this case I think the good that came out of the bad is that although your dad required hospitalization, God willing he will recover, BUT this presents you with a golden opportunity to take an small step to help your family’s situation.

You have the resources right there Ana, at the hospital! talk to someone, explain that you are just looking for information as to how to get help to better handle your home situation and your dad. Give all the details others have recommended here.

I know you’re probably thinking how can you be talking about this when your dad will undergo surgery and he is not doing well!!
But it is exactly because of these circumstances that I think you should do it my dear Ana; this situation is just too much for you, for your dad, your sister, everybody involved!

Plus, let me share this, I have a friend who is in her 60’s and her mother in her 80’s, her mom is generally healthy, the only thing is she doesn’t walk (it was almost a choice! My friend was told that her mom would be better off not walking and using a wheelchair instead to avoid falls). My friend gets at home care everyday, they bathe her, cook for her, clean for her (the mother); in other words, my friend gets a LOT of help, and her mom is not even really sick, just old and at the beginning stages of dementia. My friend is NOT NEAR your situation for many reasons! Yet she is getting a thousand times more help than your family is.
So, I have a feeling there ARE resources that could help your and your dad’s  situation much better!! Please try to find out what those resources are :)

Will be praying (seriously!) for you my friend. And I suggest you do too Ana, pray!  That will strengthen you, give you calm and hope!

Yay! An easy question from Ana :)

You go to the hospital's main reception desk and ask how you would contact their social work team.

Er... That's it!

I feel like I've failed you all. You guys are giving me such amazing help, help I know I need. Help, I know that I should probably take.

You guys take time out of your days, away from your family, away from your - you time.

But, because I'm a literal coward and scared of the least but if confrontation - I can't. I can't take action, I can't do what I know is right.

My dad is probably coming home today, and my anxiety is through the roof. It always is, when he comes home from a long stay away. I just know he's gonna criticize the house, and pick at everything thing. Nothing is gonna be right.

A few years ago, he had been gone close to a month. When he had come back, the first thing he did was criticize the house. Granted I was like 11 and at the time it was my mother's job. But I asked him why he couldn't just be happy to be home, and he said something like he wishes he weren't. It was was really terrible, and I still get anxiety about it.

So, I don't know. I am truly sorry for wasting your guys' time. I feel horrible, I really do. I'm not sure if I'm going to keep updating, there's no use if it will just be a repetitive cycle.

So thank you all for everything. Your advice, kind words, and prayers.

Take care,
Ana

Oh Ana, please don't feel like you have failed us. You are very young, and it is hard to set boundaries even for those who are much older. That's one reason I don't believe children should be tasked with caregiving for adults. Not only because you need the adults to be the ones looking out for you, but because a person your age has no power in the situation, and no experience setting boundaries, especially with authority figures.

We're here to help you, nothing more. We don't have the same expectations of you as we would of a mature adult. Of course you should still update us on your situation. As things change, maybe your opportunities will change as well and you will see a way to make changes that you can't make now. Until then, people still care about you and want to hear from you.

Hi Ana, I second what Carla said. We care about you and definitely do want to hear from you and how you're doing. And still praying for you too.

I know confrontation can be scary, and that's okay. Like Carla said, maybe you'll feel able to make decisions in the coming weeks and months that you don't feel that you can right now. Caregiving is a growth and change process for anyone, and especially someone your age. You are braver than you think, and stronger than you feel, and you are growing and learning.

We are all pulling for you, and you can come on here anytime even if you just need to vent, and you will not be letting anyone down.

I don't know if you have seen the Star Wars movies, but there is one line that I particularly like, "Do or No Do, There is no Try." Like the Nike commercial says, "Just do it" Being stuck in your fears will only make the darkness that you live in even worse. Courage is not the absence of fear, but the choice to move forward despite feeling afraid.

Ana, people here really like to hear from you, and they want to try to make things better. Many people on this site are stuck at home (you can guess why), and the site gives them an insight into other lives as well as a feeling that sometimes they can help with sympathy if nothing else. Stay with us all just so long as it gives anything to you. When you are old and grey you should have plenty of time to give back to other people.

