My grandfather (85) had a fall a few months ago and fractured his hip. So, naturally, he's been declining since and now needs very intimate care that he's only comfortable with a male doing, so he now has a male caregiver there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. That doesn't bother me, considering the kind of care he now needs. My grandmother's (also 85) care needs have also increased, though not as much as his have. When my dad has gone there, her caregivers used to be able to go home, but recently when he was visiting, she fell in the bathroom and was down for over an hour, so he said her caregiver now needs to be there at all hours regardless of if anyone else is there. This is making me less comfortable in their house. Of course I will still visit them, but part of me feels like I'd be more comfortable now staying at a hotel because of the constant caregiver presence.
BTW my dad also told me that if my grandparents are both still around by our annual summer vacation (their doctor thinks my grandfather may not be around another 6 months), he'll bring BOTH caregivers. I told him if that's the case, I'm either staying with one of my uncles (they always rent separate houses) or at a hotel. Last year, the only care that was needed was for a wound specialist to come daily to change my grandmother's bandages. But apparently, she didn't do a good job, and my grandmother needs more care than one of the family members can manage.
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/my-awkwardness-about-visiting-my-grandparents-because-of-them-now-having-247-care-472115.htm?orderby=recent
I personally do not understand why you are so against these caregivers who are there to HELP your grandparents with all of their needs! Why are you acting like this is YOUR problem when it isn't? If you don't feel 'comfortable' being around these caregivers, then don't visit your grandparents who are old, fragile and in NEED of having these caregivers! It's THEIR house, their rules, right?
It honestly makes no sense why you're kicking up such a fuss about a matter that's a necessity for these people you care about. If you plan to spoil the annual vacation over the fact that these caregivers are going along to HELP your grandparents, then stay home. That's my suggestion.
It sounds like a recipe for disaster. Leave the elderly couple home with their caregivers, and go enjoy your summer vacation unencumbered. That’s my take on the situation.
but caregivers have no reason to "invade" you space. If you are visiting and have a room there is no reason for them to enter your room, if you are using the bathroom, you close and lock the door so that no one enters.
I think by not staying with your grandparents you will miss out on much of the visit. Part of who and what they are now is with the life of a caregiver.
Side comment here though I can see this post from another point of view.... maybe like this....
I am one of 2 caregivers for a lovely couple. Their grandson is going to come for a visit and when he visits he completely disrupts our schedule. And we end up doing more work, we have to clean more, cook more and do more laundry. It would be nice if he helped out a bit by not making more work for us or asked if there was anything he would do to help.
You make your choice in where you stay.
Your grandparents are who they have always been.
Get to know the caregivers, I am sure they know all about you.
That being said, and knowing that this could go on for a long time, maybe move out. You don't mention other circumstances of why you're there, and it's none of anyone else's business, but the only person you can control is you. Either make peace with the situation or move on. There really isn't another choice UNLESS you can convince your father that your grandparents might be better off in a good care facility. FYI if they are paying for 24/7 care for 2 people this is way more money than being in a good facility. Plus, they would have more socialization with other residents and staff, and your father would have much less management to oversee. If your grandparents have a fear of facilities, or your father thinks they are terrible, he should go visit some of the newer ones with good reputations. They are not the nasty places of olden days (although some of those still definitely exist). My MIL is in an excellent one on a beautiful lake and even though she's in a wheelchair they take her to llama farms, out on their pontoon boat fishing, enjoy visiting pets and musicians, clubs, events, holiday celebrations... just a thought that cloistering your grandparents in their home may "seem" like the best or loving solution but may not actually be.