It all depends on the senior themselves. Some seniors are 55+ and are very active, thus a 55+ community would work well if they are at a point of downsizing because the current house is too big. I've seen seniors in their 90's who are just as active as someone 30 years younger, so they are able to live at home or move to a 55+ complex.
Some seniors have mobile issues or the start of memory issues. If they are still able to do things in the home but want to live in a more senior safe environment there is Independent Living where one can either buy or rent an one or two bedroom apartment. Some apartments are 900 sqft, some apartments can be as large as 3000 sqft. Depends on the complex. Some IL complexes offer "assisted living" options where you can pay extra for extra care.
My Dad was in Independent Living, had a very nice apartment with a full size kitchen... the rent was expensive but it offered weekly housekeeping, linen and towel service, one or all meals in the main dining room, nurse and aides on site if needed, transportation, etc.
Now for Assisted Living, again it depends on the senior and what are the mobility issues and memory issues. My Dad is now in Memory Care [Assisted Living] in the same complex. He lives in a studio apartment but doesn't mind that. In fact, the Staff said those with memory issues prefer a studio apartment as they can see all of their "stuff" from their recliner :)
Assisted Living is for people who need some assistance. It is not for people who are quite capable of living independently. It is not suitable for persons who need considerable assistance with activities of daily living or who need 24 hour medical supervision.
Well I am a senior citizen and do not plan on living anywhere except in my own home/apt. We just moved from Sun City, AZ (a retirement community) to Oceanside, CA, and the vitality of younger & older people biking, walking and being active has been a wonderful boost to my morale! I was at the ocean yesterday and had to climb back up stairs leading to the ocean, they were very steep and about 100 of them. After having packed, unpacked, moved and survived with a mending right wrist which had surgery, I made it up the stairs better than most younger people. I really surprised myself. So, in answer to your question, NO, assisted living is only for those who need help with activities of daily living, have memory impairment, and/or can afford the extraordinary costs. Doing for oneself is beneficial to both the mind and spirit!
I dislike the term senior citizens! Probably because I, by some definitions (55+), I am one. And am, thank goodness, no where close to needing even an independent living apartment. I have downsized, still work, am active and can do everything I need to do for myself.
What is the age of your senior citizen? What services, if any do they need? Does that person want more socialization? Do they have resources to pay for a community that offers what they want and need? Are there medical issues?
Living arrangements are very dependent on the individual. There is not a one size fits all. Some live independently all their lives into their 90's and even longer with services necessary in their homes. There is some policy changes as many cannot afford the amenities provided by communities toward "aging in place". So, in a nutshell.... It depends on the person!
Assisted Living (AL) is the perfect setting for those who can no longer live independently but who want to remain independent. My mother (age 91) has been a resident at an AL facility for almost five years. She has a private suite with a full bath and a large sitting room/bedroom. The daily routine provides her with choices. She is assigned to a dining table with three others and each morning they select their meals for the day from a menu with many choices. She participates in an excercise class and rosary recitation and then goes back to her suite to read the daily newspaper. There are activities and outings throughout the day but she seldom participates chosing to either read (there is a library) or work a puzzle in her suite. However, she does have choices. Everyone, with the exception of a few residents, uses a walker. She has the opportunity to walk indoors or outdoors during the summer months. If she lived independently she wouldn't have the meal selection and the ability to dine with others, nor would she be able to walk as much as she does. She has many choices to make every day which adds to her feeling of being independent yet she is in safe surroundings and assistance is available if she requires it. Many seniors who resist AL do so because they think they are being independent by staying in their homes when clearly the opposite is true as most of them require help with meals, shopping, cleaning etc and they are alone and isolated all day with few choices. The hard part is to find the right AL. Initially, my mother was in an AL where everyone had their own apartment. While they all had their meals in the dining room and there were daily activities, residents tended to stay in their own apartments more. Her current AL has a mix of private and semi private rooms. At first I didn't like the smaller living arrangements but I later observed that as a result the residents were out in the many common areas socializing and making the facility more welcoming and more "alive." I thought that the first facility was more in keeping with what I would prefer and I wasn't looking at the big picture. I'm glad that we made the change to the second facility. My mother functions very well in her current facility and she has independence that she would never have living alone or with me. If she wants to be around other people she can but if she wants to be alone she also has that option. The important thing is that she had choices and options as to how she'll soend her day.
