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My sister's daughter made her sign a life estate deed to "protect the house from Medicaid." The other children were not aware this had happened. Now the daughter says it’s her house. She took my 78-year-old sister to a lawyer behind the other 3 children’s backs and told her if she didn’t sign the house over to her she would place her in a nursing home and Medicaid would take her house. My sister wanted all the children to split the house but her daughter is saying she’s not signing anything and the house is hers.


My sister is still living in the house. How do we get the house in all the kids' names like my sister always wanted?


The daughter that did this was POA and changed all the beneficiaries on her accounts and life insurance policies to herself. My sister told her that she had to leave the house to her in to protect it from Medicaid. So, she took her to have her will updates and changed all the beneficiaties to herself. The other children were left only her possessions to split. We have changed her POA to one of the other daughters and also changed the beneficiaries on her  accounts. Her biggest asset is her house (value $360k). And the daughter is refusing to sign it back over to my sister. she lives in NC. I have found some laws about financial exploitation of the elderly. Is that the best way to handle this?

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If your sister had the mental capacity to change the POA legally and that happened recently then she should have the capacity to change the life estate.

Your post has many red flags that lead to suspecting that no ethical lawyer was involved. While everyone is fussing over her estate, who is actually caring for sis?

Here is a link that you might want to check.

Your sister sounds like a pawn based on your description.

https://www.napsa-now.org/financial-exploitation/
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Reply to 97yroldmom
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I was PoA for my Aunt. Whenever we went to the elder law attorney to make any changes or additions, I had to stay in the waiting area while the attorney took my Aunt into a separate room to assess her legal capacity to understand what she was doing and to make sure she wasn't being coerced by me to make these changes.

Your version of events doesn't make sense to me (and others who have been through this process with a LO).

Where are you getting this information from? Your Mom? Or the niece? Or another of your sister's children worried about their inheritance?

If you are not the PoA and not one of the adult children then you should really stay out of this issue, as apparently you don't even have facts straight and will only make the situation worse with misinformation and taking sides.

One other thing to consider: your sister and niece may be understanding how much of her life (her daughter's) is being given up to care for her Mom and this is a way to compensate her for the loss. Family members can make some terrible decisions when they have an expectation of an inheritance. Maybe your sister's other children should step in or contribute to the caregiving and they'd know what a sacrifice it is.

Many seniors think they'll be able to leave this and that to their children only to come up on the hard facts of the cost of caregiving. My own Mom cannot accept that she may not be able to leave any money to her grandkids because she needs to pay for her care instead.
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Jada824 Aug 16, 2025
My mother’s lawyer did not do this. My brother contacted the lawyer, told her what to do and stayed in the room the whole time. Some lawyers & sibling are driven by pure greed!
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A "life estate" can be left to all the children. Your sister remains in the home and is responsible for taxes, utilities and upkeep until she passes then the house reverts to the beneficiaries.

A POA can only be revoked by the principle and only the principle can assign another person. Your sister had to be of sound mind to do this. Your sister also had to change her beneficiaries, POA does not allow this.

I hope sister is one of those we's. Otherwise, I don't know how you were able to change anything back. A lawyer will be your best bet in getting the house back.
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How did you change the POA?
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funkygrandma59 Aug 15, 2025
Exactly! This makes no sense at all as only the owner of the house and all the other assets can designate who is POA, which in this case is the OP's sister.
And of course she has to be of sound mind to be able to do that.
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Daughter1930 is right. If your sister was in lawyer's office doing this kind of legal documents your niece would have had to wait outside. No lawyer would have allowed her to be present.

If your sister hasn't been decared legally incompetent, she can do whatever she wants with her house and any other assets she has. That's not for you to decide.

Your niece however may be in for a rude awakening if your sister has to go to a nursing home or memory care facility. Unless she stays out of one for five years (or whatever the law is in NC) which most states have as their Medicaid look-back period, your niece will lose that property and any other assets she has in her name that belonged to your sister. All that will have to be spent down on her care before she can even be considered for Medicaid. I don't think your niece knows this. You should tell her this and your sister.

It could very well be that your sister has an agreement with her daughter to keep her out of a nursing home and that's why she put everything over to her like she did. I've seen this play out many times. The one sibling keeps the parent out of care until any Medicaid look back period is done then they put them in LTC.
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Reply to BurntCaregiver
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My dad chose a life estate deed on his house to allow me as his will executor to be able to avoid probate and sell the house quickly after his death. When we went to the lawyer who’d handled his will to have this done, the lawyer quickly ushered me out and met with dad privately. This was to be very sure the life estate deed was his idea, he fully understood it, and wasn’t being talked into it or coerced by anyone, me included. This is part of the duties of every lawyer, not that there can’t be unscrupulous ones. Your sister can make any legal changes she wishes as long as she’s of sound mind. She’s the only one supposed to changes beneficiaries and POA’s. Your sister needs sound legal advice from a good elder care attorney and to be firm in her decisions.
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