Is my Mom developing Alzheimer's? Please help - AgingCare.com

Is my Mom developing Alzheimer's? Please help

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Hello everyone I'm writing today in desperate need to know weather my 67 year old mom is starting to develop Alzheimer's. She believes that my brother's EX (she hates her) wife is coming into the house and moving things around. She got a new alarm system, she locks up every day, and she believes there are hidden cameras in the house watching and that's how my mother feels she's able to get into the house. Me not knowing or understanding what Alzheimer's was I told her there is no one coming in the house and she still believes things are being moved around. She says to me that my brothers EX wife is moving things around just to let her (my mother) know that she was there. Again I did not think nothing of it. Then one morning came and I forgot to lock the door and she screamed at me and right then that's when I looked up information on Alzheimer's. When I asked her about it she screamed and said she's not crazy. Don't get me wrong, my mom still goes to work, does normal things in the home, and she doesn't forget things. But she somehow believes that someone is coming into the house. I sat her down yesterday and told her my concerns and she said to me that she gets full check ups from her doctors. She still drives and do eventing else well, but she takes care of everything (I'm crying). She's the strongest lady I've ever known and to think that she may be getting ill scares me and sadden's me. She told me the only thing that would make her upset is if we (her sons) believe's that she was crazy. I'm new to understanding changes In age because I myself am very busy, but for the last few days reading about alzimers I started to sit back and watch her. I notice that she sings or hums in house a lot more, she forgot I gave her a glass of water the other night, small things like that. For the past 4 days (crying my eyes out) my mind is going crazy not knowing what to believe because she said she Go's to her doctors to check herself and say she's fine, She has high blood pressure and that's all I know of so far. Also I'm the one she talks to about most times about things that go on In the house, and now I think she thinks I'm no longer the person she can trust (crying). Please understand that my mom is my best friend who i respect and love dearly and it's kinda breaking me down mentally. I'm not sure what's going on. I'm confused. Is this the starting of Alzheimer's? She been locking doors and thinking people are coming in for the past 4 or 5 mounths. Is this something to be concerned about? Please God not my mother ......thank you

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Again bless you all with your feed back. Today was a huge sign that I need to take care of myself in this stressful time. I was at the motor vehicle today and while waiting in line I felt kinda strange as if my body was about to faint. Hopefully I wasent having s heart attack (wow). All of this happening because I fear moms may have s brain problem, am truly that weak? God I hope I did not develop high blood pressure because of this.
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Hi Rich, Sorry to hear of the challenges you feel you may be facing
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Rich, I'm so glad you saw your doctor! High bp comes from many sources. Stress can be a factor but not always. Did you talk to your doc about a yherapist? Taking that step may be just as important as bp meds at this point.
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Well in my case with my mom n law she lived with us I moniterd her meds and I took her to her doc appts and Sat in to listen n explain things to mom .mom had dementia n couldn't hear .mom was a strong lady as well in her day but when she started to show signs we said she needs us to help her though she didn't want us to we told her 2 heads are better than one so that way if doc said something and she didn't remember we would and so she excepted that help .be sure to get at least poa for health care in place just in case
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Again thank you all for your most needed feed back. Today I did go to the doctor and it seems that I now have high blood pressure. Wow, can axiety cause this. Both my mother and my brother take high blood medication. I'm am over weight, but I know it's the feelings I'm having for my mother is what's causing this high blood pressure. I'm now looking into calming myself down. This terrible axiety is making me think the worst. I do need to get myself together and I will. Thank you everyone. I will keep you up to date.
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Rich, you know how when you fly they tell you that in the event of an emergency you are to put on your own air mask first, and then help children or others near you? Well, this is the same situation. Mom seems to be having a problem with paranoia. But before you can help her, you need to get yourself stable. From what your are saying, you are experiencing changes in your own behavior -- crying a lot, being overcome with emotion, insomnia. You deserve help with these issues just because you are a worthwhile unique individual. And also getting help will put you in a better position to help your mother, if it turns out she needs your help.

Please see your own doctor, and get a referral to a therapist. Something is just not right here, and the sooner it is addressed, the better for everyone!
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It will get back to Mom, but the good news is that maybe she will get you to the MD and you will get some Ativan to relieve the overwhelming anxiety.
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@sandwish42plus

Thank you for that information. I will look into it. As far as my anxiety, I'm definitely feeling it. Days don't feel the same. I'm getting sleep but not real sleep (I had a bad case of insomnia a few years back)....also today I think I made a big mistake. Today I called a phone number on moms prescription letters to see if can get information on my moms doctor. The lady asked me my concerns and I told her the situation. I started getting emotional while talking to her (wow I cant believe how emotional I am right now). Of course she told me that she can't give out that information, but what got me scared is that she said that she had to note the call in her account. Will this get back go my mom? I feel like a certified detector, which so far I'm failing at. At the same time the lady was very helpfull. I'm now having these images in my head of me losing her. My family not having her around. She keeps everything evened out. She told Me that she's strong, I know she is. Again thanks all
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I learned something today - about docs being open on Sundays in some areas.

Rich2015 - caring for an elder is a marathon, not a sprint. You are going to need to rely on anxiety-reducing tools for the long haul.

I hope you and your family can use this as an entry point to have the conversations about who has which powers for your mom (Powers of Attorney), and what her wishes are if she is incapacitated. Her decisions need to be memorialized and legalized in an Advanced Directives/Health Care Directives document. Having this part done will probably help you feel more calm.

Keep a journal of everthing she tells you and that you see for yourself. Journal, journal, journal. If she's like a lot of women, there will be an excuse for everything and a trend can't emerge unless somebody is looking at the whole picture over time. Ask her what she ate today, what did she do, who did she see.

I started to notice that my mom was telling me the same thing every time. She had a scripted story for herself to keep everybody out of her business and cover up her decline. My mom's decline started about 15-18 years ago. She's turning 78 this summer.

Bills got too hard to pay, repairs too hard to handle. She became more & more isolated and made it sound like it was by choice because she didn't want to be around people to catch the flu, or the people at church picked on her, or the clerk at the pharmacy was rude, or this, that, & the other excuse. "I won't..." was reallly "I can't...." and we all missed it.

Hopefully the test results come back with something simple and easy to remedy. I hope this episode can produce something good for the family.
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@sandwish42plus

My mom seems fine as far as always getting up in time, keeping clean, she moves around back and forth to work and Is in great shape for s 67 year old. She just brought a new car. Also yes I do live in the NY NJ area. But the way she left the house yesterday felt weird. When she got in she told me that they took her blood and will send it to her doctor. She speaks with other family members over the phone and have debates with others and she seems fine speaking with others. Yes I have job issues as well and I worry a lot. I have things in my life going on that I need to tackle. I'm feeling a bit more calm. I will try and find her doctors because now I feel like she's hiding something from me. Am I crazy for wanting to find her doctors information lol. I just hope she's not in danger. Thanks all here. This is helping me in so many ways. I keep you posted
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