" Many seniors who resist AL do so because they think they are being independent by staying in their homes when clearly the opposite is true as most of them require help with meals, shopping, cleaning etc and they are alone and isolated all day with few choices." So true, and I can see this is exactly what my mother thinks.She will give up driving this month, so she will be isolated in her condo (she only drives within a limited range of her condo as it is, but she chooses when and where she goes). She will expect me to drive her around (currently I'm setting the boundaries of when/where I will go; hasn't been presented to her yet).
She was a very social younger person when she was younger, so I think the increased isolation is going to hasten her decline. It will be Fox News 24/7.
But she refuses to consider any type of senior living. (And I refuse to be her in-home attendant, housecleaner or cook.)
I am definitely a "Senior" at 77 but also as Glad said hate being labeled as such. Already a senior at the age of 58 I rejoined the workforce and held a full time job till age 68. Now I definitely need help and have a housecleaner, plus hubby has help with chores that used to be easy for him. It is also exhausting for me to cook a full meal so it would be a real luxury to be able to wander down to a dining room and make my choices. Personally I would consider assisted living if I could afford it and I was alone. Unfortunately it would be hell on earth living with hubby in a small space. I do still drive but would not consider making long trips unless it was a case of life and death. Never been a social butterfly so would also keep to myself quite a lot but would enjoy the convenience of transport to shops. Being able to keep a small animal would also be important. Some amenities would also be very nice like a swimming pool. it really is all a matter of temperament and I think the wishes of older loved ones should be respected as long as they are in a safe environment and capable.
Some ALs offer large suite or small apartment style accommodations and others are structured more like nursing homes only with less oversight. If I had the financial wherewithal to move to an apartment style home that offered meals and housekeeping as well as companionship, outings and activities I would go tomorrow. (And I'm only in my 50's LOL)
I try to look on the bright (and humorous) side of things. Like the advantages. Senior discounts are great. I laugh over getting carded. I am trying to laugh over the age discrimination, rampant as it is. In Spanish, the word is jubilante, meaning, retiree. I like that. Also, I was called "Señora," if people did not know my name. I found that anyone who was not a "pupil," that is, beyond high school age (identified by school uniform) was called Señora. So there was not a distinction between married and unmarried, nor distinction between elderly and non-elderly. Any adult woman was a Señora.
I think it depends on the retirement community. Some are great, I hear. I know people who love where they are. Like getting to hang out with folks your own age for a change and getting away from the cell phone, texting, and instant everything mentality.
I have to scratch my head whenever I heard my parents say they were living independently in their own house, they were in their 90's. If they were so "independent" why was I so stressed and exhausted doing things for them???
After emptying out my parents house of 72 years of "stuff", I decided it was time for me to start emptying out my own house of items I no longer use, or only use once or twice a year. I have narrowed down the community for my next home, still a single family house, but with a first floor master bedroom [stairs aren't easy as we age], and less square footage... the yards are maintained by the HOA. I know I am not ready to pay the high price of renting an apartment in Independent Living, but I would plan to put my name on a waiting list as those of us early baby boomers are aging. Luckly I am in an area where 55+ and Independent/Assisted/Memory complexes are being built left and right.
I also like the "senior discounts" at the stores :)
You have to consider the individual and their medical history/condition plus their age. Then decide- #1 Living in Place #2 Assisted Living #3 Nursing Home #4 Living with family (I strongly urge AGAINST this).
As others have said, it really depends on the individual and their needs. Anyone with thinking problems related to aging can benefit from a 24 hour support system, and it's better in an AL than at home as long as their needs can't be met at home. (And that in turn depends on the physical & emotional limits of the family.) AL is not the best option for everyone, but it's great for some people!
