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Millie111, thank you for posting this warning question and the additional background that should scare many of us caregivers into making sure we've done our legal due diligence for our loved ones. My first thought was for you to contact a lawyer, but that's already been done. It's obviously a complex situation and to give a more meaningful answer to your question would require legal training and even more detailed background information. However, one thought that crossed my mind was that if anyone is counting on Medicaid paying for any of your dad's care due to the "order to put him in a home," then, based on the amount of funds his wife has put in her name only, he will be disqualified from Medicaid assistance for several years. Of course, if your dad's monthly retirement benefits are sufficient to cover all of the monthly facility costs, then Medicaid is not an issue. Good luck with resolving this difficult situation for your dad.
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We have filed for conservatorship of him 2 yrs ago. The case is still pending because she is intervening petitioner. He remarried a younger woman about 10 yrs. ago. They had a prenuptial. Before she would marry him (he was 76 she was 58) He had to do a prenup,quitclaim deed,change beneficiaries on his life insurance and several other things. He has a home he built and paid for. He also had money put up for his retirement in savings and annuities. He has a will and gave his son a durable poa. Somehow she had a durable poa done a few yrs ago from an attorney she worked for. His sons poa is still good. The quitclaim deed was deeded back to him for tax reasons and since then 2.5 yrs ago he put property in his sons name with him having a life estate and her one upon his death. She was furious about this even though she did the same for her sons with her 2 properties she owned. So for the last few years she used her poa to go to every bank he banked at and took all of his money. It was over 150,000 just in savings that is not including the money she is still taking out as of now. He has a state retirement,military retirement and ss that goes in the joint bank account and thats all the funds that goes in there she keeps hers in her own account. We found out she was taking every last dime of it either by transfer to her account or to an account with her and her sons name only. When we filed for conservator his son then went to bank and used his poa to open an account and we were able to get two months of his checks then she changed it all back with her poa. He was not appointed a guardian ad litem until 13 mos. after. The guardian found exactly what we were talking about . No she is not spending the money for him at all only very little to help with his care. We are no longer allowed to visit or care for him and just recently she got an order to put him in a home. Now we are hearing from lawyers this is spousal property and that she had a right to it because it was joint account. Also they are saying prenup is no good and wont stand in court because it was done the day before they were married. Where are his rights even though she was on account how can she take all of his money with him with having dementia. We have spent so much money on attorneys and mediation. All this women wants is more money. Now everything is about her and her rights while they strip him of all his civil rights. I just would like to know what else we can do to help him. The only reason she took money is because she is heartless and selfish. She did the same to her own Mother and Brother and also her ex husband.
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Millie111, I see on your profile you are taking care of your Dad. Is it his wife who is taking the money? Who told you this is happening? And anyone ask the spouse why the money was taken? Is it to pay for medical care? Or be transferred to another bank?
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Dear Millie,

This is one of the dangers of having a joint bank account. Either account holder can legally take all the money. I know it hurts. Any joint account requires trust and I know that is sometimes hard to come by.
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