DH (87) has dementia. Quite severe. Also Parkinsonism and in a wheelchair. I'm very lucky in that I have round-the-clock caregivers who do everything for him. But today he woke with a fever and cough. I acted like a grown-up, called the doctor's office, nurse practitioner saw him right away, ordered cough med, antibiotic, gave us the usual advice you give somebody with an upper respiratory infection. We brought him home, put him in bed, I went and picked up the Rx at the pharmacy, came home, and...I'm just EXHAUSTED--emotionally! I go to a dementia caregivers support group where everyone else is much earlier in the process and they have very difficult problems--financial, legal, family opposition, health problems of their own, angry behavior from their loved ones--in comparison our life is smooth. I'm usually pretty cool, calm and collected. I have so many advantages... Hubby is happy, funny, playful, affectionate, generally healthy. But right now he's sick and I feel so helpless! I feel as if I stopped breathing this morning when the caregiver told me he had a fever, and I haven't yet taken a breath and it's 7 p.m. Just because I have help doesn't mean that this whole trip isn't devastating. And that becomes obvious when he's sick like this.