Ana,

I’ve been thinking about what to say to you, because I don’t want you to feel pressured at all, at least not by us.

I’ll tell you why I have suggested that you call or talk in person to someone at the hospital. I’m afraid that you are thinking that the way out of the situation you’re living is to save at least $5k and leave your house when you are of age; the issue I see is that I’m almost 100% sure that this plan is not your TRUE way out, plus I’m very concerned as to what can happen between now and that day.

See Ana, having been almost the mother figure in your household, even a to your dad, who by the way, is deeply depressed -I think we all can tell-, your sense of responsibility and your closeness to your family is such, that I think when and if you actually get to leave you’ll be burdened with a huge amount of guilt that will not let you really free yourself; and that guilt may follow you for a long time, if not forever, and leave a mark in your heart and in your mind that will seriously impact your future.

And that is not mentioning that I’m afraid that because of your dad’s condition and the entire situation in your home, you won’t be able to really leave; everyone there depends physically and emotionally on you, at least that’s how I think you see it.

Personally I struggle tremendously with guilt, oh yes! I know about all the damage it causes. And guilt is a very good friend of depression (which I’m afraid you already suffer from Ana, and you’ve more than enough reasons!). So I really would hate to see your life permanently affected by guilt and/or depression.

I, from my heart, feel that if you tried to take some steps to help your home situation by at least getting informed (the anonymous phone call would be a great alternative, I think), you would know you tried! And trust yourself Ana, you’re only 16, but you’re very intelligent and very mature. I feel you would know how to lead the conversation towards where you want it to go, and you’d ask the appropriate questions. I really believe you would do great and your family would not be put at risk at all, which I know is your main concern.

Think about what I’m telling you, because even when I more than double your age I still struggle with guilt every day, and know there’s a big difference between leaving a situation knowing that you tried, than leaving not having tried at all to change what needs change, because of fear.

But for now, lift that weight of your shoulders and focus on what you’re handling with your dad’s returning home. Please try to remember that when he says something not nice, it is his depression and frustration talking, nothing else. It’s not easy to remember that specially when you do so much, but try!

A big hug and please, take care of yourself. It is important, specially when we know that if we don’t do it, no one else will. And I’m very glad that your dad is better :)

I am so angry at your father ( and mother) that I could spit nails.

They are holding you hostage with Fear, Obligation and Guilt.

It's bad enough when a narcissistic or mentally ill parent does that to an adult child, but to impose this burden on a youngster, to rob her of her education and the possibility of a future is something past criminal.

Google "Stockholm Syndrome".  And see if your local library has a coy of "Educated" by Tara Westover.

Ana,
Please talk to the hospital social worker - if your dad needs to be in a nursing home for a 6-8 week recovery then he can't come home today

Hi ana. Just wanted to say hi and like everyone else here on this site, we are all thinking positive thoughts for you. Today and always. Dont want you to ever feel pressured to answer any of our questions. You do what you have to do for you, in your time, when you are most comfortfortable. I think we all jjust want to hold you tight and make everything better for you. Your an amazing girl, youll find your way. I pray for that everyday. Take care of you ana. And be safe.

Ana, many people have been encouraging you to reach out, call, visit someone that has been suggested for you to tell your story to for a month. Please do it soon or you will regret never doing it at all.

Some people will drain other's lives down with their demands. They either see it
and do it deliberately or are oblivious. It doesn't matter. The end result is the same.

Ana, of course you're too tired to take action. You're burned out and worried about
negative outcome. You want to keep your sibs from having leave the home. You
care about your dad even though he seems only focused on himself.

You need support, and alot of it. Enough of it so you can feel less burned out. You
could try phone support meetings and skype style classes. I've even used phone
support meetings that i only listened to while I did chores. Just so I wouldn't feel so
isolated when I was exhausted.

And forgive me if this was already suggested, but you can always just take your GED
and go to community college. And a school counselor at a private two year
college might even have suggestions for how you could gain grants and scholarships to
pay for it all.

Catholic social services also might be a good place to contact as well. They often have
resources for multiple areas such as housing, medical care, education, etc.