The blogs of AgingCare are so very helpful, most of the time! However, please be mindful when you post, there are many that can not fit a specific circumstance. I am a Senior, taking care of my dad! He has many health problems, he recently had a cancerous kidney removed and a 6.4 abdominal aneurysm. His health is declining and he has minor dementia, exacerbated by the recent surgeries! The worst part is his mind and memory! He is in an assisted living facility right now because I can not physically or mentally take care of him as he recovers. He has turned into a spoiled brat, demanding I bring him home and constantly being mean to the nurses and other residents. I tried to take care of him at home, but his inconstancy issues were overwhelming to me. But worse is his belief, he is not old and doesn't want to be surrounded by all these old people! He is one of the oldest there! Sometimes, you have to be honest with yourself and recognize, sometimes the family caregiver is not the best option and if they are not fully capable of taking care of themselves, and that means staying alone at times, cooking, cleaning for themselves, they and you need assistance. Whether it is at a facility qualified to take care of them or someone in the home! I love my dad and we have always been close, but I am the only one willing to take care of him in the family and after 9 months, am finally facing the fact, I can not do it! And realizing as close as my dad and I are, he would never do give up his life to care for anyone else! Sometimes, the truth hurts but sometimes you have to face it and admit it!
Zytrhr, in this instance it also depends greatly on the abilities of the person in care. The only AL's that can legally prevent a resident from leaving are those for memory care, with locking doors. That's because of wandering. Regular, non-memory care AL's have officially sanctioned outings, but residents are also free to come and go, for instance via taxi, county senior transportation, or at some places, an on-staff driver who can be paid by the hour to drive them to appointments or to go shopping. If the elders are easily lost or confused, the AL can be instructed to alert family when they want to leave on their own. And they can often be redirected away from the idea of leaving by asking if they want to eat lunch first, etc. If a staff member is available and the elder just wants to go for a walk or something, and there is worry that they'd get lost, the staff member might go with them a short way and then try to persuade them to go back to the building. But an AL cannot actually keep someone in the building against their will. Hope that helps.
Oh I should add, many are also still licensed to drive and perfectly capable of taking themselves wherever they want to go! It all depends on the individual.
I am a very healthy 85year old woman and live in a house of my own (paid for). I am just going into a phase of my life where I will finally be living alone. I am still able to drive and I have help running my house consisting of a gardening person and a house cleaner. I am going to try it out and see how I do. If it is a struggle in any way, I plan on looking into what alternatives are available and moving if anything else seems to be a better choice for me. Perhaps a housekeeper who would also cook my dinner would be a solution. I am sure there are other options. I am very independent, but sensible, and want my family to help me make the right choice when the time comes. Thinking and talking about the choices ahead make it easier for both my family and me. There won't be any family meetings about 'What do we do about Mom".
I work at an AL which also has a memory care unit. Our residents in the AL side are very happy, they have many activity options daily. They are like family to one another and even the staff. We love them like our own grandparents. This is because they truly only need assistance. We do their laundry, provide all meals and two snacks per day. We give their meds or if they prefer, they do their own. Now, Memory Care is totally different. It is pitiful that families dump their memory impaired loved ones, who are always incontinent, if not when they arrive, definitely soon after, off at an assisted living and literally leave them there until they die. As a person declines they should be moved to a full scale nursing home with RNs on staff and machines to lift these people who eventually become bed bound, develop bed sores that never heal, and break the backs of the caregivers. But families NEVER do that. NEVER. It is tragic. It is illegal, but goes on all the time. If your loved one needs full care, take them where they can get it for God's sake. Don't be in denial, no facility with the word ASSISTED in the name is for people who cannot get out of bed, or feed themselves, or stop themselves from screaming uncontrollably for hours on end. And I say all of those hard to hear things out of LOVE for human beings who have worked hard their whole lives and DESERVE better than to be dumped off at a facility who cannot possibly give them the care they NEED and DESERVE.
Memory care is often necessary when their care needs exceed the skills or patience for family or other caregivers. Care in the home is not always ideal, though it would be nice if everybody with dementia had a family member that could provide for the ever increasing care needs. Home care is not feasible many times due to cost. Facilities are often the most cost effective option and the best option. Dementia is a progressive disease and yes the move from home will often cause a decline. Nursing homes for memory care are not warranted until the physical needs align with the dementia symptoms.
