If I am a caregiver and want to leave, can I just go?

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I am a caregiver for my boyfriend but not legally can I just leave? He is too difficult to deal with. He has alienated his family and has no one but me. I can't deal with the mental abuse too much more.

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If ur on SSI then you are getting Medicaid. Check out services they have that may help your boyfriend. Call SSI and see if they can help you find a place to live. Explain the situation. Is this "mental abuse" new to his disability? If so, its not new to a person who just became disabled. They take it out on the one who is the closest to them. Ask Office of Aging if they know of a free therapist that takes Medicaid. If so, try to get ur BF to see them and you too. You need to have a plan before you can leave him.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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When is the lease up? When do you have to give notice that you are not renewing it? Do you have some good options for where you could go?

What is BF's disability? (Why does he need a caregiver?) Is he following a treatment plan?

I think that just walking out would be a bit harsh, but I do agree that you can't continue to accept abuse. Call Adult Protection Services and explain the situation. You are both vulnerable adults but living together is not working out. You are being abused. You don't wish him harm but you cannot continue to provide his care.
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Reply to jeannegibbs
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The lease is in both our names.
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Reply to dontknowwhy
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You need to believe the brother that they are unavailable. Now what? Again if he is abusive and living in your home you probably will need to evict him. If the home belongs to the both of your, perhaps a shared lease then you have to look to your contract. If it’s his home then you need to find a place of your own. I’m sure it is difficult regardless of the legalities. Come here to vent but try to move forward towards good mental health.
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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We live in Wisconsin. We are both on SSDI. He is 57 and I am 51. I reached out to his brother and he told me that he could not help him that he has alienated his family and I only had heard my boyfriends side of things he also said that my BF was very manipulative.
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Reply to dontknowwhy
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Your question is can you just leave but your profile says you are living in your home.
If you want him out of your house then that presents one set of problems different from your leaving.
While I agree there is a general feeling that a family is responsible for a relative it isn’t always that simple is it?
Regardless of living arrangements remember you are choosing to put up with the abuse. Choose again.
Give more information for better answers and come her to vent anytime you need to.
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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Sounds terrible. Truly. I agree with the previous post suggesting Adult Protective Services. At least that way someone knows where he is, what care he needs, and they will know he's alone and in need of help. You should not put up with poor treatment. My only other thought on this is that if you reach out to an agency (such as APS) they will probably ask why you can't continue as caregiver. How much you tell them is up to you, but just be ready with an answer because you will likely be asked the reason. In my case, the person's needs increased and I was unable to provide the requested/required additional care and I had to give up. She's now in a nursing home.
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Reply to OverTheEdge17
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So sorry for your problem. Very hard decision. Really need more info. Ages for one. What kind of income does he have? It will be easier for us to help you navigate the services out there that are available.

No, you are not legally obligated to care for him, but I don't think you want to put him out on the street either. Knowing the state you live in would help too.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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The next time he starts his abuse, video it on your phone. Call Adult Protective Services and tell them you can no longer care for him, that you don’t feel safe. Even if he has alienated his family, they are more responsible for him than you are. I wonder what would happen if you left him on one of their doorsteps?
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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Not a lot of details given but your boyfriend lives in your house and you want to resign from being his caregiver? Are you resigning from being his girlfriend too? If you are you’ll need to evict him or put him in a care facility. I hope he’s on some kind of program, getting pension, SSI, Medicaid, etc then you could relocate him in a facility. Probably the psych hospital?
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Reply to HolidayEnd
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