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I asked dad to allow me to go through all of mom's stuff after she passed in July. I haven't had the chance yet to go down (was supposed to go next week but dh was diagnosed with pneumonia yesterday). Dad was going to just have the housekeeper go through it all, take what she wanted, and send the rest to a thrift shop. Honestly, the thought of this broke my heart. I want to go through her things, hold her clothes and belongings one last time.


I have someone to take all the size 6 clothes. But I am struggling with what to do with the rest. Mom bought most of her clothes at Boscov's, some still have price tags (not that I want to return them, just that they have never been worn). Last year I took some of her clothes to a consignment shop 45 minutes away from me and discovered that they only take ten items at a time and only once a week. Really wasn't worth it for me to keep making the trek over there.


Mom probably has fifty pairs of shoes, twenty purses, ten coats / jackets, two full jewelry cases. So much to go through.


I do plan to take items I want (maybe shoes, a purse or two) and send pictures to my sister of things and see if anything is of interest to her. And I'd like to talk to dad about divvying up the jewelry amongst the granddaughters.


Beyond this, what kind of suggestions from those who have been there and done this can you give? I really don't want to just donate it all to a thrift shop or try to consign it. I have no experience with ebay or online sales of any sort. And neither my dad's home nor mine are conducive to yard sales. I keep feeling like there is an option that I am missing.

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I am sorry for your loss. But please keep in mind the clothes are not your mother and it is up to your Dad how he wants to the clothing to be distributed. If he is happy for it to go to a thrift shop, then that is his choice.

Ask Dad if you can take a few items, and I think it is great that you want your mother's grandaughters to get her jewelry, but are there grandsons too? Grandsons may want a ring to give a future partner.

Other posters have mentioned various programs that may take donations. Remember that many of us have cleared out our closets while stuck at home and thrift and consignment stores may be overflowing and unable to take more clothing.
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graygrammie Sep 2020
Dad is the one that did not want mom to send her stuff to a thrift shop but gave it to me to take to consignment. As for rings -- mom never wore rings. She has necklaces, earrings, bracelets, and pins.
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ALos, Catholic Charities has a refugee assistance arm. They need household items to set up households for refugee families. Furniture, kitchen items. Other agencies do this also
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We gave my mother’s clothing to a women’s alcohol and drug treatment center. It was a Christian based treatment program and they were very grateful for the clothes, told us that many women arrived with only the clothes they had on, and all would be worn and appreciated. It was important to my dad that her clothing be used and worn and this proved to be an excellent solution
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What I am seeing from your letter, is not that you are expecting or needing to make money from the clothes, but that you want them to go to people that would appreciate them as your mom did.
There are agencies in my area that would appreciate good quality clothes. One deals with lower income people that need "interview clothes". Also womens shelters, people that are fleeing abusive situations often only have the clothes on their back. Also agencies that deal with kids aging out of foster system, but I dont know if grandma clothes would interest, but maybe shoes or accessories. Give the coats to the local coat drives they have every winter. Older people are always cold, a local senior center/ day center, might appreciate a sweater or too.
If there are some special items, you could take some photos and post them on Facebook to your friends ( not to public). Maybe some of your friends have moms or aunts or sisters that could use them. Then you could actually see them being used, and remember your mom that way.
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graygrammie Sep 2020
We do have a "Dress for Success" type business in town. I will have to check with them about what might be useful. I forgot all about them. Ty!
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This article on Bankrate recommends an estate liquidator.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bankrate.com/retirement/how-to-sell-your-late-parents-possessions/amp/

That might be overkill for what you need.

Is it imperative that thus be done right away, GG? You have so much on your plate right now.

Please have dad secure the jewelry from everyone right now. Just discovered that my MIL's jewelry all disappeared after her death and that her granddaughter (my stepdaughter) has nothing of her Nana's. I gave her the one pair of earrings my MIL gave me.

Find a different consignment shop. Many of them are not so strict.

Selling on Ebay can be a blast. I sold most if my mom's books that way. I carved out a couple of hours each week to attend to the packing and PO runs and made a bit of cash.
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graygrammie Sep 2020
My dad wants it done asap.

Other than the housekeeper (dad has total trust in her and leaves her alone it he house), no one comes to the house. Dad and mom retired at the ocean expecting everyone to come visit when they vacationed. Now he is there alone while all his family is inland, so very few visitors.

The consignment shop I went to is the closest one.

I will take a look at that link.
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