Barbbrooklyn, sent me links on personality disorders. There are a lot of them!! She fits the bill for obsessive compulsive personality disorder. Not to be confused with OCD which is a form of anxiety. My mother had all the traits. Preoccupied with rules, orderliness, control, can’t throw anything out, gets angry over little things, can’t delegate orders and if she does they have to be done EXACTLY the way she wants it done. I mean EXACTLY!! I asked her the other day if she wanted my help to soak her foot. Her reply was no, you won’t do it right. I can’t believe I finally found a diagnosis that fits her to a tee!!! Now will she see a doctor about it. NO because in her mind there is nothing wrong with her. But I can seek therapy. I can try it again. But now at least I have some compassion and know that she really does have an illness. A mental illness. I know I still need to set boundaries with her but I know now I don’t need to take it personally. I want to thank Barbbrooklyn for sending me links and having me read up on it. I looked up borderline personality disorder and she only has 2 traits. But Obsessive compulsive personality disorder she had all of them with the exception of dresses impeccable. She’s not that but she said when she was younger she always worried about how she looked. At 95 she doesn’t care how she looks. Somebody else had this same question on this forum in 2013. Can anybody relate to it? Suggestions welcomed!!