I resent being a caretaker and it hasn’t gotten bad yet. Advice?

You're not alone! Taking care of a loved one is one of the number one causes for depression and anxiety. If I were you the first thing I would do is go to a therapist and talk about what you're going through and they will probably prescribe you some antidepressant / anti-anxiety meds to help you through this. Honestly, that's about the only way to get through it in my opinion! I took care of my 84 year old dad who has dementia and a leg amputation for about 6 months prior to putting him in a nursing home. I wanted to care for him but it was very difficult as a single mom with 3 kids and a full time job. I became bitter and exhausted and finally resulted to putting him in a nursing home. I feel guilty about that as it is and every time I go to visit him he says he'd rather be dead than live there and to please get him out of there and let him live with me. So that constant nagging guilt is always in the background of my life.