Moving a loved one to memory care is not "dumping". Many times it is the ONLY feasible option. When the become uncommunicative, not able to eat or get out of bed is many times when hospice is brought in.
I see both sides of it, Glad - the "dumping" has been going on for decades and still does. Sometimes it's because families or others taking responsibility will just grab the first place they can get, out of desperation, whether it's really suitable or not, and then after that they'd rather not dwell on what might be happening; sometimes it's because people feel happier, irrationally but still, if they're placing their LO in a specialist unit rather than a nursing home which they see starkly as being the end of the line; and in any case there is considerable variability in the quality and competencies of facilities, whatever they're called.
But yes there are souls whose minds have disintegrated inside otherwise healthy bodies, and they do not belong in the highly regimented environment of most Nursing Homes, I agree.
The best facilities I have seen follow care through from simple older age support to full-on nursing for the "elderly, frail and mentally frail" as they used to put it in the olden days (1990s!), providing client-centred care in the truest meaning of the phrase. I'd be happy to name names but I don't think it would go down well, and besides they're UK organisations and no help to AC members - though I'm sure there are US groups which are at least as good. I just wish there were more of them.
Often family who just drop in and visit briefly have no clear idea of how much their parents have declined and their real care needs, this is true whether they live independently or in a facility. In my opinion it is up to the facility management to re evaluated their residents periodically and to set firm boundaries about the care they can offer. Unfortunately some companies focus too much on keeping every space occupied, even offering large bonuses to management based on occupancy. Here there has also been a boom in the building of new, high end ALs so that many older facilities are having difficulty attracting residents, so there is an incentive to hold on to clients who really do need a greater level of care. Add in the fact that there are also long waiting lists for long term care and you end up with a lot of people living, and unfortunately dying, with sub standard care.
Does the person NEED assisted living? There are independent "Retirement Communities" and may have all stags from retirement, assisted to memory care and some to full nursing care. The cost will depend upon the level of care needed. Advantages... No Mortgage..but chances are the current house is probably paid for unless there are second, third or more mortgages. No heating costs No lighting costs No water bill or sewer No garbage pick up bill Minimal food costs Some transportation provided Arranged outings. Being able to pick up and go without having to worry about a vacant looking house Disadvantages You have to let someone know where you are going, signing in and out You are living close to people that you may not like These are just 2 that I can think of now..It would be like me moving back into an apartment not something I want to do..ever again.
So there are advantages and disadvantages Much depend upon what the person needs and wants.
At some point though Assisted or Memory Care might be necessary for the sake of safety. And Assisted Living or Memory Care is probably less expensive in the long run compared to having a live in caregiver or multiple caregivers 24/7
The progressive living arrangements are unbelievably helpful but also so expensive most can not afford them. This that can usually have enough money to stay home and pay for the necessary help. I think ALs could do a lot more about getting their residents moved on to more suitable facilities when they become too disabled for the staff.
COLady you are one smart cookie. But you are not disabled with dementia which is the big difference between you and the families who place their loved one or not so loved ones in facilities.
My ILs were a good case in point. They downsized when appropriate but clearly problems started but were coped when FIL's health began to break down but his mind remained clear. ML's mental abilities began to decline but the family did not realize because FIL could watch and make sure she did not do anything stupid like leave the cooker on, plus he had always handled the finances and when that became difficult handed it over to his other son. Being in the UK they also seemed to get a lot more help than most people do in the US from Govt paid caregivers. FL died first and MLs deficits immediately became apparent so she had to be placed after a few weeks. After that ML declined very quickly but I think she would have anyway because she had vascular dementia and had frequent TIAs.
justbereal, one shouldn't paint all Memory Care facilities with such a broad brush. The Memory Care that my Dad is in is like a 4-star hotel [I realize not all places are like that, but many are in my area].
