My parents let my irresponsible sister move in with them. - AgingCare.com

My parents let my irresponsible sister move in with them.

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My parents let my sister move in with them. She is a hoarder, morbidly obese and unable to care for her self now she is my parents apartment where i've been trying to care for them

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I think this is an awful time for you. You feel so helpless don't you? We had a helpless to help situation for years. As long as people are able to make their own decisions there is so little you can do except worry and hope that nothing tragic happens. Since she lived with them before she is probably going to stay right where she has planted herself - with their permission.

I am sorry.
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I tried getting social service involved with her and she refused to let them in. she just continued to pay for internet and cable but didn't take care of her necessary expenses. now she has lost her apartment and thought i would just continue taking care of my parents bills and groceries as i have done. she put herself onto their tv service , added internet to their phone service and will probably get on their cell phone too. I can barely make myself go to the apartment because of the chaos and smell. I feel she is a danger to them but my parents defend her. she's 53 and my mom's on dialysis and my dad has congestive heart failure. He looks terrible and i think the stress has been too much for him. : (
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no, she lived with them all of her life until the past 3 years when they lost their house to foreclosure (they couldn't sell the house because of the of her portion . Woundn't let agent show her three rooms. My parents didn't want her to move into their apartment but would not let her be homeless. Now she has begun ruining the apartment and other family members won't visit. I fear for my parents safety in event of fire or other emergency.
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Can your sister be of any help to you at all? Is she totally dependent on your parents? Maybe you could get her connected with social services to get her on assistance. Surely your parents do not expect you to take care of her now?

I have hoarders in my family and it is absolutely awful. I am not a neat freak but boxes and containers of crap that will never be used stacked all over the place just makes me itch. You will really have to be upfront and firm about how much stuff can be allowed in the apartment for your parents own safety and comfort.

How about setting a clean up and move out date! I know I'm dreaming but it is still a subject for discussion. At least she will understand how disruptive this is for you in caring for your parents. It is your parents home!

Good luck!
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