What you need more than anything is respite. You need a break and a chance to
regroup. Some families will not pitch in to help, not sure why, but know you're not
alone with this. As well as families that seem content staying mired in dysfunction.
It has nothing to do with you. You can't work harder to make it better, unless you
can somehow turn into 3 different people, because I'm guessing that would be what
it would take to change the situation.

If you keep going it can wear you out into illness. You need to reach out when you get
the urge and get some outside help. Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up about
your exhaustion. Hang in there!!!! ((((hugs)))))

I wasn't going to respond to this anymore. I didn't (don't) think that I deserve all of this. I don't even know if I will submit this answer. I'm sorry if I seem ungrateful for all your words, because I don't them into action. I promise I'm not. I'm extremely grateful. You guys are really the only people who have ever listened. Like, truly listened to me.

~ trigger warning ~
Right now, I feel alone. Not just with things that have to do with care giving. It's more. I feel alone when it's 3 am and I can't stop crying and I don't know who go to or what to do. I hurt myself the other night. About 2 weeks ago. I regret deeply. But I still, have the urge to. I have no one to call. Instead the best next thing is to literally talk to the walls. I feel insane. Crazy. I feel like the whole world is purposely giving up on me, and I feel like I'm giving up on it. I mean, I can't even eat right. I go through periods of not eating, and then only eating a few hundred calories a day, and then to wanting to throw up everything. It's a vicious cycle and I can't get out of it. I can't do anything. I can't think right. I can't sleep right. I can't even be a friend right. My best friend is going through a lot, and the other day I vented to her and now she's worried all the time about me. I made things worse for her.

I can't get help. Not yet. I know that's what some of you might reply with. But if I give my dad one more thing to worry about. If I take him back to 2014, when he had to make sure I ate everything and I wasn't running to scale immediately. I don't think I can get through it. I don't think I'd survive it. I know it's scary. It is. I've been there, where I just wanted everything to stop, to stop hurting. To stop giving people something to worry about.

And, I'm so angry with my mom. She signed up for this. I didn't marry a person who thought he was on top of the world. I didn't vow to be there in sickness and death. I didn't bare children who I didn't care for. She did. But she got to leave. She got move on.

My brother is angry, he's a silent-violent angry though. He keeps to himself but lashes out whenever he wants. I'm scared he'll be in jail before his 15th birthday. I'm scared I'll be sitting hospital next to him after he overdoses on some street drug.

My sister, is very angry. She's loud and also violent - almost hateful at times. She says really mean things. She doesn't how they make me feel. She doesn't understand that I have no one - but she does. I don't know how to tell her that and make her understand. I don't want her to.

Somehow, at 12 years old I became the parent of two children with anger issues. Somehow I got stuck between their anger and sadness and my dad's. But I don't have that. I don't lash out. It's make me mad at myself because what is wrong with me. What is so wrong with me, that I don't get angry enough to tell people how I feel. Or the anger and sadness I have I put on myself.

The thing is, is I know that this isn't my responsibility. I wish at 12 years old I would've just hid. I would've told the judge how hard my dad's care was gonna be. But I can't leave. There's no way out. At least not one where I get to win. Where I get to live. Live the life I want.

It's a hopeless road I'm on. I don't know how to accept that.

~ trigger warning over ~

I didn't want to end this on a bad note. So I'm ending it with a few victories. I guess. they don't feel all that grand. But I'm taking what I can get.

So first off, I was able to to turn in all my lessons with fairly good grades. I start summer school in a few weeks. I also went back to work. 5:30 am to 9 am. I also walk home now, so I get about about an hour to myself.

My dad came home. He has severe wounds because of the surgery. But they are healing pretty quickly. So, he's in good health.

That's really it. Unless there's something else. It's been a bit of a blur.

So, thanks for reading this, I guess.
Ana.

Given the choice you have made after two months, you have answered your own question. Yes, this is all there is to your life. I wish you had decided to make a different choice.

As time moves on, it will be much harder to choose differently. I pity you.

Hi Ana, I'm glad you keep coming back here and let us know how you're doing. I've thought of you and your situation often, and am still praying for you that things get better.

