He is age 51, I'm 41. He recently started charging rent. He charges me $300 a month, is very controlling and mentally abusive. He also will clean up and say I owe him for what he cleaned. PLEASE help

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Find another caregiving job, if you like that kind of work. Or find other kind of work. Or go back to school to learn new skills for a better job.

But quit this job. He is 51. Are you willing to take this abuse for another 5 years? 15? 25? Life is too short to live it in misery.

PS ... live-in caregivers do not pay rent.
Helpful Answer (8)
Reply to jeannegibbs

It could get worse.

Good luck
Helpful Answer (7)
Reply to BuzzyBee

Tell him that charging you rent means that he declares income that the IRS and VA would be VERY interested to know about.
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to Guestshopadmin

Oh heck no!
Quit and move out now!
Helpful Answer (6)
Reply to XenaJada

Move out! What are you doing?!
Helpful Answer (5)
Reply to Pepsee

He shouldn't be charging you rent if you are helping him, but if it's not working out then maybe he needs to have someone else help him. He probably doesn't want to have a stranger helping him though.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Francisca

Tell him two can play at this game and that you went up on your services. $500 a month more than the gov pays and he’s got $200 more to work off. Hop to it. Every time he comes up with some bogus charge you raise your rates. Lots of bookkeeping, better write it all down.
Just teasing Jadensmom, ——but really, it sounds very dysfunctional.
Is he dangerous? Probably best just to find another job and not aggravate him.
Is your son caught in the middle? How old is he?
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to 97yroldmom

get out now it will only get worse
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Kimber166

You not say why you are his caregiver, what is his "disability" and the % of disability?
By the way..are you also getting child support? As a single Mom you are entitled to child support. That would be enough to provide shelter, clothing, food and various other living expenses. I am guessing the amount he would owe in child support would be more than the "rent" he is charging you.
2 can play these "games"
And just a thought you might want to talk to a VA social worker or patient advocate.
If this is a new issue this might indicate a change in his mental status.

If at any time you feel that you or your child are not safe GET OUT. Make sure you have a "go bag" packed and ready.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Grandma1954