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As some of you know, I've been having a hard time managing my grandma's health since she started to decline the beginning of January. Normally even on her bad days, she still can talk and not stop talking. She's one of those people where you will stand there for a hour trying to get 1 word in. The past 2 days though, I don't think she's said 10 words. She just lays in bed all day. This morning she threw up, and instead of telling me so I can clean her up and change her bed sheets, she told me she didn't care. She'd rather lay in her puke, than have to get up because she "wasn't up to trying to get up". She is sleeping 20+ hours a day, except when she goes through these episodes where she gets so confused and scared that she forces herself to stay awake for days. She's eating more than she used to, but that's because of an appetite stimulant they put her on. Even with it though, she can't even finish a pudding or fruit cup. We get her those Fruties to go by beech nut, and she can't finish on of them. She's having more trouble swallowing than normal, also. Is becoming withdrawn normal though? I don't know if it's because she's 91, or due to her Alzheimer's and health problems.


I'm not sure what to put this under, so I'm just going with Emotional Wellbeing.

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@careisgiving It's a homecare through out doctors office that was ordered by the hospital after she was discharged. I'm sorry, I should have been more specific.

If you're interested, the whole story is here
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/exhausted-all-options-dont-know-how-much-longer-i-can-handle-being-caregiver-427160.htm
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Your original post didn't state you had already received medical attention before you posted and reads that you are at a loss of what to do.

What do you mean by Homecare? Do mean Hospice which is ordered by her doctor? Is she being seen by a registered nurse every week? This is what happens under hospice care. If she isn't on hospice care then you need to contact the doctor to get her evaluated for this - unless you're wanting all aggressive measures to keep her alive.
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KayKay. It sounds as though gma has started her final journey. She is 91 so everything you describe would be expected. If she is throwing up I would not press food on her, the body does not need it and can't process it. The best thing is to call hospice ASAP you have done all you can for her so just continue to take the excellent care you have been providing and just be there loving her and comforting. Hospice will advise you and help you through this difficult time. If it is too much to get her out of bed don't even try unless she is as light as a feather and you can lift her to a chair while you change sheets etc. She is tired and just wants to be left alone
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Is this Homecare a hospice? If not, do they have a hospice associated with them?If not, call her primary and ask for a hospice evaluation. Hospice is paid by Medicare. They will give u an aide and an RN will see her a few times a week. Her depends will be covered and other things. If ur privately paying the homecare u may not need them with Hospice.
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@KayKay13 - I never even thought for a second that you aren't doing everything possible. Posting here means you're desperate to try just about anything.

One day I went to my Dad and found him sitting in the dark, watching the TV that wasn't on. He hadn't eaten because he didn't know what he wanted to eat.

I knew the time had come to make him leave his home and come live by me. Fortunately we were able to put a mobile home in our front yard and although it took a few months, he did recover and start eating again.
If HomeHealth won't help, it might be time to call in Hospice to have her evaluated. I did that with Dad at the end.

My heart goes out to you. I recently was concerned about my DH for similar reasons but Zoloft and some HealthFood Suppliments pulled him out of his funk.
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@careisgiving Homecare has been out multiple times in the past week, and they just keep saying the best thing to do is to let her sleep. We've done all the doctors and hospitals, and all of that. I'm not neglecting her, I've eliminated all of my options and don't know anywhere else to turn. This has been an ongoing issue, but the withdraw is new. She's really weak and has trouble getting out of bed. It takes it's toll on her.
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Call her doctor now. Tell the doctor that you demand she be assessed immediately. She could be developing an infection or dealing with constipation or it could be just overall downward decline from which there's no recovery. In her current state - her health is in danger and you could be accused of elder neglect if she continues to trend downward. Her doctor, Adult Protection Services, Home Health, Hospice, EMTs all will want to know why you didn't seek medical help from them versus getting casual advice on this forum. No healthy person of sound mind is okay with lying in her vomit. Take a step back and really look at "her". She isn't doing well, she is declining - she needs medical attention ASAP. Call her doctor TODAY.
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Call someone immediately. HomeHealthCare, Hospice - definitely her physician.

Best guess is she needs an anti-anxiety mediation. But you need to make that call.
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