Is there funding resources for a parent who is the caregiver for their adult disabled son? - AgingCare.com

Is there funding resources for a parent who is the caregiver for their adult disabled son?

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I'm writing this trying to find help for my dad who's my caregiver. Is there any funding resources that I qualify for where I can get funding to pay him for being live in caregiver, transportation to doctor's, etc and everywhere else done by caregiver? Or that'll pay him directly? I'm a 47 year old disabled single father. I'm disabled from several Traumatic Brain Injuries, Chronic Traumatic Encephalopathy, Seizures, Blackouts, Impaired Motor Skills, Impaired Cognitive Skills, Impaired Speech, broken neck, back, and other disabilities. I'm supposed to have someone with me full time because of the seizures, blackouts, weaknesses from minor strokes, and unable to cook, clean, etc. for myself on consistent basis. For the past several years my oldest son (who has ADD, ADHD, PTSD, & Bipolar) that lived with me full time and my dad were my caregivers. I have joint shared legal custody of my youngest two sons who are with me 42%-48% of the time. My oldest son started College & my doctors found out & so my dad is moving in to be my caregiver. I lost everything when I became disabled, my family, my job, my ranch, my businesses, my life savings, all 3 of my son's College Tuition, everything. My oldest son and I had to move in with my dad who was my full time caregiver. And I had to watch as my disabilities caused him to lose everything to. He paid for household expenses, transportation wherever we needed to go, and helped with my other medical expenses which were much more at the time, and that's not including all of the hours of his personal time that was spent taking care of me day and night. For last 4 years since doctors were sure that my oldest son was capable of doing required work, with home health coming in couple times a week, with my dad also coming in during week and providing transportation we've been able to survive. My dad's been spending at least $600-$700 minimum each month to bring me to some of my Specialists. Even though I've been searching, I have been unable to find resources that would either pay him or provide me with funding to pay him. And now that he's going to be my in house full time caregiver again between transportation expenses, daily care expenses, and the hours he works each day helping me survive, stay out of a nursing home, so I can at least spend time with my younger sons and they'll know who there dad is. As said before I've been unable to find any resources just for transportation each month much less for being a full time caregiver. I need help. My disabilities have already cost me and everyone I love everything, and if I had to sit by and watch my dad lose everything again or my son's hurt anymore I won't be able to live with myself. As I said before all of my sons college tuitions had to be spent on my medical expenses so when my oldest son started College this year we've had to struggle trying to find enough money for his tuition. Between Grants and partial scholarships he received we still have $8000-$9000 shortfall that we have to find a way to cover. Then before my next sons I have several years to try to figure out something. Sorry with my brain injuries I got off subject. I have $800-$1000+ in medical expenses each month. There has to be something out there that will either pay my dad directly for expenses to bring me to my Specialists, or provide me with a way to pay him. Likewise there has to be something that will either pay him directly for his expenses and time taking care of me, or provide funding for me to pay him directly. When someone becomes disabled them and their love ones shouldn't have to lose everything they have then and in the future especially when they paid in much more than the required amount. Someone PLEASE point me in the direction of some type of resources that will help me. If there isn't anything out there I hope someone who reads this will fix this situation so that no one else has to suffer through this in the future.

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OP appears to have gone. I would be interested in this as well. Curious whether it was automobile accident?
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Agree CM but it does have a lot of details
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I hesitate, because I almost hope this is a stupid question, but in for a penny: in what circumstances did you suffer this terrible injury and how long ago and how come there was no insurer to resort to? Has that possibility been fully explored?
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While I am sure this would be a last resort, you can apply for Medicaid & find a SNF that is close in distance to your family. That would alleviate the stress on your father & eliminate putting his retirement and well being in jeopardy. That may be your best choice in that you will be looked after 24/7. There are probably no resources available to pay your dad.
That’s a tough decision but I know those SNF’s exist where you can ask to be placed with someone with the same sort of disabilities, ie TBI. You may be able to get some sort of support for your disabilities there and use your great writing skills and ability to articulate to help other residents there. Just a thought. 
Good luck to you!
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Have you applied for state or SSDI, or Medicare/Medicaid?
As above, give your county or State Department of Disability a call to check for resources. Have any retirement 401k to borrow from? hope you can find some help.
State & Federal budgets are so slim these days.
If you qualify for SSDI/Medicaid you can get SNAP and Section 8 housing.
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Hinton, I'm so sorry that you and your family are suffering in this way and hope that you can find some resources to help. You definitely deserve it.
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Do you have a case worker through your local county Department of Disabilities? They should be able to help you access any funding available from the state in which you live.
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