I'm caregiver to a dementia patient and I'm burned out. I hate to feel this way. What should I do?

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I live with her and here pretty much 24/7. She is my sister mother law And this journey taking care her has been stressful But i know i'm trying my best But i know she doesn't understand And she argumentive She doesn't need much help Her physcial help is good But mental is decline So i don;t feel productive And i would like to find a job That would be stabillity And I hope this is selfish of me But i need answer To know what to do Thank you Carolyn

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Get help with your care giving obligations - such as in home care, if appropriate. Do you have a caregiver agreement that clearly states the obligations of the parties (the one receiving and giving the care)? If not, see an elder law attorney about having one drafted that complies with Medicaid regulations.
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Assisted Living is NOT the answer for many as it is costly, not covered by Medicare or Medicaid ( except a few Group Adult Foster Care slots may be available @ AL in Massachusetts) Once you run out of funds or your care becomes too complex you will have to relocate. Try to get eval from a State HomeCare Agency ( every state should have some form of this assistance) You at least need respite from this 24/7 job. There is also Adult Day Health to look into
Depends on her condition and mental capacity what would work best. Research your options!
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I was wondering how old this lady is? Maybe a schedule could be created with the different family members addressing her needs so that you could you could find a job during your "time off".
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True,

Your answer on a thread is posted on a public forum.

If you want to make a private post, then you have to go to a person's page by clicking on their name, check the box private and type your message in the box.

I'm going to post this as a private message on your wall also so that your will have an example.
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Is my private answer being posted on a public forum? -1 Thess. 4:11.
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Sounds like an impossible situation--not a single person on the planet is capable of doing anything 24/7/365. If I were in your shoes, I would give 2 weeks notice, and be gone. If no family member shows up to take care of the lady, call 911 and tell them you are leaving and a vulnerable adult is alone at this address. Unless there is some other Work Contract which requires you to give more notice, you are under no obligation to provide services as you have been doing.
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blckvel: If you want to get your personal life back on track, please consider placing your mom in assisted living or nursing home or at least get in-home help for more than 3 hours a day. Getting to know a possible future spouse takes more than a few hours a day.
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Hello Joann I should of explained my situation better Yeah I did need a place to live and they need to take care of her mother law When i move in i hoping to find a job doing the day And be here at night It really not a 24 7 that i take care of her It just that i feel like im here I do get break and take trips now and then But now since the dementia is declining she need me here more I appreicate you reply and comments I'm glad for this forum very help Thank you Carolyn
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god bless everyone who is taking care of a aging mother or relative. I'm taking care of my mother with no help from family members but I do get 3 hours a day help from a nurses aide...thank god for her...but I want to date and maybe get married one day...should I just forget about trying to date and just give all my time to my mother....I'm 64 and my health is not that great. I don't want to continue to grow old alone....what should I do?
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Just thought, is ur agreement you get a place to live by taking care of MIL? Even if thisis the situation, you should have breaks. They can take care of her on weekends and after work.
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