I have a good friend that's in her early 80's with eye problems. I'm looking for suggestions to get her to stop driving.

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A good friend in her 80's has lost the vision in one eye (very blurry, swollen and painful) The eye doctor's tell her they can't save the eye and have given her drops to help with the swelling. The problem... she's still driving. She managed to pass her last written test but she can't see. And the pain in the bad eye distracts her. Nothing anyone has said to her will get her to stop. I understand she dosn't want to lose her independence but she's going to end up killing someone. As a non-relative, can I report her to the DMV for a more extensive driving test? Her brothers are enabling her by fixing her car over and over (it's falling apart). She can't afford to buy another car so if they would just tell her it can't be fixed it would take care of the problem. She has a boyfriend who will driver her places. And I'm more than willing to take her places too. But she doesn't like to plan ahead, instead want's to jump in the car and go when she wants too. I'm open for suggestions...

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I would write out what you've shared here and make sure her doctor gets that information before her appointment. When she checks in, hand it to the office person and ask that the doctor see it prior to seeing your friend. You should be able to do it in a way that is unseen by your friend. Good luck and let us know how it goes.
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Reply to blannie
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Call her eye doctor. He can call DMV and tell them she shouldn't be driving. Not sure if she should be in constant pain. Is she using her drops.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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My father was blind in 1 eye since WWII when he was treated for Malaria with Quinine.

He drove fine as he followed the rules of "check the mirrors often" - never an accident.  And he drove in New York City.  We're talking 'major traffic' on a daily basis.

He drove until he was 83 - and only stopped due to a heart condition that his cardiologist was afraid would impair his reflexes.
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Reply to RayLinStephens
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In my area, a seven-year-old girl was crossing at the crossing as her school let out. A lady in her 70s (or 80s) hit and killed her. She was blind in one eye and couldn't see out of the other (glaucoma). Tragic and senseless.

While your friend does have one eye that works, you say her pain can distract her. Plus, she's likely like able to compensate yet with the lose of one eye. Plus, with her advancing age, her reaction would be slower if she did detect someone suddenly in her lane. I get it about not wanting to lose independent and having to schedule someone to pick her up, someone's life just isn't worth being stubborn. Hopefully you'll get the right answer this Friday. Thank you for pushing to do the right thing.
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Reply to MountainMoose
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I'm taking her to see the doctor this Friday and at her request, going in with her.
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Reply to whaleyf
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When both my friends for whom I am POA continued to drive after their licenses were revoked, because they forgot about that, I called Adult Protective Services for advice. A lady came out to interview them and I was there first so she would be let in. They had refused other evaluators the doctor had sent. The husband sounded very credible for the first minute or so and than began repeating himself because he forgot what he had already said. The lady asked how they got their groceries and the husband responded they went to the story like usual. She asked about their licenses being revoked and the husband responded with a big surprise: "They are?!" Later, when interviewing the husband, she asked what he thought they should do with their car if they couldn't drive and he replied "Sell it and get some money out of it!" At that point I was able to get him to give me the keys (He had refused before when I asked) and I could move the car out of their garage to a friends garage while we got it ready to sell. He later forgot all about this and we got a call one morning from my panicked friend saying "our cars are gone!" So, for me, APS was the key in making some progress at this stage of their lives. I learned later that their eye doctor was the one who alerted the DMV about their needing a test, which neither would have been able to pass. Rather than take the test, they just didn't respond and the revocation was automatic. But, they still had their old licenses in their billfolds and thought everything was fine.
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Reply to JohnnyJ
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We live in Ohio. She brought up the fact that people with vision in only one eye drive just fine. That's true. I'm one of them. But my eyes have been like that since birth. And I adjusted to it with no problem. She has to hold her eye shut (won't wear a patch) and the pain keeps her distracted. So she's driving with one hand and in pain. Yesterday we were at a food bank together and she stood on top of me at the table stepping on me. She realized she didn't know I was even there as she didn't see me. Scary. If I don't get help from the doctor I'll call the DMV. Her license renewal is coming up soon. I really like this friend and the last thing I want to see happen is a news headline that an elderly lady in her 80's has killed a guy on a bike because she lost control of her car. Happens way too much.
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Reply to whaleyf
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One thing to remember - the DMV can issue an ID card. Mthr had lost her purse so I stopped by the courthouse in her hometown where she was born and where she married, and we had other documents already to satisfy the new ID requirements. I went in and told them we needed to get her an identification card. I offered to fill out the form for her and the examiner whispered to me, is she turning in her license and I said yes. She was none the wiser. She was beyond the ability to drive, but needed an ID for the hospital where she needed cancer surgery (100% successful in removing a softball sized malignancy from her colon). I am so thankful I took her for an ID!
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Reply to surprise
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Most DMV's require you fill out paperwork telling them why you do not feel the person is safe to drive anymore. You can often find the paperwork online at your DMV website. List your reasons, including that she can't see well and list her doctors names, addresses, and phone#'s. It takes many months to complete the process. In the meantime, keep in touch with her needs and be there when she needs a ride. Good luck.
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Reply to IMBabci2
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I had to turn in my brother-in-law, who had Parkinsons and drove erractically. Sooner or later he would have been involved in a serious accident, and I didn't want to be responsible for his or an innocent person's death. I just called the DMV, explained the situation, and they were grateful for the information. The next time he went to renew his DL, they pulled it. He never knew why, but it was a huge relief to our entire town!
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Reply to Kantexmama
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