As for "dumping" my Dad there, it was his idea to go from Independent Living to Memory Care [Admin also agreed it was time] because he still had math ability to know it would save him a lot of money as he wouldn't need his 24-7 outside caregivers. His budget did allow for him to keep his very favorite caregiver for 4 hours per day to give him a routine.
I only visit Dad once a week for an hour, mainly because I am trying to catch up with all the doctor appointments I had put off for years as my Dad and my late Mom were keeping me busy running them here and there, getting their groceries, all of their own doctor appointments, minor repairs around their house, etc. My own house/yard had been terribly neglected over the years. Oh, did I mention I am 70 years old? I have my own age related declines and medical issues. Like who would pick ME up if I fell? I thank my lucky stars for such places like Memory Care and thank my parents for being frugal to save the money for this huge "rainy day" situation.
Some seniors have mobile issues or the start of memory issues. If they are still able to do things in the home but want to live in a more senior safe environment there is Independent Living where one can either buy or rent an one or two bedroom apartment. Some apartments are 900 sqft, some apartments can be as large as 3000 sqft. Depends on the complex. Some IL complexes offer "assisted living" options where you can pay extra for extra care.
My Dad was in Independent Living, had a very nice apartment with a full size kitchen... the rent was expensive but it offered weekly housekeeping, linen and towel service, one or all meals in the main dining room, nurse and aides on site if needed, transportation, etc.
Now for Assisted Living, again it depends on the senior and what are the mobility issues and memory issues. My Dad is now in Memory Care [Assisted Living] in the same complex. He lives in a studio apartment but doesn't mind that. In fact, the Staff said those with memory issues prefer a studio apartment as they can see all of their "stuff" from their recliner :)
What is the age of your senior citizen? What services, if any do they need? Does that person want more socialization? Do they have resources to pay for a community that offers what they want and need? Are there medical issues?
Living arrangements are very dependent on the individual. There is not a one size fits all. Some live independently all their lives into their 90's and even longer with services necessary in their homes. There is some policy changes as many cannot afford the amenities provided by communities toward "aging in place". So, in a nutshell.... It depends on the person!
She was a very social younger person when she was younger, so I think the increased isolation is going to hasten her decline. It will be Fox News 24/7.
But she refuses to consider any type of senior living. (And I refuse to be her in-home attendant, housecleaner or cook.)
Already a senior at the age of 58 I rejoined the workforce and held a full time job till age 68. Now I definitely need help and have a housecleaner, plus hubby has help with chores that used to be easy for him. It is also exhausting for me to cook a full meal so it would be a real luxury to be able to wander down to a dining room and make my choices.
Personally I would consider assisted living if I could afford it and I was alone. Unfortunately it would be hell on earth living with hubby in a small space.
I do still drive but would not consider making long trips unless it was a case of life and death.
Never been a social butterfly so would also keep to myself quite a lot but would enjoy the convenience of transport to shops. Being able to keep a small animal would also be important. Some amenities would also be very nice like a swimming pool. it really is all a matter of temperament and I think the wishes of older loved ones should be respected as long as they are in a safe environment and capable.
I think it depends on the retirement community. Some are great, I hear. I know people who love where they are. Like getting to hang out with folks your own age for a change and getting away from the cell phone, texting, and instant everything mentality.
After emptying out my parents house of 72 years of "stuff", I decided it was time for me to start emptying out my own house of items I no longer use, or only use once or twice a year. I have narrowed down the community for my next home, still a single family house, but with a first floor master bedroom [stairs aren't easy as we age], and less square footage... the yards are maintained by the HOA. I know I am not ready to pay the high price of renting an apartment in Independent Living, but I would plan to put my name on a waiting list as those of us early baby boomers are aging. Luckly I am in an area where 55+ and Independent/Assisted/Memory complexes are being built left and right.
I also like the "senior discounts" at the stores :)
Then decide-
#1 Living in Place
#2 Assisted Living
#3 Nursing Home
#4 Living with family (I strongly urge AGAINST this).
You tell 'em, Good for you.
Interesting there is an uptick of older parents living with their families especially for those who live in subdivisions.
That's all well and good, though I take it your mom can't go "off site" unless she is accompanied by someone from the AL?