I'm sad to hear that you've been hurting yourself. It sounds like the reason you don't lash out in anger is that you turn your anger and pain inward and take it out on yourself. I can speak from experience because there have been times in my life when I used unhealthy coping mechanisms to deal with my anger toward growing up in family dysfunction and just life in general. But over time, God showed me that I am loved tremendously by Him, and that I'm worth loving by myself and others as well. He doesn't make mistakes. You are a beautiful child of God, Ana, and I hope you can find it in you to be kind to yourself. You deserve that and so much more, sweet girl.

I know it seems like you're in a hopeless situation right now, and that it's hard at the moment to find the strength to try and change it, but I pray that eventually you will be able to take that first step.

In the meantime, please do come back and talk to us. We care about you, and you are not alone. We want to be here to listen and support you however we can. (((HUGS)))

Famed quote is that the definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing and expect a different result. You’re sadly stuck on a merry go round of doing the same thing and unless you choose something different it will just keep spinning and you’ll have no life at all. When life is as miserable as you describe why can’t you take the step of changing it? Your parents have failed you, sorry that’s the case, but it’s on you to change this and get off the merry go round. A group of strangers here seem to want a better life for you than you’re willing to reach out for yourself, I hope that will change

CMag! The girl is sixteen years old! Blimey, it's not over yet!

Ana, I wish I knew you and your family. For two pins I'd be in there meddling for all I was worth.

It slightly depresses me, though it doesn't surprise me, that the people in your neighbourhood who see you all coming and going... why aren't they speaking up? Isn't anybody looking? Or are they just determined not to see?

Doesn't matter. People mind their own business. They're entitled to, it's just not always very endearing.

When you are sixteen, time stretches ahead forever. What is real now is, you assume, what will always be.

When you are twice that, say thirty two then, it moves twice as fast.

When you are really old like me, the years are travelling so quickly that you lose track not of months or years but of decades. If I think "ten years ago" I tend to mean the late nineties. The realisation that ten years ago was actually 2008 makes me jump out of my skin.

What I'm getting at is that, although to you they stretch into the distance, your next two years = 104 weeks = 728 days. Minus Sundays, that's 624 working days. Well, it's sixty days ago that you joined the forum. You see what I mean? These two years are only two years. This part of your life will be over terrifyingly fast. But what you do with it could be of immeasurable value to you.

So. Your Dad is home. You are taking on too much responsibility. You think this is a hopeless road you are on.

Well my dearest girl, for one thing the answer to that lies in your own hands. Pick up the phone with them! - just for one easy example.

For another, that road has junctions and turnings too numerous to count. When you come to them, choose carefully. Choose what's healthy for you.

For another, you are going to summer school, you have managed to put some good work together recently, you have gainful employment. These are all promising things. Hopeful things. The road you are on is an extremely rough one, at least for now, but it is not remotely hopeless.

I don't want to guess about a subject you haven't shared, I respect that it's private and perhaps painful. But from what you have posted just now, you really do need to talk to a *trained* *counsellor* about your mother. There is anger and there is trauma in what you have said. They won't heal themselves.

By coincidence, I was listening this morning to a radio programme about brain changes in people aged 16-25 - particularly important to you, this being the phase you are about to embark on. The habits and beliefs you embed now will stay with you for the rest of your life. Paying attention to this means that you have an opportunity to establish *good* habits and *fair* beliefs, at exactly the moment when your brain is at its most able to respond to them. Synapse pruning was one particular topic, in relation to whether you are training yourself more to be alert to opportunities, or fearful of threats. Clue: you want to be alert to opportunities. Being fearful, in a world with comparatively few lions at large, just stresses you out needlessly.

Make a decision to make your life a good one, and let that inform your choices. Do not passively accept that the decisions other people have made - and you do not have to judge them harshly to acknowledge the impact they have had - will ruin your life. Those decisions have been very hard on you; but that doesn't make you helpless to help yourself.

What you don't yet have, although you soon will, is responsibility for your own wellbeing. You are not responsible for your family's situation, nor for your father's care, nor for the difficulties you have faced in accessing education and support. You are a child - bet you love hearing that! - and other people are still responsible for your welfare.

