Is anxiety contagious?

Much depends on on the caregiver's baseline. For so many reasons known and unknown, I've tended toward anxiety since childhood; I've also tended to have very high ( some might even say unrealistic)expectations of myself and others. To mitigate or at least lesson this anxiety, I've used a number of strategies over the years, I've learned to meditate; read self help & spiritual books; journaled; been lap swimming regularly; talked with friends; gone to counseling; have gone for spiritual direction. Last but far from least, for the past 35 I've been married to a warm, supportive, laid back dear one. I've counted on my husband's counterbalancing my intensity. We've been a great team! The new twist is that in the last few years since he began to show signs of dementia I've noticed he's become more anxious. At first I fed into his anxiety. Now, I am able to notice both his triggers and mine. i have really benefited from attending an excellent four session caregiver training which helped me with new information; reframed some of my challenges and offered lots of practical suggestions. I've also been routinely participating in a caregiver support group that is well facilitated by a Social Worker. My montra has become " I'm doing the best I can in this moment...and so are you dear". That defuses the anxiety and frustration for us both. I've become more trusting in the Mystery since in retrospect, I can see how I'm able to draw on all that I've learned and continue to learn. Self compassion is very important . Only to the degree I can have deep compassion for my own self, will I be able to have deep compassion for the loved one I'm caring for. I'm grateful that I still have this moment...an opportunity to try again and give back. While what has and continues to be helpful to me ...may not be helpful to you, trying a variety of options can be helpful. Experiment! Know that you really can't make a mistake. Learning from what doesn't work can be even more relevant! Finally, prayers of petition can be supportive yet don't have to be formal. Sometimes I simply say..".God help me". Simple prayers of gratitude remind me of all that I do have or all I am noticing and learning from. May it be so for you as well. Sincerely Elle

Go Mag!!!

I believe it is. We care for my ML with ALZ and my wife's cousin will take her for a night or two from time to time. And even though there are days when she's really no problem to care for, when she's out of the house there is a deafening. Peace about it. Just knowing that she is not down the hall, not getting up to walk around or come and ask us questions about if we gave her her pills yet, or not make it to the bathroom again, it's almost euphoric. I wonder why we didn't feel the same before she ever moved in....

While it is not contagious, it, no doubt, is hereditary.

I've noticed a lot of that myself, MIL has ALWAYS been on psych meds for her nervous break down in '74 but now that she has Alzheimer's and dementia her "anxiety has gotten much worse and when she is I AM !! Lately, well the last few months I dread waking up because I never know what kind of MOOD she is going to be in and in turn now I AM taking nerve pills at night and most night go to bed EARLY ( like 7 pm) right after we get her fed get the dishes done and give her night time pills I run to the bedroom and I'm out for the night.