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East, is there some reason title is vested only in your wife's name? If it was in yours, you could get a mortgage through the VA, and it wouldn't be as restrictive or costly as an RM. There's a possibility your wife could get a VA loan as well, since she's married to a Veteran, but I'm not sure about this and you'd have to check it out.

However, if you really wanted an RM, only your wife could get one because you're not named on the title.

Also, for whatever reason you might want it, I hope you'll take the time to check out what else the VA has to offer, especially if you want the mortgage to fund care for either of you.
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