Anyone have insight, personal experience, with caring for a much older spouse? - AgingCare.com

Anyone have insight, personal experience, with caring for a much older spouse?

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My husband is 29 years my senior and he has been diagnosed with congestive heart failure. He is considered "borderline" by Hospice and to date I am his sole caregiver. His condition is worsening steadily, more weakness, weight loss and lethargy. In my area I will need to pay between $22-$27 per hour for in-home care. Thus far he is able to handle his personal needs (with some difficulty) but I am anticipating this will not be the case much longer. He has been deterioriating for almost 5 years and I have had about 3 weeks away during that time. Yes, I am sleeping badly, seeing my physician more often than I would like and generally worn down. Our relationship has not been a marriage for some time and I have accepted my situation. I think constantly about getting away by myself, working on remembering what it is I want out of life and moving forward. If you know how to deal with this life in limbo I'm stuck in, please, share your ideas.

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HOspice should analyze every 30-60 days. Squeeky chain gets the grease. Keep calling and ask them... ask them, and ask them.
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Contact your council on aging as they may have some idea of resources that are available. In my area, one agency gets some grants and are able to provide some care on a sliding scale if that is a possibility. Definitely the VA if he was a vet. But if the Doctor orders in home care...then medicare will pay for it for a time. Especially if he can not manage his medication personally...The visiting nurse or similar can set all that up and assess changes in help and need for more care.
Strength to you!

My husband is 18 years my senior. He is ok right now (which is good since I am caring for my mom) but I worry about the future and want to avoid having our kids stuck like I am now.
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His MD should order in home care, which Medicare will cover temporarily. People with CHF can live several years. If hubby is a war time vet, call the VA. Also go up to Money and Legal and click on Paying for Care.
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