I'm caring for a friend that is 75. She doesn't pay me for care. Can someone help me with a check to take care of her?

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Pleaae start getting paid immediately. If you continue with this arrangement, protect yourself with a contract.

If if you cannot be paid, help you friend find a suitable place for her. You can still visit and look in on her.

Check private home home care costs in your area. If you have extra qualifications (RN?) you should be compensated at a higher level.

Keep in mind that if she gets injured in your home you could be blamed or held liable. Your homeowners insurance could increase.

The family could “abandon” the both of you and never come around. If you are doing this for a close friend (“for the friendship”), the friendship may not even survive all the future problems.

Does this woman have POAs? Advance directives? If she needs to go to the ER in the middle of the night, who makes decisions if she is unable?

The longer you wait, the harder it will be to have the conversation. You will have “lost” more pay and patience. (Additionally, you may grow resentful). Up front, you need to discuss what conditions could make this arrangement end for you. For example, if she becomes bedridden, you will no longer be able to provide care.

Caring for a or a loved one at home is very difficult and with time, conditions worsen. Over time you may even be required to alter your home.
Helpful Answer (2)

I agree. Since you are not a relative, you should not have been asked to do this”for free”. It’s nice to help out a friend, but “nice” only goes so far. Caregiving is a huge undertaking.

Sit down with your friend and explain to her/him that the “trial period”:of caregiving is over and you now need to be compensated for your services. Consider what rents are in your area and include utilities. She should also pitch in for food. If she uses incontinence supplies, those should also be paid for and not by you. State-funded compensation, if it even exists, isn’t much. When I researched it for caregiving for my husband, I was told I’d be entitled to $40 a week.

This family needs to pay their own way if they want you to continue caring for their relative. The alternative is at least $5,000 a month in a nursing home. A legal contract for caregiving should be drawn up by an attorney and signed by everyone involved. Also, check with your homeowner’s insurance carrier to see what coverage you have should she become injured in your home. Even friends can sue friends.
Quit letting yourself be used.
Helpful Answer (3)

This is probably a silly question, but why have you not been able to sort out this issue with your friend?
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