Now, Memory Care is totally different. It is pitiful that families dump their memory impaired loved ones, who are always incontinent, if not when they arrive, definitely soon after, off at an assisted living and literally leave them there until they die. As a person declines they should be moved to a full scale nursing home with RNs on staff and machines to lift these people who eventually become bed bound, develop bed sores that never heal, and break the backs of the caregivers. But families NEVER do that. NEVER. It is tragic. It is illegal, but goes on all the time. If your loved one needs full care, take them where they can get it for God's sake. Don't be in denial, no facility with the word ASSISTED in the name is for people who cannot get out of bed, or feed themselves, or stop themselves from screaming uncontrollably for hours on end. And I say all of those hard to hear things out of LOVE for human beings who have worked hard their whole lives and DESERVE better than to be dumped off at a facility who cannot possibly give them the care they NEED and DESERVE.
Moving a loved one to memory care is not "dumping". Many times it is the ONLY feasible option. When the become uncommunicative, not able to eat or get out of bed is many times when hospice is brought in.
But yes there are souls whose minds have disintegrated inside otherwise healthy bodies, and they do not belong in the highly regimented environment of most Nursing Homes, I agree.
The best facilities I have seen follow care through from simple older age support to full-on nursing for the "elderly, frail and mentally frail" as they used to put it in the olden days (1990s!), providing client-centred care in the truest meaning of the phrase. I'd be happy to name names but I don't think it would go down well, and besides they're UK organisations and no help to AC members - though I'm sure there are US groups which are at least as good. I just wish there were more of them.
There are independent "Retirement Communities" and may have all stags from retirement, assisted to memory care and some to full nursing care. The cost will depend upon the level of care needed.
Advantages...
No Mortgage..but chances are the current house is probably paid for unless there are second, third or more mortgages.
No heating costs
No lighting costs
No water bill or sewer
No garbage pick up bill
Minimal food costs
Some transportation provided
Arranged outings.
Being able to pick up and go without having to worry about a vacant looking house
Disadvantages
You have to let someone know where you are going, signing in and out
You are living close to people that you may not like
These are just 2 that I can think of now..It would be like me moving back into an apartment not something I want to do..ever again.
So there are advantages and disadvantages
Much depend upon what the person needs and wants.
At some point though Assisted or Memory Care might be necessary for the sake of safety. And Assisted Living or Memory Care is probably less expensive in the long run compared to having a live in caregiver or multiple caregivers 24/7
I think ALs could do a lot more about getting their residents moved on to more suitable facilities when they become too disabled for the staff.
COLady you are one smart cookie. But you are not disabled with dementia which is the big difference between you and the families who place their loved one or not so loved ones in facilities.
My ILs were a good case in point. They downsized when appropriate but clearly problems started but were coped when FIL's health began to break down but his mind remained clear. ML's mental abilities began to decline but the family did not realize because FIL could watch and make sure she did not do anything stupid like leave the cooker on, plus he had always handled the finances and when that became difficult handed it over to his other son. Being in the UK they also seemed to get a lot more help than most people do in the US from Govt paid caregivers. FL died first and MLs deficits immediately became apparent so she had to be placed after a few weeks. After that ML declined very quickly but I think she would have anyway because she had vascular dementia and had frequent TIAs.
As for "dumping" my Dad there, it was his idea to go from Independent Living to Memory Care [Admin also agreed it was time] because he still had math ability to know it would save him a lot of money as he wouldn't need his 24-7 outside caregivers. His budget did allow for him to keep his very favorite caregiver for 4 hours per day to give him a routine.
I only visit Dad once a week for an hour, mainly because I am trying to catch up with all the doctor appointments I had put off for years as my Dad and my late Mom were keeping me busy running them here and there, getting their groceries, all of their own doctor appointments, minor repairs around their house, etc. My own house/yard had been terribly neglected over the years. Oh, did I mention I am 70 years old? I have my own age related declines and medical issues. Like who would pick ME up if I fell? I thank my lucky stars for such places like Memory Care and thank my parents for being frugal to save the money for this huge "rainy day" situation.