My problems are my husband and I want to move next year. We’re retiring and we’re moving where my daughter lives near the ocean. I will help with her but she needs to move to the same city but cost of living is a little higher. Living in the same house would make us both crazy so she needs a house or an apartment. She gets extremely stressed over little things so this will be major. What if she says no? If she says yes, she wants exactly what she wants when she wants it no matter how unreasonable it is. Example: building an 800 sq ft house in my yard. She’s incredibly stubborn and no patience at all and often tells me what I think and how I feel regardless of what I say. I feel awful but it’s not a good idea to live in the same house and that’s not her preference but she thinks if she pays for it, she can add to my house or build one and I don’t want to be stuck with either and seriously doubt zoning would allow it. As she ages, she’s become rather critical, has absolutely no patience, everything has to be done that minute, gets very anxious over the simplest of things, she won’t listen to advice much at all, rarely goes to doctor and is the most stubborn person in the entire world! Is this common? She doesn’t have dementia. I just can’t deal with it every day.
I can’t imagine telling her she can’t live with me either and what if the only other option is to stay where I’m at. Do I give up what we want to stay here with her? She has no one here except my brother and she’d never let him do as much as me and it’s always been me. He wouldn’t want to either. I Hate having negative thoughts about her!! I love her but she is so difficult at times. I certainly don’t want her to die but I can’t help but think if she doesn’t have a lot longer maybe we should stay until that happens because it would be so much easier to move without moving her too. But I feel like I’m wishing that and I’m not and I have no way of knowing it’s just the fact that it would be easier without having to find a home for her and sell hers here as well as for us. I could go on and on. I could never just leave her though!