My dad has been in a nursing home for 2 years. Results of a stroke. In those 2 years the nursing home has lost his watch twice, broken his reclining chair, lost his glasses twice and misplaced his hearing aids for a week and now lost his left hearing aid.

My siblings and I have been very patient with them during all of this.

Right now in order to get his hearing aid replaced I have to call the local VA and make another appointment for dad to have his hearing checked so he can get another pair of hearing aids.

We have talked to the director, asst. director, director of nursing and social worker about all of these losses. Nothing seems to help.

I need suggestions on what else we can try or do to help the situation. The answer they give us is from the nursing home is "We have a lot of new people working" and sometimes they are not careful.

I have thought about moving them to another nursing home but the others are not rated very well.

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Provide a small basket next to your father's chair and give written specific instructions that on all occasions glasses, hearing aids or anything else are removed they must be put in the basket. I fail to understand how a NH can break a recliner chair unless they are doing something which is actually dangerous, and to lose anything as personal belonging to a resident is simply negligent (I can understand the odd sock or whatever but not personal items.) Their attitude to these "happenings" is not acceptable - but it is always possible your father has actually taken them off and put them somewhere.
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Reply to TaylorUK


You're not going to like this.

If that list of items is comprehensive, they're not doing badly. Not compared with some I have heard of.

The frustration and bafflement I *completely* sympathise with. But the "what to do about it"... things like this do get lost. It almost seems to be their mission in life. They roll under beds. They hide down the side of cushions. And in my case, with glasses, I swear they have a mind of their own and they're doing it on purpose.

I don't know if it might just about be possible to get insurance for the high cost items like hearing aids?
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Reply to Countrymouse

At my mother's AL they have credited her account for lost clothing if I provide a receipt for such. I find one that does not have a high amount(receipt). Granted this requires her knowing for sure item is missing which can be iffy. Amazingly sometimes this produces missing item. Also if they have ruined an item in the laundry I am told to produce a receipt for reimbursement. I have only had to do this a couple of times in 3 years. I am sure more has gone missing but I will take what I can get. In her prime my mother lost clothing when giving it out to be laundered. I am suggesting you contact the person in charge and ask for reimbursement. If they are on alert they may tend to lose or destroy less.
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Reply to Riverdale

dee2848, I see from your profile that your Dad has Alzheimer's/Dementia. It is not uncommon for nursing home residents with memory issues to "gift" items to other residents.

As for dropped items, ever notice the underside of a hospital bed? The crisscross of the large legs that hold up the bed? Well, that is where I found my Mom's eye glasses, the glasses were folded up against one of the legs.... I didn't see it until I got a flashlight to search under the bed and was down on my hands and knees.

Chances are more like 100% that my Mom dropped her glasses and somehow they got brushed under the bed. A nursing home would have no reason to lose personal items, or to break anything.

And with hearing-aids, yep they can get wrapped up in a tissue. The cleaning staff isn't going to open up a crumpled tissue, and with hearing aides being as light as they are, one wouldn't feel the weight inside the tissue.

I wonder if hearing aids are still made inside of eye glass frames?

The same issues would be happening in any nursing home or long term care facility. Heavens, missing items can even happen at home.
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Reply to freqflyer

NANNY CAM perhaps is needed especially since a piece of furniture was broken. A stroke doesn't necessarily result in memory loss, which aligns with how the nursing home management answered. Management blamed new staff, which equates to poor training. Is he receiving the care/meds that he needs? If staff are forgetting/ losing things, what else is being forgotten/lost? When you spoke with the daily working staff, what did they say, CNAs are usually very good at knowing which property belongs to whom. I would talk to your dad to formulate solutions, wearing glasses with a chain or strap for the glasses to hang from neck when not in use, for example. We had a resident who kept stuffing his hearing aids into his pockets, whilst claiming they were lost, CNAs + nurses caught on quickly and when he didn't have his aids inside his ears they knew to look inside pockets. Where the aids were found. We also had a different resident who kept misplacing her cell phone. Every time it was lost, she had left it inside her daughters car. So in response her daughter takes the uneeded cell phone and places it inside the daughter's pocket so the cell phone is no longer misplaced... In the end, perhaps talk to your dad and staff to formulate solutions.
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Reply to Screennamed

Reality is that items walk or break & it is probably not staff who is the culprit. Please Try to roll with it and buy replacements as inexpensive as possible and in quantity that you keep & have at the ready for easy replacement. Ask the VA for extra RXs for glasses & hearing aids. If they are on Medicaid, set aside some of their personal needs allowance to be able to buy these.
What is better use of both your & the staffs time & energy.... a missing watch? OR that your elder is getting their medications correctly?

Realize vast majority of the residents at a NH have cognitive issues with some type of dementia. If you go to meals or activities, you’ll see residents take off their glasses to wipe the lenses and they stay on the table; they take off their watch over & over to set the time & inevitably leave the watch off; they take their dentures off for dessert & leave them. Residents go in & out of rooms, there will be a Mr or a Mrs. “happy hands” who wanders in and takes hairbrush and jewelry and pockets them as they think it’s their room & their stuff. Residents take off their hearing aids or dentures and place in Kleenex and eventually they go into the trash bin. Being MIA yearly for a watch, pr. of glasses, a set of hearing aids, 2 pairs of shoes, hair stuff (brushes, pins, scrunchees) is in my experience par for course for a NH or other communal living. For my mom even if stuff was boldly marked or had her initials painted on with bright nail polish it still walked.

As an aside, in his admissions paperwork there likely was a page or paragraph regarding limitations on responsibility for theft. For both my mom & mil, the was an inventory sheet to fill out in detail for clothing, personal items, electronics etc., with a liability disclaimer.
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Reply to igloo572
whaleyf Jun 4, 2019
It use to drive me nuts when I made an afghan for my MIL for her bed. At least once a week I had to go room to room looking for it (especially after laundry was done) and found it every time on someone else's bed. I had her name swed into it (big so easy to see) and it still got returned to the wrong person. When her dementa got too bad for her to enjoy TV anymore I took home the TV I gave her after it ended up in another room. Good thing I had my name engraved on it.
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I think it is a common occurrence and it is up to you to secure the items and/or replace them.

I found even putting my dads name and room number in multiple locations on items didn't stop them from disappearing.

I would find out if technology is such that a gps tracker could be easily added to his hearing aids or get the cheapest ones posted to help him hear.

Frustrating, but it is what it is.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal

I would suggest labeling all of his belongings and if there are items of value , you may want to consider not leaving them there . Maybe replace them them with less valuable items . My mother was in a memory care community and she would misplace her items . Unless your parent is on a one to one eyes on all of the time level of care , the likelihood of things getting lost is real .

Hope this helps .
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Reply to Circleoflife3

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