My dad is about to turn 70. He has type 2 diabetes, HBP, and suffers from incontinence. He still lives at home with my mom, but since she's 23 years younger than him, she still works full time as a nurse and he's always left home alone. He's very social and loquacious by nature so he complaints of being lonely, of having no friends in the area and spends his time on the phone, watching TV, writing on the computer (I've suggested he should write his memoirs to pass time) and going to the library/grocery store/pharmacy.
My brother and I have left home for university few years ago, but since I've found a temp job home, I moved back in with my parents. And I've started noticing things. First: the house smells of urine, everywhere. My father has incontinence, which my mom blames on his laziness. He doesn't shower regularly, his clothes smells because he always leaks, the house furnitures smell too since he's always home. Today I found a luggable loo he tried to hide in the basement which wasn't empty (we live in a one-bathroom duplex and the bathroom's upstairs). When we try to tell him the house smells and he should clean himself up, he gets upset saying we're disrespecting him. Because my mom always works, she doesn't want to deal with it. We won't invite anyone over anymore because it smells so bad.
Also, he hoards, always gets the house in a mess, gets new obsessions every now and then (right now, he focuses on new diets he finds on the Internet) and keeps saying he's going to try to find a job soon (but we all know he doesn't have the health for that). He's a very proud man who's done a lot of for us, who's studied a lot, but he seems to be in denial about his condition and hates when we "monitor" him. I'm worried sick he might have depression or early dementia and I don't know what to do or say to make him feel better and accepting of his age and health.
PS: I've suggested he sees a therapist, but since he's from Africa, he says he and his culture don't believe in therapy. Help.
Right now I am home on what feels like house arrest due to the C-19 virus. My office has closed and we now are working from home but there is hardly anything to do. I feel like my mind is going to mush, and I don't like that feeling as it can become depressing.
You and your Mom need to find Dad something to keep him busy. How about Dad doing a family tree via Ancestry.com? I found it so very fascinating. Bring out old photos and have Dad write who is in the photos on the back for later research.
What about a daily walk around the neighborhood? Just walking with an occasional "good morning" to neighborhoods can be uplifting :)
Of course, it could be that something else is going on, like a vitamin deficiency. That's why a full medical exam would be helpful.