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Resident knows the difference between the two always pick bed bath over shower. Nurses has even asked yet still No for shower. Administrations even asked to be showered still answer is No. Yet to please family member, have CNA shower said resident against their will anyways cause family member always complaining about something.

My husband only takes a shower once a week, on Sunday afternoon. I lay his clean clothes out in the morning. I mention several times during the day that is shower day and show him. Sometimes he resists. I tell him no dinner until after his shower. I just start taking his clothes off starting with his socks. For now, he always gives in. 😁
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Reply to Atlasshrugged
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No, it's not abuse. It's called not stinking to high heaven in order to keep ALL the residents comfortable. Should the desires of one outweigh the comfort of all? I think not. A shower is not the end of the world, so tell this "resident" to take one for the team.
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MiaMoor Jul 5, 2024
My mum doesn't like showers; she feels unsafe and it's uncomfortable for her, bordering on painful. She has a wash every day and doesn't smell.
The resident chooses to have a bed bath - that's good enough.
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I am surprised by the number of people who think that it is both necessary and legal to force an elderly person to have a shower. I'm in the UK, but I bet that laws regarding autonomy and dignity would be the same in America and other countries as they are here

The elderly person has expressed a preference for a bed-bath, which is offered at the facility where they are being looked after. That should be respected, as it is generally sufficient for their health and wellbeing.
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BurntCaregiver Jul 5, 2024
A bedbath is fine instead of a shower. So long as the person is getting washed up and is clean.
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I have a feeling the poster is the resident?
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Reply to pamzimmrrt
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I believe a staff person cannot (legally or otherwise) force a resident to do anything.
Talk to the administrator.
Call APS (Adult Protective Services)

Gena / Touch Matters
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MargaretMcKen Jul 6, 2024
The facility can 'force' the resident to move out.
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Abuse VS Neglect. It gets tricky..

People refuse showers, then refuse bedbaths, refuse repositioning, then refuse having soiled continence products changed.

Allowing a person in your care to stay immobile, unwashed & soiled is neglectful. Yet..
You need concent to proceed.

'Duty of Care VS Dignity of Choice' this conundrum is called.

Sorry I have no easy answer for you. It can use the best skills of the CNAs to offer choices & negotiate. Maybe a little trickery too.
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BurntCaregiver Jul 5, 2024
First of all when a person gets to the point where they refuse to be washed, have their clothes changed, or put on a clean diaper they usually have dementia pretty bad. So it really is not a case of preserving their dignity because really at that point they really don't have any.

It becomes about duty and care. There were many times over the 25 years I was a caregiver where I literally had to force a client into the shower and if not an actual shower, then at least a sponge bath with a clean diaper and clean clothes.

Sometimes a little intimidation was necessary. Believe me, a person recovers a lot easier from a little intimidation then they do from incontinence sores, skin infections, or UTI's.

When you have the consent of whoever is making the decisions for the person, do what you need to do.

I will not leave a person sitting in their own mess or stinking from not washing and wearing filthy clothes. More than a few times where I had 'stubborn' care clients with dementia where I literally had to shove their hand down their diaper and pull up a fistful of sh*t and put it right under their noses to get them compliant with being washed up and changed.

It's all about the caregiver's judgment and being able to triage needs. Getting the soiled diaper changed and some degree of washing up is the higher priority than making a person get up.
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No one should be forced to shower if they are living alone. If they are living in a care facility and there are other people in residence, then yes. Yes, they should be forced to shower or at least to be washed up.

The other people living in the facility and the roommates of these people should not have to live with the disgusting stink of someone who won't wash or wear clean clothes. So, yes they should be forced to shower or at least wash us and wear clean clothes.
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Maybe a legal care plan on their records to record their preference/what needs to be done. They cant force them to do something they don't want to, they need to explore ways to help them feel in control, support their independence, and enable them to be involved. Sounds illegal to me. I would seek legal advice. I am sure there must be something to force them to accept certain care issues. Sounds like they just cant be bothered.
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Iknowmyworth: Perhaps you'll have to get a social worker involved.
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MiaMoor Jul 6, 2024
I completely agree.
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What would be abuse is NOT doing what is necessary to keep the resident clean and free of infection. If the best way to do that is a shower, then the resident gets showered whether they like it or not. The staff can only allow so many "no" answers to showering until they MUST do it, whether the resident wants it or not.
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Reply to mommabeans
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MiaMoor Jul 5, 2024
A bed bath will meet the hygiene needs of a person who isn't particularly active.
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