Those other people, all of them to a greater or lesser extent, have let you down. But one thing you can do to make them step up is *communicate.* Express your needs. Tell the truth about how you feel.

TALK.

And work hard at summer school. That's your foundation you're building, make the most of it.

Ana, im so glad that you came back here and let us know how youve been doing. Im so sad to hear the struggle inside of you. I know how hard it must feel that you feel theres no one you can turn to. Trust yourself and know that when you are at your lowest if you trust in your higher power, everything will be ok. Just like that song that carrie underwood sang, "jesus take the wheel". If nothing else please keep coming back here and vent all you want. That has to give you a little release and know that there are people on this site who truly care and are only looking out for the best for you. Again, know that im no expert, just someone who comes to this sight for advice on my parents, but ive walked a mile in your shoes and addiction is so hard. But im a survivor and you can be too. Ive been clean for 23 years have the best son in the world, and i trust in gods love for me and i trust he loves you too. So much your going through, im so sorry you feel everyone has let you down. Save yourself and reach out to someone please. My thoughts and prayers are with you ana. As long as you need them. I promise you that. Take care of you. Please.

Ana, I haven't read all of your post so I don't know if you attend a church regularly or if you even have a church that you call yours.

Google "Parish Nurses" for your city/town and then call their contact number. A Parish Nurse (or Faith Community Nurse or Synagogue Nurse) is a registered nurse who is committed to helping and enabling people of the congregation and the community attain, maintain and/or regain the best possible whole person health — wellness of body, mind and spirit—that can be experienced. They are usually volunteers that have an office and office hours in a church setting and might or might not be associated with a hospital organization. They also make home visits similar to that of a Home Health Nurse. The Parish Nurse or Faith Community Nurse could be a source of counseling without having to go to a "professional" counselor. They might also have some ideas of support that you can get without you having to go back to a hospital for not eating or for hurting yourself. I have listed the national website for some of the church denominations, maybe you could email them and ask for the name of a parish nurse in your community.

elpna.org/ (Evangelical Lutheran Parish Nurse Association)

welsnurses.net/default.asp?sec_id=180006935
(The Wisconsin Evangelical Lutheran Synod Nurses Association)

chausa.org/nursing/nursing-overview/resources/parish-nursing-resources
(The Catholic Health Association Faith Community Nurse)

lcms.org/how-we-serve/mercy/health-ministry/parish-nursing
The Lutheran Church—Missouri Synod Parish Nursing

I pray that God will lead you along this difficult journey that you are on. God is HOPE. (Romans 15:13) God is COMFORT. (II Corinthians 1:5) God is WITH YOU. (Isaiah 41:10) God is your STRENGTH. (II Corinthians 12:9) ^^Prayers^^ & {{Hugs}}

Ana,
There are support groups free for those who hurt themselves.
Try the County Mental Health near you.
You don't have to do that to yourself.

For caregivers with the tough love approach, I see that working with some people stuck in distress, once one has established a trusting relationship. Ana is very young, only 16, and it is still early for her to be confronted about any perceived failures on her part, under the circumstances she is experiencing. Imo. She is functioning at a high level, with a job, and summer school. Though time is short for her to help herself, maybe she might feel the sting of rejection in the tough love approach. Something to consider when trying to help this very brave young woman. Imo.

Thank you "send help". Very wise words.

Hi Ana...this is my first post to you as I wanted to read all the posts. Dear one, you have so much on your shoulders at age 16 but you have shown a strength and resolve that a lot of adults don't have. We all care about you. Don't give up and please don't quit posting.

If you feel like you are at the end of your rope, or feel like hurting yourself, please call 800-273-8255. This number is for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It is for not only suicide but crisis as well and is free and confidential.

This group consists of wonderful caring people. They helped me a great deal when I felt so overwhelmed, was dealing with a rough situation, no one to talk to about it and didn't know which way to turn. Please don't worry about letting anyone down and please keep posting to let us know how you are doing. You are always welcome here.

Sorry Ana....did not clarify on the last paragraph. This group that I mentioned in the last paragraph are the wonderful and caring people here on this forum. Whether a person is just wanting to get things out in the open so you can see it more clearly or looking for advice...they are great.