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I live in San Jose ca. Parents require care to live anywhere. Medical has been denied twice, reverse mortgage 3 times different reasons, when I ask my brothers for money or hands on care for mom and dad to pay for their care, I am met with extreme anger to the point of them making up lies and calling the APS with those lies. Is an organization that can help me apply for medical Reverse mortgage? Turn their care over to the state? Need help. I have been caring for parents and grandmother since 1995, 24 hours a day. And when I have ever asked my brothers for help two of them always attack me.

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Matilida, be thankful that your parents were unable to obtain a Reverse Mortgage. Reverse Mortgages should never be used to pay for future debts or caregiving, as one is just trading one debt for a much large debt, the RM.

The RM program is really meant for retirees who have money but want to use some of the equity in their house to purchase stocks to make more money, or use for a vacation, or use to put a child through college. And who can afford to make repayment on the "loan", along with the "interest" and "fees" that are attached to the repayment.

As for Medicaid [which is different from Medicare], make an appointment with an Elder Law Attorney as such attorneys know how to work through the maze called Medicaid. The Attorney can also make recommendations regarding the house, etc. It's well worth the cost.
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A reverse mortgage only makes sense for someone who will stay in their home for a while. It sounds like your parents should sell the house and move into assisted living or senior living of some sort.
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Matilda - your overwhelmed and rightly so.
The big issue to me is WHY have your parents been declined “medical” twice and WHY a reverse mortgage 3 times???
“Medical” I’m assuming is that your referring to actually is Medicaid..... if so they have to all be eligible BOTH
- medically to need skilled nursing care if this is about getting all 3 of them each into a NH
AND
- financially to be impoverished enough for eligibility.
If they all 3 have been denied Medicaid, just what were the reasons?
And what has been done to get those reasons changed?

On the reverse mortgage, those have pretty wide latitude for accepting homes if the homes are fully paid off. If RM is denied it’s probably cause the debt or liens on property too high to meet debt ratio of lender OR the property owner cannot show ability to pay the required homeowner responsibility items like taxes, insurance OR the property has too too much obvious existing / delayed maintenance to warrant lending.
Whichever of the 3 means property is too risky to lend on.

So what’s the backstory on the situation??
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