I need advice on Medicaid lookback and penalties; having my father come to live with us.

DO NOT bring him to your home. You have no idea what you are taking on.

1. Is he able to sign a contract in writing on what you will be paid (can he pay?) and what your exact jobs will be?

2. Are you ready to sacrifice ALL, and I mean ALL, of yourself for however long he lives? As in no vacations, no meals out, not being able to leave him alone ever, not even 10 minutes? Do you plan to visit with friends or have lunch with someone? You won't be able to. How will you handle errands you have to do? What about when you go to the grocery store? Will you have someone on hand to be at home while you are out? Someone you trust who has no problem showing up and your father will be okay with?

3. Are you okay with helping with his bathroom needs or bathing him? He may not need help with that now, but eventually he will. And he might fight you every step of the way.

4. You said he is difficult. He will be even more difficult in your home. If he has dementia or Alzheimers, he won't become a sweeter person. He will get meaner. If you're hoping he will be grateful and praise you for helping, or soften up in his old age, it's not likely to happen.

5. Can you handle being asked the same questions or hear the same noises day after day for months or years on end? This is a common issue in dementia and alz.

6. When will you do house activities like cleaning or laundry? You aren't going to have the time to do things on your schedule. Really any schedule... whatever routines you have now, will be erased. Your life will revolve around HIM.

7. It's very common for dementia/alz elders to "wander". My own grandfather had mild dementia and he would walk out of the house in the middle of the night. Didn't matter if it was 20 degrees outside; he thought he had to go to work. How will you handle it if this happens? Can you be awakened immediately by an alarm or something to let you know he has opened the door to leave?

8. How will you handle it when he is angry or combative? What plan do you have in place to calm him and keep yourself safe?

Money and such are the least of your worries now. Please reconsider.

I would not bring him to your home. If he has Dementia, that will only worsen. Since you haven't seen him, you have no idea of his decline during lockdown. And bringing him to your home may bring on a decline. With my Mom when money was running out, I started the Medicaid application in April, had her placed in LTC May 1st, she private paid 2 months and that used up her money. July 1st she started Medicaid. Its easier to place them when u can pay privately for a while.

If you still decide to bring him to your home, someone mentioned once that paying rent is better than a Caregiver agreement. Since you r getting paid, you must take out taxes and social security. It has to be on the up and up with Medicaid.

In addition to the sage comments already posted, you need to be aware that if you take him out of a facility and then you try to get him back in *after* he is a Medicaid recipient, he will most likely be on a waiting list, and at the very bottom. The current residents who qualify for Medicaid while still a resident in the facility get first dibs at those beds. There are scant few Medicaid beds in each facility because the facilities don't get reimbursed by the govt enough for them. Also, a Medicaid bed means a shared room, no more private rooms. For your father to pay you, you and he will need a written contract and that makes him an employer and taxes and SS must be withheld as such. Consider that you won't have boundaries for time off, holidays, sick days. You won't be adding to a 401K or get health care benefits. You will be on call 24/7, if not right away, then eventually, and his care will eventually overwhelm you if he lives long enough. If you are young enough and would still have years to work after he passes, this caregiving will add nothing to your resume, unless you are already in a caregiving profession. Please read on this forum under the topic Caregiver Burnout the posts of the thousands of well-meaning adult children who volunteered (or were remanded) into caregiving only to have grossly underestimated the physical, emotional, mental and financial cost. Go into it under advisement, with your eyes wide open.

You need an elder law attorney to work out a contract that is airtight, but this is an elderly man, and you will be getting your job back at some point, and until then benefits are at present quite good and may remain that way. This is no time to take on the care of someone with a lot of needs; I think you cannot image how difficult it will be, and once in your home how problematic to wind it all back. He would be much better using the money he has to remain where he is apparently happy, and then you would be wise to have Social Services help apply for medicaid and get placement best it can be. DO NOT TAKE ON THIS CARE without a good deal of thinking about it. It will change your life.

Lots of red flags here.

You really need to talk to a Medicaid expert in your state. For sure you will need a caregiver contract.

How old are you? Who else lives in your home? What level of care does Dad have? How easy would it be to move him back into a facility?