Do you notice an increase in negative comments from your loved one?

I think the more they feel ill, or like they can't do much anymore, it really starts getting them down and stressed. Sometimes it can be side effects from medications. I know, its not easy, as my father has gotten more ill, he's just not the same as when we were kids. I wish you luck.

Sorry, I also meant to say with your mom having Dementia or Alzheimer, they do not know why they aren't remembering things, or they start to forget who they are ( again being frustrated) and I have heard they can become a "different person." ( you are going through this already so you know that, as well as others here who are going through it.

I am not for sure if it happens a lot with them, because I do not have experience with Dementia or Alzheimer, but I wanted to lend my support.

Sorry if I didn't make sense.. its been rough here.. loss of sleep and concentration..

I think you're right! I really am frustrated and saddened with the "new Mom". I think it's a combination of having her living with us, my being selfish and not liking my loss of freedom, and the fear of what my future could be. I know that she has lost so much in the last couple of years and I should be more compassionate. But at times, I find it very difficult. I guess I'm not the person I thought I was and that, too, makes me sad. But, on the other hand, I know Mom is much happier living with us than she was in nursing care, so we must be doing something right!

My Dad is more judgmental. His filter of what is ok to say out loud is also not as active as it once was. However, if you notice a sudden change, it could be related to medication. We put Dad on Aricept and noticed that he got angry more often and with much greater intensity than before. We took him off the drug and he is back to his kinder gentler self.

I've started keeping a journal to make it easier to track patterns. Then you can look back and see if changes are related to some change you have made.

No changes in meds. Mom just seems to be more critical. We were watching a weight loss tv show the other day, and she said, "Damn, he's fat!" I wanted to say, "no sh$t, this is a show about weight loss!," but I did hold my tongue. A lot of "she's ugly" or "he's ugly". She even commented that a weather lady, who had just recently had a baby was "a cow". I think you are right...the filter is just not there any more!

Roxanne dementia stole my Mom's filter a long time ago.. That is why I refuse to take her out to eat.. (except on her birthday) she has embarrassed me too many times!!!