Can a step-parent who has Power of Attorney and has decided that a biological parent can not stay in the family home, determine that biological children of the parent who is in the memory care facility not speak or see their parent?
When someone is granted POA, it is just that, they are receiving power to make decisions. Ask an attorney to explain the details to you. I listened to a program where an attorney went through what it actually meant. It’s very interesting what it entails.
I would call an attorney. The POA is in place to act as the person would want, not to impose their will on the person. Stopping visitation is not appropriate and makes you wonder what other decisions she is making that might be questionable.
WG, I see below that you say that this is a person in memory care, and that this person is begging to see you, his children by blood? Who is telling you that your Dad is asking to see you? I would consult an elder law attorney. There is clearly a very troubled history with your stepmother. None of us can know what that might be. An attorney may be able to get you in for supervised visits in some way. I have to assume you have already thrown yourself upon the mercy of your stepmother? Have offered to make visits only in her presence? I wish you the best. A sad situation for the elder to be torn between his wife and his children.
When someone grants another their POA, the agent is required to act in the best interest of the principal. I don't think the POA has the authority to restrict visitors. I don't see that as a healthcare issue unless the parents have worded the document that way which is very unlikely. Or if visiting by the children causes some traumatic behavior on the parent's part. Nor do I see the step parent having the authority to evict the bio parent from the family home unless the step parent is the owner.
I would contact an atty to get the issue resolved.
Capable yes. As POA I was asked to make a list of people who could take Mom out of the building. I guess I could have banned people if I felt they would cause strife in Moms life. It would have been in her best interest.
Sometimes POAs go beyond their responsibilities and I think this is one thing. It could be a control thing. If a child causes problems when they visit then the POA has a right to keep that person away.
I realize that ur a biological child. When you visit do you ask questions or complain about how Mom is treated, if so SDad may have been told this and chose to banned u.
I would wonder what his reasoning is. I may also consult with a lawyer on what ur rights are.
The sad thing is that he is asking to speak with us and to see us but my stepmother will not allow it. He has routinely asked, as have my sister and I in a very polite way to please be able to speak with him.
Depends on the specific wording of the document under which authority is granted. To me this seems like overreaching, but it also depends on the condition of the parent in memory care. I'm also kind of surprised that that individual would have granted authority to the step-parent. I assume the other biological parent isn't still living, or is otherwise out of the picture?
I have seen situations like this where the children never accepted the second wife. The marriage was often of long standing but the children abandoned the person UNTIL there was an estate, and the second wife might figure to inherit. Suddenly the biologicals have a whole lot of interest in their parent again. I honestly cannot imagine a person so evil as to keep children from a parent without some reason.
In all probability, yes. If your parent is not suffering dementia, and is asking to see you, then the POA "should" do all they can to carry out the wishes of the person they are acting for; if there is dementia then the POA acts "in the best interest of ....". Sometimes children swoop in to try to make changes to wills and POAs given freely by the person; sometimes, believe it or not, biological children go to war with the wife or husband for control over an elder and his or her finances. If he/she has POA the he/she is the Lion/Lioness at the Gate, and you would do very well to ask to see your parent with supervised visits if that's what it takes. Your parent gave control over things to his or her wife or husband, which is the person they chose most trustworthy in this care. That was their choice. Try to get along in the interest of the one you love. You might contact the Social Worker at the place and explain your position (NOT POA with the POA refusing your being allowed to see your parent). Ask is there is any way you can see your parent. They should know how best to advise you (or an administrator at the facility.) Good luck.
I am afraid that this is the case as he has been told by my stepmother that we do not want contact with him or to see him when we have been trying so hard to just have a few minutes to speak with him.
Best wishes to you.
I would consult an elder law attorney. There is clearly a very troubled history with your stepmother. None of us can know what that might be. An attorney may be able to get you in for supervised visits in some way. I have to assume you have already thrown yourself upon the mercy of your stepmother? Have offered to make visits only in her presence?
I wish you the best. A sad situation for the elder to be torn between his wife and his children.
I would contact an atty to get the issue resolved.
Sometimes POAs go beyond their responsibilities and I think this is one thing. It could be a control thing. If a child causes problems when they visit then the POA has a right to keep that person away.
I realize that ur a biological child. When you visit do you ask questions or complain about how Mom is treated, if so SDad may have been told this and chose to banned u.
I would wonder what his reasoning is. I may also consult with a lawyer on what ur rights are.
Sometimes children swoop in to try to make changes to wills and POAs given freely by the person; sometimes, believe it or not, biological children go to war with the wife or husband for control over an elder and his or her finances.
If he/she has POA the he/she is the Lion/Lioness at the Gate, and you would do very well to ask to see your parent with supervised visits if that's what it takes. Your parent gave control over things to his or her wife or husband, which is the person they chose most trustworthy in this care. That was their choice. Try to get along in the interest of the one you love. You might contact the Social Worker at the place and explain your position (NOT POA with the POA refusing your being allowed to see your parent). Ask is there is any way you can see your parent. They should know how best to advise you (or an administrator at the facility.) Good luck.