My 98 year old dad passed 2 weeks ago. My husband and I moved in with my parents a month ago to provide end of life care for them both. My mom is 99 and has dementia and anxiety disorder. We didn't think she would live long after my Dad's passing as they were married 73 years. So we were prepared to stay with her and provide comfort during her own last days.
But she has a strong fear of dying which is oddly giving her a will to live. Hospice says she won't be leaving us anytime soon. She goes in and out of remembering my Dad's death which means grieving his loss as if its her first time hearing it....every single day. So sad. I don't know how her heart survives it. She is immobile and fearful of being alone in a room. She must see someone she knows 24/7 or she panics. So my husband and I are moving her in with us so we can at least be in our own home while caring for her.
I'm not sleeping, have nightmares about not being able to find my mom, heart palpitations and chest heaviness and general depression for losing this part of our lives. My husband and I have only been married 4 1/2 years and he has already supported me through the loss of my daughter 4 years ago and now like an angel, he is caring for both my parents with me. We have not had our own joyful life as a couple and I feel stuck having to care for my Mom, as precious and sweet as she is. We promised my dad we would take care of her and she is deathly afraid of being alone in a facility. My sister works full time and cannot share in her care. We hired someone for respite 2 days a week. But I'm still already burned out and depressed.
I know this is temporary and I need to hang in there since there are no other options for her. We do have hospice to help us monitor. Any advice or encouragement or good stories would help me at this point. Thank you.