She is a diabetic is in cancer remission has chronic pain. She walked around my house tonight, naked from waist down, and denied it. She takes too many meds. I dont have proof, but she steals my meds or begs for them. She put stuff in the frig that didnt belong, she tossed food all over the kitchen blamming it on our animals who where with me. Constantly claiming people are stealing from her, looses stuff blamming it on and my daughter's friends. She tried to cook dog lamb food potatoes and tomatoes to eat. She won't throw old unsafe food away even if in frig for weeks. She gets angry when I do. She is stating my oldest is severally mentally ill when it's a smaller issue.
She seems to always want to care for grandchildren. She isn't safe and can fool people as she was an RN for 20 plus years and has searious drg problem
HELP ME please
K
I am caring for someone with age-related decline, alzheimer's / dementia, anxiety, cancer, depression, incontinence, sleep disorder, and vision problems.
Your sister has ALZ/dementia, obviously, and since you say 'she walked around my house tonight, naked from the waist down.........' I will assume she is either living with you also, or at least staying with you.
Are you familiar with dementia/ALZ and how people suffering with it behave? How they are paranoid, accusing others of 'stealing' their things, not aware that dog food isn't for human consumption, and also prone to blaming others for their own actions, not understanding 'blame' or their own actions to be inappropriate?
Your sister may also not realize what she's doing by 'taking drugs' and certainly not with keeping old food in the fridge. She's not responsible for her behavior as her brain is broken. That's not to say you should keep her living with you, of course not. But if she's refusing to go into Memory Care AL, then you could have a problem on your hands. Do you have POA for her and has she been declared incompetent? Has her doctor formally diagnosed her with dementia/ALZ?
If you have POA for her, then you can get her placed into Memory Care AL or a facility without her consent. If you do not have POA for her and she's been diagnosed with dementia/ALZ, then it's too late to get POA now as she's not able to give it to you, legally. You'd have to see an elder care attorney about getting guardianship for your sister and then you could place her. That would be my first course of action: to make an appt with a Certified Elder Care attorney whom you could give all the pertinent details to about your sister and this entire situation you're faced with. S/he could guide you accordingly about what to do next. Without all the details, it's hard for a forum of internet people to advise you.
If your sister has a medical emergency or acts out to the point where she's a danger to you or to herself, I suggest you call 911 and have her transported to the ER for a psych evaluation. Then, if the hospital wants to discharge her, you can tell them you're unable to take her back into your home, and to please have the social worker place her. That's a last resort really, but something to think about if things get very out of hand.
I'm sorry you are faced with such a stressful situation. I'm also sorry for your sister, with all these health issues she's facing. And your daughter who's being exposed to such accusations. Don't allow your sister to deal with your daughter or your grandchildren while you work this whole mess out. If she has a 'serious drug problem', then it's not safe for her to be around young children. Your daughter, if she has even a slight mental health issue, won't benefit from dealing with your sister and her outbursts and unhinged behaviors either.
Wishing you the best of luck and Godspeed as you try to get help for your sister by placing her appropriately.
This complicates things enormously and isn't something you can handle alone.
Are you POA for your sister?
Is your sister diagnosed with dementia?
If not, you are helpless in this situation. If this is Sister's home you can leave and report her to APS for wellness check. If this is your home you need to know that by taking Sister into your home you have made it HER residence. You cannot remove someone from their residence.
I would see an Elder Law Attorney who can query you as to all the facts in this case and then guide you in all the options available to you.
I sure an sorry and wish you good luck.