My 83-year-old father hasn't seen a doctor for over 30 years! Is it common for an elderly person to refuse medical care?

Follow
Share
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
19

Answers

Show:
I agree that as long as your dad is in good health there is no need for a doctor. I wish mine was as strong. Some older adults are also set in their ways. If anything changes with him then , I would urge him to go with you tagging along.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

How lucky for your father that you and yours sisters visit him every day. Good for you! Is there some way you could point out to your dad that you pay these regular visits because you all love him so much and that, because you love him so much, you want him to allow you to make an appointment now to go to a doctor WITH him in the new year to see what the shaking is all about. He might still benefit from some medicine the doctor could prescribe or maybe the problem could be corrected with a small operation. Who knows? If your dad knows that his daughters will go with him and that you are a united force, hopefully that will help him face his fear. He will know he won't be dealing with the doctor on his own (and the doctor will know too that here is a man who has family backing him). Good luck and I hope that when you all go to the doctor, you learn good news, not bad. But even if it is bad news, it will be easier for your dad to take if you are all there with him and can have a cry together afterwards. United you will stand.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My father seems to have Parkinson's, but don't know for sure. He is annoyed with the shaking tremors of his head and right hand...but not enough to get checked out! Yes, I do believe fear is a big part of his reason not to go to a Dr...and Yes, he has had bad experiences when he was young...but they seem to be exagerated stories, but Fear is fear. My sisters and I don't want to try to make him do anything he doesn't want to do. We love him dearly and visit him every day.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I saw a bumper sticker on a big RV one time that said, "We're spending our grandchildren's inheritance". Your loved one may not wish to give the American Medical Industry the opportunity to suck his estate dry postponing his death. As long as he avoids going to the doctor, the medical industry has no access to his funds. And at 83, he may be ready for death when it is ready for him. You might discuss his belief system with him to learn why he has taken the stance on this issue that he has.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Thanks for clarifying this, gmbyacht. And I am glad that you are getting on with your life and are happy with the results. Best wishes.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

Ics - just to clarify - this is my step dad-we've called him dad for years. Sorry for the confusion. He's not my real depilated drunk dad that married the gold digger. . I just wanted to respond to the question. And yes, I have gone on with my life and am happy with the family + friends I really have.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

gmbyacht, this must be what attracted the gold digger to your dad. He is a going concern and seems to know what HE wants even if it isn't what YOU want for him. It was interesting to get this new picture of him and after seeing it, I would suggest you quit worrying about him and just get on with your own life. He is doing fine for an 85 year old!!!
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

My dad is 85, He has always hated Dr's. + medications (he takes none!). But he did go, several yrs. back, after pulling his achilles tendon (3 hrs a day of tennis) and he opted for rehab - NO operations. He still plays tennis. Something else was bothering him recently (he is sharp + knows his body) and he ended up being tested positive for prostate cancer - yes he accepted treatments. p.s. he's got a couple more false teeth fr. avoiding the dentist for yrs. He recently had a siatic nerve issue from heavy lawn work.-he saw many Dr's. - with no help, the problem went away with rest. He just gave up smoking after 60+ yrs--Too expensive for him. He is fine and yes, still playing 3 hrs. of tennis a day when someone is available to play with him. Each case is individual.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

I love this refreshing story. Thank you!
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

3seraphim, it sounds like your dad was best off not seeing doctors. Interesting that he thought he knew more than the doctors. Of course he didn't overall but perhaps he felt he knew his own body better than any doctor could. Do you know why he didn't trust doctors? I have a 63 year old sister who no longer has much faith in doctors either. She has had some bad experiences dealing with different types and now stays away from them probably more than she should. But it's her life. She says it's not been a bad life and she claims to be "ready to go" at any time. Different strokes for different folks, as they say.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.